


Priced Commodity

by Angara



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: A lot of dark people tbh, Accidentally has a lot of plot now, Actually has some miniscule amounts of plot, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Slavery, Bondage, Chastity Device, Choking, Dark!Thor, Double Penetration, Electrocution, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Gangbang, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Mind Manipulation, Nipple Clamps, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Not A Nice Story, Oops, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Power Imbalance, Prostate Milking, Sexual Slavery, Slave Training, Sounding, Whump, mention of suicide, slave!Loki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:13:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 52,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28593789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angara/pseuds/Angara
Summary: In a society, where slavery is commonly accepted, Thor's parents buy their son a slave, when he moves out for college.Loki does not accept his position easily making Thor struggle to keep his defiant slave in check- perhaps his friends can help him?
Relationships: Fandral/Loki (Marvel), Hogun/Loki, Jane Foster/Thor, Loki/Sif, Loki/Thor (Marvel), Loki/Volstagg
Comments: 361
Kudos: 308





	1. Chapter 1

“Loki?” Thor called out, once he had closed the door of his apartment behind himself and put his coat on the hanger. It slipped right off and fell in a heap on the floor, but Thor didn’t bother to pick it up. 

Loki could do that later. 

Just as he turned back towards the corridor, he saw Loki standing there, with his black hair up in a messy bun and wearing a grey, oversized shirt, that reached to his upper thighs, yellow rubber gloves covered his hands, and his expression was noticeably annoyed.

Thor must have interrupted his cleaning. 

“Master?” He asked, lifting a brow, in what could only be interpreted as a sign of disrespect. 

Thor briefly contemplated to punish the slave, both for his lack of manners, as well as his inappropriate appearance, but then decided that he simply couldn’t be bothered. His father would scold him for spoiling the slave, letting him get away with these tiny acts of defiance, but well, Loki was his slave after all, and Thor could do as he pleased. 

Even though it had been Odin who had bought the slave, insisted on the purchase really. In his father’s opinion, buying a slave was the only responsible thing to do as a parent, when Thor had moved away from home for college. 

He said that he didn’t want his son’s judgment clouded by physical need, didn’t want Thor to fall for just any woman or man who spread their legs for him, getting them pregnant, or worse yet, marrying them, for no other reason, than the fact that his soon confused sexual need for love.

The simple solution was to make sure that all of Thor's needs were met, and he could focus on his studies, rather than chasing after women, who might do nothing but to toy with his feelings or take advantage of him for his money.

And his mother was relieved that her son had someone to cook and clean for him, so that he wouldn’t have to live in his own filth, eating instant noodles for every meal, like some of her friend’s college-aged kids. 

Also, they both were of the opinion, that getting into the habit of ordering someone around would do Thor a great deal of good. After all, he was expected to manage the company one day and keeping a slave in line, would provide Thor with valuable lessons about his own rank and authority, that would give him an advantage later on in life. 

For once Thor could totally get behind his parent’s reasoning. Responsibility and pleasure seldomly aligned, but they did so beautifully in the form of Loki.

“Once you’re done cleaning, I want you to prepare dinner for tonight. Pizza, or tacos, you get to choose,” Thor said as he took off his shoes and picked up his bag. “But make a lot of it. My friends are coming over tonight and you know their appetite.” 

Loki’s expression turned from mildly annoyed to outright irritated, the very moment Thor mentioned his friends.

It wasn’t much of a secret, that the slave didn’t enjoy his classmate’s presence, and his dislike towards them had turned into outright hatred, ever since Fandral had puked into his hair during a party. 

A smile threatened to spread on Thor’s lips. Loki looked adorable like this, all indignant and angry, but if he was too lazy to punish his slave for his nonconform behaviour, he at least shouldn’t encourage it, so he kept his expression neutral. 

“Yes master,” Loki said, his displeasure obvious in his voice. 

“They’ll be here at seven. I want the food done by then. Oh and, I want you to be ready too.” 

At that last order, Loki’s body stiffened noticeably and his eyes widened in a look of alarm.

“Master, if I may, could you give closer instruction as to what you mean by ready?” 

“Wear something cute,” Thor explained, watching as Loki’s mouth gaped open. “Make sure you’re cleaned, wear a nice plug- you should be doing all of those things anyway, whenever I’m around so…” 

Thor gestured towards Loki's unkempt appearance but the slave paid no mind to it.

“You intend to whore me out to those animals?!” Loki shrieked, his face betraying nothing but utter outrage, as he stared back at Thor.

“Loki…” Thor’s voice was becoming low with warning and he clenched his jaw. If the slave didn’t shut up soon, he wouldn’t give Thor a choice but to punish him. But Loki either didn’t notice that he was treading on thin ice- or he simply didn’t care.

“You know what happened last time! You can’t be serious about this.” 

“Last time was…unfortunate,” Thor admitted reluctantly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He hated it when Loki was right. It always made an uncomfortable heavy weight settle in his stomach. 

“Unfortunate?! They put a beer bottle up my ass. They tied me up and locked me in the closet and _forgot_ me there! You forgot about me too. I was in there for-“ 

“Loki!” Thor boomed, which made the young man immediately shut up, closing his mouth with an audible click. Thor growled and shook his head. Loki would never listen to Thor until he got loud- or violent. It was tiring. “Those are my friends you’re talking about. I gave them permission to do what they wanted with you and they did. Are you questioning my decision?” 

“…no,” Loki said but he didn’t sound convincing in the slightest. 

“You are my property. You do as I say and while I have guests, you do as they tell you. Is that clear?” 

“Yes, master,” Loki said and now he bowed his head, in a perfective act of obedience. Thor sighed. It really was just an act, doubtlessly meant to avoid punishment- and the worst part was, that most of the time Thor actually fell for Loki’s manipulations like the idiot he was. 

But he couldn’t let Loki get away this time, the transgression had been too severe, even he had to admit that. 

“You’ll be wearing the cage tonight. The one with the sound,” Just that threat was enough to make Loki pale visibly, but he didn’t dare to argue with Thor anymore. Thor smiled, pleased with himself. Clever boy. “And because you’ve disrespected my friends, I’ll let them decide your punishment tonight. So, you better try to get on their good side really quick.” 

“As you wish master,” Loki said, bowing to him, his face a bland mask, that hid his true feelings. Apparently, Loki _could_ get his expression under control if only he wanted to, who would have guessed. 

“May I go on cleaning now?” 

“Yes, go on. And don’t disturb me, I’ve got an essay to write. 

Loki bowed his head once more before he went to return to his duties.

“Of course, master.”

~

“Loki? Get up and read over the essay for me,” Thor ordered. A few hours had passed since Thor had gotten home and now he looked at the document on his computer screen with a pleased expression. Below him, Loki shifted to get up from where he was kneeling in between Thor’s thick thighs, warming his soft cock in his mouth for what felt like an eternity. 

The raven-haired man wiped some drool off his chin as he stretched, then stood behind Thor to get a look at the screen as well.

Just reading the first few lines made it obvious to Loki, that Thor had produced another absolute garbage thesis, littered in spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, and just barely making sense. 

Not that he was allowed to say any of those things out loud. Merely implying that he was smarter than his master could lead to severe punishment. Of course, Thor was more negligent about his training than he ought to be, but he had proved time and time again that he could make Loki’s life hell if the slave went too far. 

“It’s…good,” Loki said, cringing at the lie, because in the very next sentence he read, that Thor named ‘nice beaches’ as a valid reason to locate a company’s headquarters in California. How he even got into business school, even with his family’s significant wealth, was as always, an absolute mystery to Loki. 

But while this airhead went to college and had a job as a CEO already secured, Loki had to alternate between scrubbing the toilet and sucking cock, occasionally smoothing out his master's mistakes along the way.

This realization never failed to make Loki burn from the inside-out with rage. 

But he had to keep himself composed. Take one breath in. One breath out. 

“You think so?” Thor smiled at him, looking all too pleased with himself. 

“There are some minor mistakes. If you allow, I offer to correct them tomorrow,” Loki said, keeping his voice carefully neutral, as he tried not to think about the effort it would take to make the essay half-way readable to whatever poor professor had to deal with Thor, while not changing the work to a degree, where it might come off as disrespect towards his master. 

And all of that, after whatever he would have to endure with Thor and his imbecile friends tonight. 

“Sure, that’s fine,” Thor said, as he shut down his laptop and turned around on his chair to look at Loki. “Is everything done so far?” 

“I set the table in the living room, where you preferably take your meals when you have guests. I prepared three different kinds of dips, the minced meat is almost done and there is a vegetarian option for Mistress Sif. The beer is cold, and I cut some vegetables, as Mistress Frigga instructed me to on her last visit.” 

“Oh my god, mom,” Thor ran a hand over his face with a groan. “You can eat the vegetables Loki. And stop taking orders from my parents.” 

“I thought you wanted me to obey your guest’s wishes, master?” Loki asked, lifting a brow. 

“Not _those_ wishes. Just the kind of wishes…that can be fulfilled while they’re here. When we’re alone, I’m the only one in control,” Thor said, running a hand through his tousled blonde hair. “Apropos. You’re not yet wearing the cage as I told you to.” 

Loki blushed, a deep shade of pink as he lowered his gaze. They both knew that he hated the cage with the built-in sound with particular intensity- but that seemed to be the entire point. 

“…you said that I should be ready by the time your guests arrive, master. They’re not here yet.” 

Thor chuckled and shook his head, Loki could see the glimmer of amusement in his electrical blue eyes, as he briefly looked up at his master. 

“You’re clever. That’s exactly what I said. But then I’ll be the one to put it on you. Bring it here.” 

“As you wish, master.” 

Loki respectfully bowed his head, even though internally he was still seething with rage. He left the room, to walk to Thor’s bedroom, where at the back of his closet he kept a box of the toys that he loved to use on Loki. 

It was a small collection of basics, some plugs, two cock cages, a few dildos, shackles, and rope…during his training Loki had learned that there were far more insidious contraptions, and he was glad that in this regard Thor was a simple man with relatively simple needs. 

Even though it would be an overstatement to call his life here pleasant. 

His master had a very healthy libido as well as an egocentric worldview, where his pleasure was the only thing of importance and on occasion, he could get unreasonably angry. While most of the time he was very lenient, sometimes something would set him off the wrong way and all of a sudden, he would lose complete control of his temper. 

He’d rather avoid getting his master to that point, his raw physical strength made him a serious threat to Loki, who could never hope to be able to fight back, even if it wasn’t for his disadvantaged position, which gave him nowhere to go.

But Loki pushed those grim thoughts aside for the time being and instead picked up the cock cage that Thor had asked for and carried it back to his master’s office, where he was sitting on his leather chair, watching some Instagram videos on his phone. 

He looked like nothing more than a spoiled, rich little brat, and thinking about it, that was exactly what he was. But despite the disdain, Loki felt for his master, he was vaguely aware of how much worse things could have ended for him. 

He remembered, at the camp, where he had been trained, people came by to look at him, considering the purchase. Among them were people with cold eyes, or evil smiles, who handled his body with either utter carelessness, or a specific desire to hurt. At the very least, Thor was no sociopath or a sadist who delighted in his agony. 

But just because things could have been a lot worse, didn’t mean that he had to like Thor. 

Even if sometimes, it was becoming hard not to. When Thor smiled at him like he was an actual person. When he played with Loki's hair or offered him tiny, meaningless acts of kindness, like being allowed to watch TV, if he stayed quiet or getting to join him on walks, or sometimes, when he ordered pizza, he got one just for Loki. 

Thor just had a charm about him, that drew everyone in, and not even Loki, who should know better, was immune to his charisma. 

“Master? If you wish, you may put it on me. But if I may…perhaps we could avoid this.” 

“You’re questioning my decisions _again_ and think that it could improve your situation?” 

Thor looked at him, doing nothing to hide the amusement on his face, as he propped his chin up on his hand. 

“No, that’s not what I meant, master. I just believe…the punishment your friends come up with, might be more than sufficient on its own,” Loki tried to argue. He despised the cage, and they were both fully aware of it. 

“You should become a lawyer!” Thor was outright laughing now. “Well, if you weren’t- never mind. We’re not in front of a court. If I want you to wear the cage, or do something, it doesn’t really matter would you think is sufficient. You do what I tell you. I thought they’d teach you that kind of thing during training.” 

Loki lowered his head, mostly to hide the expression of anger on his face. Only after a few seconds, when he had been able to draw in a few calming breaths and he knew that his eyes were no longer burning with righteous fury, he looked up at Thor again. 

“You’re right master. Please forgive me for bargaining.” 

Thor sighed, as always falling easily for his act of obedience. 

“As long as you don’t do it in front of my friends…or worse yet my parents,” He said, never saying out loud what the consequence of that would be. “But anyways. Sit down on the couch. Spread your legs.” 

Loki did as he was told and once Thor had gotten a bottle of lube from the drawer of his desk, he sat down next to Loki and put his warm, calloused hand on his pale thigh, to push up the tiny skirt he was wearing. 

Thor loved the easy access it gave him, which was the reason why most of Loki’s wardrobe consisted of little robes, skirts, and dresses, even though he held an intense hatred for those kinds of garments. 

If Loki got to choose his own clothing, he’d choose something heavy, something impenetrable, made of leather and metal, secured by a thousand straps, covering him up to his chin, something intimidating that no one could simply tear up or push aside to touch him. 

But as in everything, Loki wasn’t given a choice in the matter and it took nothing more than a brush of Thor’s hand to lift the flimsy silk fabric and expose his cock in the simple, gold-barred cage he wore. 

Obsessive masturbation was a big problem among pleasure slaves in particular, or so he was told, and it was commonly recommended to prevent them from pleasuring themselves at all, not only to limit the risk of addiction but also to keep them from becoming moody and rebellious, which often seemed to be the case with slaves who were given too much sexual freedom.

But Loki was moody and rebellious no matter what, so he didn’t quite get the point. 

He looked away, when Thor took off the necklace with the key, which he wore around his neck, and used it to open the cage Loki was currently wearing, gently easing it off. The brief touch was enough to make Loki harden almost instantly and a shameful whimper escaped him as he dug his nails into his palms. The sudden rush of blood downwards was enough to make him feel dizzy.

“Fuck, I forgot to milk you again,” Thor looked down at Loki’s hardening length with a guilty expression on his face, like one would look at the trash spilling over after forgetting to empty it. “I didn’t realize it was that long. I’ll do it tomorrow.” 

“You could…if you let me, I could take care of it myself in the bathroom. It will not take long,” Loki asked, hating, hating, hating himself for the desperation in his voice. But he wanted it so badly. The mere thought of his own fingers wrapping around his cock, focused fully on his own pleasure for just a moment, made his dick twitch visibly.

“No, the doctors told me it’s not good for you to jerk off,” Thor said after a brief moment of hesitation. 

“The doctors also told you not to let it build up for so long and yet here we are,” Loki shot back sharply, already regretting his words the moment he said them. 

“Loki,” Thor said exasperatedly. “You’re talking back again. I’ll do it tomorrow. Right in the morning, you’re even allowed to remind me. Now get me some ice from the kitchen, we need to hurry up, my friends will be here soon.” 

“Yes master,” Loki clenched his jaw as he got up from the couch, to do what his master had requested. The ice was used to cruelly chase away his erection, like so many times before, when it simply wasn’t convenient and Thor put the new cock cage on him, with surprising tenderness. 

On its own, it wasn’t too different from the one Loki usually wore, but he knew that they weren’t done yet. Loki had to squeeze his eyes shut, as the dreaded procedure began, trying his best to endure the situation. 

He had always hated sounding, it felt far too invasive and just plain…wrong. But as always, no one cared for his opinion on the subject. 

Thor guided the lubed sound to the tip of Loki’s caged cock, trying to slip it in. At first, it wouldn’t go, Thor missed a few times, and the hole wouldn’t properly align, making the man curse and Loki wince- but after a few tries, Loki felt that the cold metal had slipped in and was now being pushed deeper and deeper down his shaft, drawing a barely-there whimper from Loki’s chest, akin to the sound of a scared animal. 

“There we go,” Thor said, clearly satisfied with himself, as he kept pushing the metal rod further down until it was all the way within Loki and could be secured with a small screw at the top. Loki, let go of a tiny sob, as he got used to the feeling of being stretched and held open by the sound.

“Okay. And for talking back again, get me the clamps too. You’ve earned them.” 

Loki’s eyes suddenly snapped open to look back at his master in disbelief. 

“Please master…please no,” He begged, slowly shaking his head, but in Thor's expression, Loki could see that his master had already made a decision. 

“Loki, you don’t want to make this any worse on yourself,” He warned. “Don’t you want me to be on your side tonight when my friends come over?” 

Loki would have liked to spit out that Thor was _never_ on his side, but he swallowed the venomous words down and instead lowered his head, defeated. 

“Yes, master.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added more tags, please take a moment to check them out and proceed with caution!

Loki was done with the evening, just five minutes after the group of friends arrived. They were ten minutes late, as per usual, loud and obnoxious, making insider-jokes that got them all roaring with laughter, in the hallway.

But while Loki was done with the evening, unfortunately, the evening wasn’t done with Loki. 

He did his best not to draw attention, busying himself in the kitchen as they all got settled in the living room. Maybe they would be too busy enjoying each other’s company, to bother him. Maybe just this one time, they could think of a better way to spend their time than with Loki as their plaything in the middle.

A round of scrabble perhaps?. Okay, that might be too difficult, Loki thought. Thor didn’t know that many words and Loki didn’t believe his friends to be superior to his master in terms of intellect.

But some UNO. Monopoly. Snakes and Ladders. Or some of the games Thor had gotten for his brand new Playstation.

That had to be fun, right? 

But just as soon as Loki balanced the tray of taco shells, minced meat, and various dips to the living room, his fickle hopes were washed away, like a sandcastle built too close to the shore.

The conversation momentarily quietened as he walked in, gaze downcast in a useless attempt to deflect attention from himself. He put the tray down, then addressed his master, looking at the floor to avoid even his gaze.

“May I get you or your friends anything else, master Thor?”

“I’m good,” Thor answered and turned to look at his friends. “How about you guys?”

“I could use a massage,” Fandral said, shrugging his shoulders while winking at Loki, who dared to briefly look up at the blonde, to shoot him a glare.

Out of all the people present, Loki liked him the least, less even than Thor. His master might be a self-centered oaf but Fandral had a playful kind of cruelty, that Loki just could not stand.

He was a master of degradation and if that wasn’t bad enough, his mean jokes and taunts, spurred the others on, making them even more reckless than they would have been, to begin with.

“As you wish, Master Fandral,” Loki said, unable to keep the discontent out of his voice, as he moved to stand behind the young man, about to lay his hands on his shoulders, when he was interrupted.

“Ah! Not my shoulders, stupid. I meant my feet. They’re killing me.”

Fandral looked over his shoulder, to catch the disbelieving look on Loki’s face, offering him an obnoxiously bright smile in return.

“Eww, you’re making him touch your nasty feet?” Sif said, disgust clear in her tone as the others laughed all around them.

“What?” Fandral lifted his hands and raised his brows, to express complete innocence. “It’s not like that’s the nastiest thing he’s ever touched. You wouldn’t say anything if I let him give me a hand job.”

“Trust me, I would say something,” Sif said, as she spread guacamole on her taco. “It’s rude during dinner. And kinda weird too. But that’s both not unusual for you.”

Loki had come to kneel in front of Fandral now, listening to the conversation around him without being expected or even allowed to join in. 

Even though they were all roughly the same age, his position made any normal human interaction impossible for him- he was more of an object than a person and they were all playing nicely along with that idea. 

He reluctantly picked up one of Fandral’s feet to place it on his knee and began to massage the sole of his foot, which drew a long, exaggerated moan from the man above him.

“Call me weird all you want, Siffy. This is good.”

Above him, Loki heard the sound of people eating and laughing, the smell of food reached his nostrils, but he wasn’t allowed to eat until later when his services were no longer required, and he could only hope there would be enough leftovers to sate his hunger by then. 

He tried not to think about it, as he went on with his massage, pressing his thumbs into the arch of Fandral’s foot, which out of nowhere made the man kick him in the chest with unexpected force. 

Loki fell back and hit his head on the corner of the low coffee table, leaving him gasping, struggling to fill his aching chest with air. The blow to the head made his eyes fill with tears and he stared up at Fandral in complete shock and confusion, as his hand slowly came up to touch the back of his head, where a bump was already beginning to form. 

“What the hell?” Loki heard Hogun ask, from somewhere far away, over the static sound in his ears.

“I’m ticklish and he pressed on a weird spot,” Fandral justified himself, failing to sound the least bit sorry for what he had done. “It was a reflex.”

“Well, your reflex made him spill my beer,” Volstagg grumbled unhappily and as Loki slowly turned around, he saw that one of the bottles had tipped over with the impact of his head on the table, and beer was flowing freely down on the floor, spreading in a puddle on the oakwood planks.

Loki’s shoulders slumped.

That much for a quiet evening, without attracting attention.

“Loki get that cleaned up and bring Volstagg a new beer,” Thor ordered, not showing much concern for his slave’s wellbeing, at least not as much concern as he had for Volstagg and his spilled drink.

Loki slowly pushed himself up, shooting Fandral another hate-filled glare through his teary eyes before he went to the kitchen to get a cloth, as well as a new beer from the fridge. 

“Master Volstagg,” Loki said, his voice clearly strained from pain and seething anger, as he handed the man the bottle, who took it with a pleased hum and immediately brought it to his lips.

Afterward, Loki knelt down on the floor to wipe up the spilled beer from the floor, before it could stain the precious wood, which he had only just polished this morning.

Not that anybody cared.

“So, is he always dressed like this?” Hogun asked, making an intense effort to keep his tone perfectly neutral, but Loki was able to pick up the true motivation behind the question. He could practically feel the quiet man’s gaze on his ass, as he stretched out to wipe below the table.

“Always,” Thor answered. Loki could hear him swallowing the bite he had been chewing on before he went on talking. “Well…at least that's what he's supposed to dress like when I'm around. He’s got a mind of his own…I’ve got to remind him of his duties all the time. I spend the whole day trying to keep him in line. It gets pretty frustrating.”

“That sucks man,” Volstagg said, sounding truly sympathetic for his friend’s situation. “My parents had a slave like that once. They kept letting her get away with that stuff until she actually attacked my father one day. With the axe she took from our shed. It was awful. Luckily he didn’t get hurt, but my parents were advised to put her down. However, they had invested so much money into her at that point, that they decided to send her to a training facility instead. Believe it or not, she came back as the sweetest thing ever. That was four years ago, there was no incident ever since.”

“He’s already been through training before I got him. Doesn’t seem like it did much,” Thor argued, but the sense of curiosity was clearly audible in his tone. Loki had stopped cleaning, frozen as he listened to the conversation above him.

“Well, that’s the basic training,” Now it was Fandral speaking again and Loki’s stomach twisted just listening to him. “They try to keep it cheap, to make a profit. And it works on naturally submissive types, but some slaves are more defiant, and it won’t do shit on them. They need something stricter to see results.”

“He’s right,” Sif added, taking a sip of her beer. “Loki’s pretty defiant. And you’ve got to realize that he was enslaved pretty late. Sixteen? Seventeen? Only makes it harder to control him now.”

A light kick to his butt broke the intense focus Loki had followed the conversation with and he flinched, whipping his head around to see Thor looking directly at him.

“Finish your task, then sit down next to me,” Thor ordered, and Loki nodded his head in response.

“Of course, master.”

Loki got up, taking the soaked cloth with him to the kitchen to wring it out and put it in the laundry, but when he focused, he could still hear how the group of friends went on talking like he wasn’t even present.

“See?” Thor complained. “That’s how it goes all day. And that’s not even the worst of it. Sometimes he just ignores me completely or questions my authority. I keep having to look after him, make sure he’s doing what he’s told, and keep him from getting out of control. It’s so exhausting. I’m studying all day I don’t have the time or the energy to put up with that!”

“I know man, you shouldn’t have to,” Loki couldn’t determine who said that, but it sounded clearly sympathetic. It made his skin crawl.

With no excuse to stay any longer in the kitchen, he forced himself to make his way back to the living room, every step closer towards these people an inner fight. He avoided looking at them, as he knelt down next to Thor’s chair, with his hands crossed over his thighs, his back straight, head lowered, just as he had been taught.

“And while we’re talking about it, to my shame I must admit, that Loki spoke badly of you, as my friends today. I only deemed it appropriate for you to pick the punishment for that transgression yourselves.”

After Thor said that, the conversation momentarily quietened, and Loki’s face paled in fear of what was to come.

Fandral was the first one to break the silence, with a barking laugh.

“He actually was stupid enough to bitch to you, his master, about your friends?!”

“That’s exactly what he did,” Thor confirmed solemnly. 

“You’re right. This really is getting out of hand. One way or another you need to get him on track. What exactly did he say?”

“Loki. Tell them what you said,” Thor ordered, his voice hard as stone.

Loki shifted uncomfortably on his knees, swallowing against the lump in his throat.

“I called you animals. And questioned my master’s decision to leave me under your care,” He whispered, dreading the response he would get. 

“Okay, that is bad,” Sif said, sounding serious as ever. But a heat had crept into her voice, making a shiver run down Loki’s back. “I think the problem goes a lot deeper than just this, and you should really consider Volstagg’s suggestion, Thor. But we should definitely punish him for this. What do you guys suggest?”

“How about we put the beer bottle he spilled-“

“Fandral, will you shut up about that beer bottle?” Volstagg interrupted. “It was fun that one time. Get your own slave and you can live out your weird kink all day. I want to do something different tonight.”

“I agree,” Hogun said quietly. “That idea sucks.”

“Well, since he’s disrespected all of us, including Thor, I think that he should make it up to all of us,” Sif pointed out, giving a shrug of her shoulders.

“And what did you have in mind?” Fandral asked, mischievous tone clear in his voice- Loki could practically see the mean smirk curl around his lips, even without looking at him.

“How about, he pleasures all of us at once?”

“At once?” Thor asked, his tone disbelieving, but clearly intrigued. Loki heard the low groan of the leather chair, as his master leaned forward in interest.

“Well, we’re five people-“ 

“Yeah, and he’s only got two holes, Einstein,” Fandral scoffed.

“Wow, he can count to five,” Sif deadpanned, and Loki knew that she was rolling her eyes right now. “But anyways. Two can go in his ass. Two can get a hand job and one can get oral.”

“That’s…that might just work,” Volstagg said, sounding fascinated with the idea, while Loki felt nothing but a rising sense of panic, threatening to choke him. “Who should be where?”

“Well, I’d say Fandral and Hogun take his ass,” Sif explained, sounding all too pleased that her suggestion was so quickly accepted. Loki wanted nothing more than to strangle her at that moment and his hands tightened into useless fists in his lap.

“Yes!” Fandral said victoriously.

“Because you two are smaller than the others,” Sif went on, a smile tugging on her lips. “That’s why Thor and Volstagg can get their handjob.”

“I see, you’ve taken the best position for yourself,” Thor pointed out, amused. 

“Well, what am I to do? That’s the way it makes the most sense. And we can still change things up later on.”

“What if he doesn’t get us off?” Fandral asked, his voice dark with hunger. “I think a disobedient little slut like him needs some motivation, or he’ll think he can get away with being lazy.”

“If he fails, well then…” Thor seemed to think about that for a moment. “I’ve got some bigger sounds somewhere. I’ve never used them on him before. If he doesn’t get all of us off, we can test his limits.”

Loki’s head suddenly snapped up to look at his master and his dramatic reaction drew a few amused chuckles from the group of friends. 

“Okay, it’s settled then,” Sif decided, ignoring the hateful look Loki shot her.

Before he had gotten to know her better, Loki had briefly believed that he might have an advocate in her or at least someone who wouldn’t make things worse than they already were. As a woman, she would have to understand the feeling of being objectified, the helplessness that came with the violation- but she didn’t seem to care.

Instead, she seemed to take on an active role in his debasement purposefully, to prove to all her guy friends, that she was cool like them, that she was powerful and tough.

Better to be the hunter than the prey.

“Loki, wait for us in my bedroom, while we finish eating,” Thor ordered, just as he reached out for some salsa sauce to put on his taco. Loki wanted nothing more than to smear it all over his self-satisfied face. 

Or much rather, he’d like to go to the kitchen, to get a knife and then- 

He didn’t allow for his thoughts to drift to this dark place, where he entertained all sorts of fantasies of his master’s brutal murder. He could still do that later on, while he was waiting, to soothe his nerves.

Loki got up, from where he was kneeling on the floor and gave a slight bow of his head but didn’t say a word as he turned his back to the group of friends, who easily picked up a new topic as soon as he was walking away, talking about college, challenging their studies were and the ridiculous demands of their professors. 

Once Loki arrived in Thor’s bedroom, he knelt down on the carpet by the bed, as he was expected to, trying to block out the bits and pieces of conversation, that still floated over to him from the living room.

Of course, Loki despised these people but in his loneliness, he couldn’t help but wonder, if things had turned out different, would he be sitting with them? Eating and joking?

‘No’, Loki thought in sudden disgust. Even if his father’s gambling and the debt he had made along the way, hadn’t led to his enslavement, their lives had been too different from the very beginning. A slave was a luxury commodity after all. Much like horses, only rich people and enthusiasts managed to afford one.

Thor and his friends were born wealthy and careless, while Loki’s life had always been one of hardship and sorrow, his youth spent with his father and his two brothers, in an apartment significantly smaller, than the one Thor had been gifted by his parents as his college flat.

Even the tuition for college was an insurmountable obstacle for his family’s limited possibilities, which made a full scholarship Loki’s only hope in getting a degree. His natural intelligence and quick wit, paired with his desperate desire to escape his life, were a powerful combination. 

When he was sixteen and top of his class, he believed for his dream to be within reach. He had already begun researching the universities that might offer scholarships and found with glee that he didn’t only meet the criteria but surpassed them. 

But it was at around that time, when he was already dreaming about strolling through the old walls of some ivy league college, that the extent of his father’s addiction came to light.

First, it was just the debt that his father had failed to pay that caught up to them. Letters came in with numbers on them so high, that they made Loki gasp for breath when he first caught a glance of them. 

The letters were ignored and soon after, Laufey was investigated for thievery and fraud, the letters demanding payment changed to letters demanding his presence in front of the court. But even then Loki clung to the desperate hope that maybe all of this would turn out alright. A storm that would pass by. 

But it didn’t.

The storm turned into a howling hurricane, ripping at the foundations of Loki's life, as the investigation went on, bringing more and more evidence to light. By the end Laufey wasn’t only charged for thievery and fraud, but also unlawful possession of a gun, tax fraud, and homicide. 

In cold-blooded terror, Loki realized that Laufey had killed one of the people he owed money to, perhaps in a short-sighted hope, that it would make everything okay again, give him at least a few moments to breathe and to figure things out- but of course it didn't. 

Loki’s fate was sealed the moment Laufey was sentenced to life in prison and as was the law, all minors without a caretaker were sold into slavery, to make up for the costs of the trial and the imprisonment of their parents. 

It was argued that this law was meant to prevent people from committing crimes. After all, their child’s safety had to be a parent’s greatest concern and by that logic, everyone who would break the law despite knowing the consequences could be seen as the vilest scum alive, worse than an animal. 

And the same had to be true of their offspring, who couldn’t be trusted to go on to live an independent life if they might be a threat in disguise to their communities.

It was better for society as a whole, to keep these people under control and break the ‘chain of crime’ as they liked to call it, by turning the soon-to-be-criminals into obedient slaves instead.

Of course, studies abroad had shown that this system didn’t work at all. Putting the blame on the individual instead of looking for deeper rooted issues, did nothing in the long run, and genetics as a driving factor in crime could never be proven.

But people loved to paint criminals as monsters. And they loved their slaves even more.

Loki sighed, slumping his shoulders in a useless attempt to ease the unforgiving pressure of the metal clamps on his nipples, but of course, it did nothing and a desperate little whimper left his throat.

The temptation to take the cruel devices off, while no one was around was big. But if he was caught, his punishment would only grow more severe and even if he got away with it, it would be hell to have his sensitive nipples recover for a bit, only to have to put the clamps back on himself again, in just a few short minutes. 

Better to keep them on and try to distract himself from the pain.

He anxiously listened to the sounds coming from the living room, while trying to soothe the anxiety, making his body tremble from within.

How bad could it possibly be? He’d done all of the things they demanded of him before. Only separately. How hard could it be to just do them all at once? Thinking about it, maybe it was even a good thing. They would all get off at once, rather than taking turns on him, which meant that Loki might get this over with quickly.

A wonderful thought.

But at the same time, he knew that he wasn’t being suspicious enough. Thor’s friends had proven that they knew how to give him a hard time and they wouldn’t just take their pleasure and leave him be. 

Where would be the fun in that?

The sound of heavy steps and conversation getting closer drew Loki away from his considerations and he immediately sat up straighter and corrected his position, just in time as Thor entered the room and behind him the rest of the group, all of them looking down on Loki, with excitement written clear on their faces. 

“You sure this is going to work?” Thor asked, turned towards Sif.

“Of course, she’s sure, I bet she’s taken five cocks at once before and that’s how she knows. Is that right Siffy?” Fandral teased, nudging the young woman with his elbow, which made her roll her eyes.

“You’re just mad because no one liked your idea,” Sif said, sounding completely unimpressed by her friend’s taunting. “Loki. Get on the bed. On all fours.”

Loki did as he was told, facing away from the group. There were no other options and despite his promise, he knew that Thor wouldn’t be on his side if he voiced his discomfort. 

Once Loki was in position, Sif stood behind him, flipping the fabric of his skirt up, to reveal him to herself and the others. Behind him, the men had gone quiet, but Loki could feel their hungry eyes resting on him, making him squirm in shame, that still gnawed on him, no matter how many times he was exposed in such a humiliating display.

Not that Sif cared much about his comfort. She ungently removed the plug from his hole, ignoring the quiet whimper it drew from Loki, and put it aside, before she roughly pushed three of her fingers into him, scissoring them apart, to roughly stretch him open. 

Loki bit down on his lips. He refused to let them hear his discomfort already when they had barely gotten started. He had to at least try to keep his dignity, even if it was only while he was being stretched open.

But Sif didn’t waste much time on Loki’s preparation. 

She withdrew her fingers after only a few brief minutes, before she took a hold of his collar, to maneuver Loki to sit up. He wasn’t given a choice but to follow her movement if he didn’t want to choke himself.

What he wasn’t prepared for, was how close they suddenly were, their faces right in front of each other, and Loki's gaze was captured by her eyes. They were brown with olive specks, first fine lines from laughter around them, and a few freckles were scattered across her high cheekbones. 

For a few moments, she looked right back at him, studying his face, the same way he was studying hers.

“Sif…” Loki tried, keeping his voice low, while pleadingly fixating her eyes. “Please. You know I need more preparation than that…grant me that at least. I might tear otherwise. Please you’ve got to know how it feels-“

Loki realized too late that he had gone too far. Sif’s eyes quickly grew cold and defensive and she violently yanked Loki back by his collar, making him gasp for breath, as tears instantly filled his eyes.

“He’s ready,” She proclaimed, looking back at the group of men and as Loki followed her gaze, with his own teary eyes, he saw that they had already taken off their pants and were stroking themselves while staring at him, like a pack of wolves would stare at a limping deer. 

“What did the bitch say to you?” Fandral asked, leaning against the doorframe lazily stroking his hard cock, and his dark lust-filled eyes burnt into Loki’s. 

“He begged. What does it matter?” Sif asked and Fandral laughed in response. 

Loki turned his head to look at Thor pleadingly, but the man was laughing along with his friends, with no concern for Loki. 

And why would he be concerened?

This was after all his righteous punishment. 

“Hogun you go first.”

The man did and with some instruction from Sif, who seemed to have the most precise idea on how to make it all work, he lied down on his back, and Loki was directed to straddle his crotch facing away from him.

Loki couldn’t help the ragged moan falling from his lips, as he sank down on the man’s cock. It still went easily enough, especially with the lube Sif supplied. But Loki had a feeling that it wasn’t meant for his comfort, but rather to give the men entering him a nice, smooth slide. 

The next one to join them on the large bed was Fandral.

Loki was made to lie down with Hogun’s cock still buried deep within him, half resting on top of the man’s chest, with his shoulders and head propped up on a pillow.

“There we go beautiful,” Fandral said, as he was hovering above Loki’s face, looking down at the young man, like he was his prey, as he lined up his cock to Loki’s stuffed hole. “You’ll be a good whore, will you? This is what you were made for. Time to prove your worth.”

Fandral bowed his head down, to suck on one of Loki’s tortured nipples, making the slave shout in pain and surprise, arching off the bed, only to be held down by Sif’s hand.

“You’ll make him tighten up,” Sif accused Fandral, but the man only shot her a radiant smile.

“Maybe that’s the point,” He answered nonchalantly, before he focused his attention back on the writhing body below him, as he began to press his cock against Loki’s hole. At first, the tight ring of muscle refused to open up for him. The stretch was too much and he was already filled up, but Fandral was insistent, adding more lube and more pressure until finally, the head of his cock slipped inside, making Loki gasp in a desperate breath, which he released again in a pained shout.

The slave was trying to get away from the sharp pain now, but he didn’t stand a chance, with the way that he was pinned on Hogun’s cock already, hands gripping his hips, his thighs, his shoulders, to keep him from twisting away from the painful intrusion.

It was too much. 

Loki’s eyes were wide, his breath flat and rapid, as Fandral forced his way inside with sharp, brutal thrusts, that seemed to be immensely pleasurable to Hogun, who was moaning hoarsely below him. 

By the time that Fandral was fully within Loki, a thin sheen of sweat had formed across Loki’s pale, lithe body, and instead of struggling to get away, his body was now perfectly still, only his chest rose and fell with shallow gasps of air.

He was stretched open impossibly wide, his abused rim twitching as he struggled to relax around the intrusion.

But his ordeal was far from over, the bed dipped considerably, as Thor and Volstagg both joined them, eager to take their own pleasure from Loki’s overwhelmed body. Loki’s gaze skittered over to Thor’s blue eyes and he slowly shook his head, his hand twitching at his side, as he was about to reach out for his master.

“Please Master…” He whispered softly, waiting for a shred of mercy, that he knew wouldn’t come. The ocean eyes looking back at him stayed hard, they only grew a little bit annoyed at Loki’s pleading.

It was bad manners and they both knew.

“Loki. Just shut up,” Thor said with a sigh and then took a hold of Loki’s frail wrist to wrap the slave’s long fingers around his aching length. On Loki’s other side, Volstagg followed his friend’s example and guided Loki’s hand around his cock, groaning as the slave’s nimble fingers tightened around him.

But the set up wasn’t complete yet. 

While Loki had not been paying attention, Sif had gotten rid of her clothing and now carefully maneuvered herself to sit down on Loki’s face, her thighs on either side of his head, as she shifted experimentally to find the right position for herself. 

Loki felt claustrophobic, trapped underneath too many bodies, blocking his sight, holding him down, touching him in too many places…it was like drowning, and Loki felt the desperate urge to push everyone off, kick them away and run. But there was nowhere to go.

He was completely and utterly trapped, not just physically but mentally, knowing that any attempt of escape would only make his situation worse.

A sudden sharp pain in his chest pierced through the panic and it took Loki a moment to recognize it as a harsh tug on one of the clamps, urging him to move and he hurriedly did so, tightening his grip on the cocks he held in his hands, moving in slow, unsure strokes. It was difficult to start a rhythm without being able to see but the muffled moans reaching his ears meant that he was doing something right.

But of course, it wasn’t enough. 

His hair was twisted roughly and after a moment of flickering panic Loki realized that it must be Sif, demanding attention to herself and carefully, while keeping the movement of his hands up as best as he could, he started to lap and suckle on the cunt that was pushed demandingly onto his face.

He found that Sif was already dripping wet, the taste of her flooding his mouth as he was made to swallow it down, over and over again. She was enjoying this, there was no doubt about it. Not just the attention she received from Loki, but his suffering turned her on and the realization made Loki shiver from deep within his core.

All that happened within only a few seconds and a new layer of misery was added to Loki’s situation as Fandral began to move within him, fucking into his hole in his typical, sharp, punishing thrusts, drawing a helpless moan from Loki’s chest, as his body was jostled.

Moments later Hogun thrust upwards as well. His position only allowed for small, rolling movements of his hips but with the way he was so deep within Loki and Fandral’s brutal pace along his own, the sensation was maddening to Loki, who became so preoccupied with just trying to drag air into his lungs, that the grip of his hands turned limp and the rhythm that he had struggled to build up faltered.

Of course, that wouldn’t do, and he was painfully reminded of his forgotten task by a sharp twin pain on his nipples, as both men brutally demanded their pleasure from him. 

Loki whined in desperation. It was sheer impossible to focus on the movement of both of his hands as well as his mouth, while two cocks were brutally fucking into him, causing mind-numbing waves of pain and involuntary pleasure to crash down on him, burying him.

But Loki had to try to fulfill the demands, anything else wasn’t an option, not when any negligence was immediately punished by a pull on his hair or a twist of his sore nipples, which instantly got him back on track, only for him to start slipping again, a few minutes later when the sensations became too much to bear- it was a torturous circle, starting over and over again and Loki was trapped within it.

It only grew worse when Sif found something far more interesting to motivate him, besides yanking his hair. She leaned forward to toy with Loki’s caged cock, making his body stiffen in dread and fear. 

Sif ground her hips against his face, giving away her excitement at the new way to torture the slave, which she had just discovered. Loki’s cock was swallowed by a tight, wet heat as Sif took him into her mouth, well aware that it brought him no pleasure, only more agony, as she raided Loki’s body for her own satisfaction.

At first, Loki was relieved, when Sif seemingly grew bored with suckling on his dick, which was now straining painfully against the gold bars of the cage, failing to grow hard. But it turned out she had something far more malicious in mind.

Loki couldn’t tell what she was doing when she started toying around with the cage. His mind was torn between coordinating the movements of his hands and his tongue and a few especially sharp thrusts from Fandral threatened to break his focus, which would be punished immediately. He only noticed what Sif was doing when it was too late.

Not that he could have prevented it from happening, but perhaps he could have readied himself for the sensation that was about to come.

Sif had loosened the screw keeping the sound buried within his cock and was now pulling it free in a slow, calculated movement.

Loki startled and thrashed to break free against his better knowledge. He couldn’t take this. With everything else happening to him, he couldn’t be forced to withstand this- but Sif intended to prove the opposite to him. 

In response to his struggles, four strong pairs of hands tightened their hold on him, around his legs, his arms, his chest, and Loki sobbed as he failed to twist away, while Sif pushed the sound back down his sore cock, fucking him in the most twisted way. 

He barely noticed that more wetness was leaking from Sif’s cunt than usual, but he almost choked on it, as the sound was pushed down his cock in a particularly harsh motion and he realized that the woman must have come, during his ordeal. 

Loki’s conscious flickered off and on, and he felt like he might be dragged down into darkness, but bright pain in his chest made his mind shoot rapidly back up to the surface. The clamps had been yanked off in a cruel movement and Loki whimpered pathetically as Thor’s hot mouth tightened around his nipple, nibbling on the sore nub with his teeth.

After Sif, Fandral was the first one to come, spilling deep within Loki and Hogun followed not long after. They didn’t withdraw from him, but rather stayed buried deep within Loki's body.

But at the very least their relentless fucking stopped, making it the tiniest bit easier for Loki to focus on his tasks, which he did with feverish desperation, only wanting this torture to be over as quickly as possible. 

He quickened the movement of his hands, did his best to focus pressure on the sensitive spots at the base and below the cockhead, just as he had learned to, and was soon rewarded by the warm spill of come over his left hand, as Volstagg released himself with a heavy moan, that was loud enough to reach his ears, even through Sif’s legs that were still covering his ears.

But it wasn’t over until Thor came too, pushing Loki’s hand away to direct the spurt of his come on the man’s chest, hot enough to burn and marking him for all to see.

With their leader satisfied, the group came to the silent agreement to stop. Fandral withdrew from Loki’s aching hole and got off the bed together with Volstagg and Thor, who went to get dressed while chatting and laughing among one another.

Next Sif got off Loki’s face, her thighs glistening with spit, come and…tears. Loki only noticed now that quiet tears were seeping from his eyes, their wetness barely noticeable with the mix of fluids covering his face, making him feel used and sticky.

With a sharp tug on his collar, he was reminded to get off of Hogun, which Loki did with his thighs trembling uncontrollably. The moment the man’s cock was freed from his gaping hole, thick come dropped down his thighs, onto the sheets, completing the shameful feeling of being utterly and completely debauched.

Used in every way possible. 

And all the bodies that had crowded him, demanding their pleasure from him, dispersed quickly, leaving him alone on the bed, as soon as they had gotten what they wanted from him. 

“I hope that was a lesson for you Loki,” Thor said as he buttoned his jeans, and Loki nodded, not trusting his voice enough to speak, as he swallowed down a sob, that attempted to claw its way up his throat.

But his master wouldn’t let his wordless answer slide.

“What do you say to that?” Thor asked, a hard edge to his voice.

Loki knew his lines exactly. But his throat was tight, and his lips were numb, and he had to put in every bit of willpower to obey the order and save himself more punishment for tonight.

“Thank you,” Loki choked out, his voice brittle and strained. “For teaching me a lesson.”

“There we go,” Thor answered, clearly satisfied. “We’ll watch a movie in the living room now, don’t disturb us. Get cleaned and then change the sheets. You may go to bed afterwards.”

“Thank you, master,” Loki bit down on his trembling bottom lip, keeping his gaze lowered as the group left the room. The last thing he heard was Fandral, who accused Thor of spoiling him again, by allowing him to rest so soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...it turns out it was more challenging than I thought, to write six characters together in a scene. Also, it turns out that Thor is even worse as a member of a group, a classic phenomenon, which Loki had to suffer from...and also now there's some background info, that some of you have been asking for! How else to explain, except a corrupt, inhuman political system??
> 
> I'd be excited to hear your thoughts, or maybe ideas on the chapter, every time I see a notification in my inbox, it just brightens up my day :)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed!


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Loki was woken up at six am by the familiar buzzing of his collar around his neck and he got up from his mat at the foot of Thor’s bed. 

Loki did his best to move quietly, even if he became gradually aware of the aches all throughout his body, once he got up. But obedience came naturally to him if it meant that Thor would stay asleep and he wouldn’t have to deal with his master and his demands for a while longer.

For a brief moment, he looked down at his master in the dim light of the room, how he was lying on his back, his arms and legs spread out like a starfish, snoring softly with his mouth hanging open. Thor wouldn’t be up for another two hours at least and even then, he would be dazed and tired for at least another hour until he had gotten his coffee which Loki had brewed, and eaten his breakfast, which Loki had cooked. 

But Loki couldn’t even be mad, at this injustice.

Those quiet morning hours were precious to him. The apartment belonged to him, everything was silent, and in the dreamlike light of dawn, it was easy to pretend that he was free.

Now Loki moved out of the bedroom, softly closing the door behind himself before he walked to the kitchen on bare feet. He was limping slightly, he was sore and exhausted and the last night still clung to him like a nightmare, that just wouldn’t loosen its grip on him in the light of day.

When Loki passed the living room, his shoulders slumped down further than they already were, as he saw the mess the group of friends had left behind.

Salsa sauce was spilled on the coffee table, already dried, beer bottles were lying on the floor, among Dorito wrappers and broken tortilla shells, one of the chairs was tipped over, dirty plates, cutlery, and glasses were standing all throughout the room, and Loki yelped in unexpected pain as he stepped on a sharp-edged bottle cap, that had been carelessly dropped on the floor.

Loki swallowed down the pain and the anger boiling up in his chest, deciding to leave the mess for another few minutes to get himself something to eat in the kitchen. He couldn’t deal with that on an empty stomach, especially not since he hadn’t eaten last night, too anxious to draw attention from the group, to sneak into the kitchen. 

Better to be hungry, than to run into Fandral on his fourth beer.

Unfortunately, despite the generous amount of food Loki had prepared yesterday, there were hardly any leftovers, except for what was spilled on the table or spread on the floor, so instead, Loki ate the vegetables Thor had so generously allowed him to eat. Along with it, he raided the fridge, taking something here and there but never emptying something on his own, that's the only rule he followed in regards to food.

Thor was too lazy to care much about what his slave did and didn’t eat, as long as none of his snacks were missing, so at the very least Loki didn’t have to worry about going hungry.

Once Loki was done eating, he began to tidy up the living room, cleaning the floors, scrubbing stains from the upholstery, removing dried sauce from the table’s surface, and opened the windows to get rid of the smell of stale beer and fast food, until the room was once more in the pristine state, that it was in yesterday, before these ogres had come and destroyed everything.

Only the marks on his body were left as proof that they had been here and they didn't disappear with a bit of scrubbing. Purple bruises were already blooming on his hips, his thighs, around his arms, where they held onto him. His chest was still sore, and his ass ached badly with every step he took.

But he couldn’t rest. 

In less than an hour Thor would be getting up for his workout and by then the breakfast was supposed to be ready.

And because today was Saturday, that meant that he would be expecting pancakes for breakfast. By now Loki knew Thor’s preferences by heart, how he liked his omelet, which toppings he preferred for his pancakes, or how to serve him his coffee. Even if he didn't want to, he was becoming more and more effective at fulfilling his master's needs, while he got more and more out of touch with his own wants and desires. 

But he couldn't dwell on that thought. It was too depressing.

Instead, Loki fell into a familiar rhythm in the kitchen, opening and closing the cupboards and drawers that had become so familiar to him those last few months, knowing exactly where to find what he was looking for. 

Once Loki had prepared the batter for the pancakes and had set the table, he went to wake up his master with a cup of coffee, three teaspoons of sugar, and a lot of cream in it. That’s the way Thor liked it. Sweet and easy, like everything else in his life. 

Loki gently knocked on the door, hearing a groan from inside, at which he entered the room, put the cup down on Thor’s bedside table, and opened the curtains, to allow the warm sunlight to seep inside.

Thor only woke up slowly, spending a few more minutes with his eyes closed, before he reluctantly sat up in bed and reached out for his cup of coffee, with a yawn.

“I hope you slept well, Master,” Loki said, repeating the lines he was expected to say. 

Ever since the mention of a training camp last night, he decided to try and keep on track. 

Thor wouldn’t go through with it of course…he was too lazy and who would do all of the work around the house, if Loki was gone for training? It was simply too inconvenient, and Loki knew that convenience was very important to his master. 

But even though unlikely, the mere mention of a camp, more cruel and effective than the last, had made a heavy fear settle in the pit of his stomach and it simply wouldn't go.

“Hm, yeah, it got late last night. I think they left at around three am,” Thor said, his voice still rough with sleep. “You must be happy they didn’t stay the night, huh?”

Thor shot him a grin then, which Loki didn’t answer. He didn’t say anything in response, because after last night he didn’t want to invite any more punishment, even though the mere idea of those five people snoring in the guest and the living room, demanding breakfast, or a morning blowjob made a cold shiver run down his spine.

“It would have been fun. But my parents are coming to visit today, and I don’t really want them to run into each other,” Thor chuckled, not noticing the look of wariness spreading on Loki’s face.

“Excuse my question, but when is their visit scheduled?” Loki asked carefully, his brows drawn together in a frown.

“I didn’t tell you? Ah, shit I must have forgotten. They’ll be here at four. Then I didn’t tell you to bake some cake either, did I?” 

Loki slowly shook his head, as Thor only shrugged.

“Well, do something nice then. Something…sophisticated, do you know what I mean? Not like a child’s birthday cake. I want them to think I’m well put together and mature and everything…that kind of cake.”

Loki kept to himself, the fact that there was no cake sophisticated enough in this world to make Thor look mature.

“May I suggest a coffee and walnut cake?” Loki asked, the recipe was in the cookbook Thor's mother had gotten him, briefly after they had bought him. 

“My dad’s allergic to walnuts," Thor sighed. "You’re so stupid sometimes, I must have told you a thousand times.”

“I’m sorry master,” Loki bowed his head, despite being sure that Thor mentioned that fact for the very first time. “How about a carrot cake instead?”

“Hm. You think that’s an adult kind of cake?”

“It has vegetables as the main ingredient. I would suppose that’s very mature.”

“That’s a point,” Thor said with a slow nod as he drank more of his coffee. “I think my mom likes carrot cake too. So just do that.”

Loki nodded in agreement, all while seething with anger inside. 

Without even acknowledging it, Thor had ruined all of his plans for the day and Loki would have to rearrange all of his tasks to accommodate the visit of Thor’s parents. Not that Thor even considered any of this. 

As far as Thor was concerned, all of his food was created in the blink of an eye by magic, just like the apartment kept itself clean on its very own. At times he even joked that Loki was the lucky one for getting to stay home when he had to go to his early morning classes, while blissfully unaware that Loki had gotten up two hours earlier than him, to prepare breakfast and lunch for him, and would kill to go to these classes in his master's stead.

Loki waited until Thor had emptied his cup of coffee before he spoke up again.

“Master, if I may, you promised that you would…take care of me today,” Loki said, a flush already spreading on his high cheekbones.

Milking was one of the most shameful procedures he was subjected to, if not the most shameful. There was no satisfaction or enjoyment in it for him, but he was made to crave it nonetheless because his balls were already starting to grow sensitive and it wouldn’t be long before they would be outright painful if he didn’t get release.

“What?” Thor looked back at him, confused.

Loki wanted to scream in frustration, for being forced to say it out loud.

But he swallowed the frustration down, along with all the anger he had already felt today, to bubble and seethe in his chest.

“You gave me permission to remind you to milk me today,” Loki’s voice almost cracked with pure shame and rage and he cast his gaze down towards the floor, to hide the fire and the sheen of tears in his eyes. 

“Ugh, Loki, I haven’t even had breakfast yet. Can’t that wait?”

“No. After breakfast, you will insist on going to the gym. And when you come back, your parents will be here. And then you’ll forget again. You said you’d do it this morning,” Loki’s hands were balled into fists. He was made to beg for his own degradation and worst of all, it wasn’t just empty phrases he recited like so often. This time around he really meant it, making the shame sink in that much deeper.

“Loki, you’re being pushy again! Who are you to tell me what to do? If I want to go to the gym after breakfast, I'll go!” Thor’s voice was growing louder but Loki couldn’t let go. It simply wasn’t right.

Thor had promised. 

It was Thor’s responsibility to care for him.

Now Loki was looking directly into his master’s eyes, letting him see the fury on his face, as all the anger he had swallowed down so far started to boil over.

“Then let me do it on my own!” 

“You know exactly why I can’t do that. You’re just trying to manipulate me Loki and I won’t let that happen! I decide! You just get to do what I tell you and nothing more. Got it?”

Loki let go of a frustrated scream, and because it didn’t seem like an adequate enough reflection of his anger on its own, he picked up the empty cup from the nightstand and threw it against the wall, letting it shatter into a hundred pieces that rained down on the floor.

“It’s not fair!” Loki screamed, his voice high pitched and shrill. “You promised! You promised you’d be on my side last night, but you weren’t! You never were, you never do anything, you’re just a big, lazy baby and you think that you’re so strong and so grown-up but only because I do everything for you. Not even your parent’s money could keep you in college if it wasn’t for me!”

Thor was out of bed in the blink of an eye and grabbed Loki by the throat to slam him against the wall with full force and then tightened his hold until the slave was gasping for breath like a fish on land.

“You stupid whore!” Thor shouted, right next to Loki’s ear. “You’ll fucking regret this. I _own_ you. You’re nothing, You’re nobody, you’re just a cocky slave that just. Won’t. Learn. Its. Place.”

With every last word, Thor hit Loki’s against the wall, mad rage radiating off of him, like lightning, before he finally let go, letting Loki slump down on the floor, gasping desperately for breath, as his black hair covered his face like a curtain.

“You’re worthless,” Thor spat out. “And stupid. You think you’re smarter than me. But if you were actually smart, you’d know when to shut up. Clean up the mess you’ve made, make me breakfast. And don’t speak another word. Not one more.”

Loki moved up to his knees, still sucking in one painful breath after the other, his throat hurting badly with the force of Thor’s grip. 

Even if he wanted to speak, he wouldn’t be able to. 

Slowly and by leaning against the wall as he got up, he moved onto his feet, ignoring the dizziness that threatened to overcome him. It would pass. He knew by now.

By the time Loki had gotten up and looked around, Thor had already left the room and Loki found that he was on his own. 

It took a moment to formulate a thought in his hazy mind, but when Loki finally managed to, he decided that it was best to prepare breakfast first, to not further fuel his master’s anger by letting him wait. His mind was wiped blank and his body moved automatically as he poured the batter into the pan, into perfect circles, then flipped them over to evenly brown them on both sides, until they were fluffy and soft, just the way Thor liked them.

He put the plate with the stack of pancakes down in front of his master, neither of them saying a word, as Thor began to eat with large bites, like nothing was wrong at all.

While Thor finished his breakfast, Loki cleaned up the broken porcelain from the bedroom.

It was after he had put the broken pieces in the trash and had made Thor’s bed, the way he did every morning, that his master returned to the bedroom, now fully dressed and with a grim expression on his face.

In his hands, he held two lengths of rope as well as the dreaded prostate massager used for milking.

Seeing both, it wasn’t hard to guess what Thor had in mind and involuntary tears welled up in Loki’s eyes, as he slowly shook his head. 

“Please…” He whispered. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said. I'm still sore- please don't make me.”

“I told you to shut up,” Thor said harshly. “I’m being too soft on you. You just think you can do whatever you want to. I thought last night might have been a lesson for you. But now I think it just keeps getting worse. Put your hands behind your back.”

Loki didn’t make the mistake of disobeying the order. Quietly he crossed his wrists behind his back and turned around so that Thor could tie them together with the rope he had brought. He made short work of it and once he was done, he pushed Loki down on the freshly made bed, leaving Loki no chance to catch himself.

Thor didn’t give him a moment to recover, he immediately went on to tie Loki’s ankles and knees together and then handled Loki’s bound body to lie on its side. But it wasn’t until Thor removed the plug from Loki’s sore hole and reached for the bottle of lube on his nightstand, that a panicked whimper was released from Loki’s chest. 

“You’ve earned this,” Thor told him harshly. “You went too far, and you know it. My friends are right. I’ve been too lenient and you’re too stubborn.” 

Behind his back, Loki heard that Thor was squeezing some lube on the strangely shaped toy. Loki knew how it looked like even without seeing it, the strange c-shape, with the bulbous head that was designed to press directly into his prostate, while on its other side, there was a smaller, flat surface with silicone nubs all over it, meant to vibrate against his perineum. 

Loki sobbed quietly as it was pushed inside.

Thor wiggled it a little until he was happy with its placement and then gave Loki’s ass a stinging slap.

“I’ll go to the gym now. I hope by the time I’m done you’ll be satisfied.”

“Master, please, please I’m begging you,” Loki tried once more, his voice hoarse from having been choked so harshly, but the desperation made him go on and on, against his better knowledge. “You can’t do that. Please. I didn’t mean what I said, let me make it up to you, please.”

But Thor wouldn’t listen. Without another word he pressed the button of the remote, turning the device on, and left the room without turning back towards his slave, who was starting to writhe on the bed and let go of a long, ragged moan, as the vibrations began their assault on his prostate.

~

Thor took his time at the gym. 

He needed to work out his frustrations and he supposed running a few miles on the treadmill and hitting the punching bag was a better outlet than giving his slave the beating of a lifetime.

Frigga always told him that he underestimated his own strength and while that might not be true, he knew that he easily slipped into a raged frenzy, if he was pushed too far and then he'd see red, and nothing else mattered other than his desire to hurt and to break.

This morning, only the knowledge that his parents would come by to visit, had held him back, from going any further than he already had. After all, they would be mad, if they saw Loki damaged. He had cost them a small fortune and Thor remembered very well the time when he had crashed the Porsche he had gotten for his eighteenth birthday.

His parents had been furious with him. And Loki was much more expensive than the Porsche- but then again, the car couldn’t just heal the way Loki did.

At the thought of his unruly slave, Thor hit the bag with more force, making the hook holding it up from the ceiling squeak dangerously.

Loki was supposed to be perfect. That’s why his parents had gotten him. Pretty, well-mannered, intelligent, and a slave for life. They were the most sought after. There were some people who wanted less commitment and preferred to buy a slave whose forced servitude would be limited to a few years, but those slaves were also rumoured to be more disobedient and restless because they were only counting down the days to their freedom without fully embracing their role.

The fact that Loki had been enslaved so late in life, only seemed to be a minor flaw, when they had bought him. 

The saleswoman had promised them, it wouldn’t have long-term effects on his behaviour and that with a firm hand and a bit of patience, Loki wasn’t any more likely to show signs of disobedience than any other slave. 

Which turned out to be just a fucking lie. 

He’d been so stupid. His dad who had been suspicious from the beginning had told him to go for a quiet and reserved young man, whose training had started when he was thirteen, with mousy hair and a meek demeanour, but Thor didn’t even listen. The other boy had lacked Loki’s beauty and elegance and he didn’t have the same emerald green eyes, that had fascinated Thor since the first time he had looked into them.

He would have saved himself a lot of trouble if he had just listened to his father.

Thor stopped his rigorous assault of the punching bag and stepped back, his chest heaving with deep breaths.

He could already hear his parents saying ‘we told you so’ if he talked to them about the troubles he had with Loki. But Volstagg’s suggestion wouldn’t get out of his head. 

The idea of sending Loki away and getting him back just as beautiful as ever but instead sweet and well-behaved would be a dream come true. 

Thor was already fantasizing about Loki, genuinely sweet and lovely, listening to every tiny cue coming from him, as he was supposed to, never giving him a hard time, like he permanently did now.

All Thor would have to do to achieve this, was to convince his parents. And as a lifelong only-child, Thor was used to getting what he wanted.

The thought kept ghosting around his head as he made his way back to his apartment. Freshly showered and brimming with energy from his workout, Thor became more and more confident that his problems were going to be solved soon.

He unlocked the door and was greeted by pained whimpers and weak cries coming from his bedroom. Loki was probably too preoccupied to have heard the door open and Thor stayed quiet as he walked down the corridor and entered his bedroom.

The sight that greeted him there made his mouth go dry. 

Loki’s body was shivering and twitching, trying hopelessly to get away from the relentless sensation that had probably stopped being pleasant a long while ago. Thor didn’t even bother to check the time, to see for how long he had been gone.

It had apparently been more than enough.

When Thor sat down on the bed, Loki startled and twisted to look at him, his eyes swollen and red, glistening with tears that had left salty streaks across his ruddy cheeks, where they had been flowing down in rivers.

As Thor’s gaze travelled further down Loki’s shaking body, he saw the puddle of cum that had leaked from Loki's caged cock, that was now only twitching softly in response to the overstimulation. Empty. Milked dry.

“Please, please, stop, I can’t, please master, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, stop it,” Loki was babbling wildly, feverish desperation drawn across his features, which made Thor's own cock swell in his pants. Loki was just too beautiful, even exhausted and desperate like he was now.

“Fine,” Thor said, at which Loki only dropped his head and sobbed in relief.

He turned off the toy and the low buzzing sound faded, leaving only Loki’s ragged breaths and whimpers to fill the room, the sound of his body rustling the fresh sheets as he shifted on them. Those whimpers changed to pained sobs when Thor reached out to pull the toy from his hole, which looked red and sore and so very inviting.

Thor reached out to trace it with his thumb, absently noticing the shock going through Loki’s body and the low whine coming from his throat. For a brief moment, Thor wondered if he had gone too far and his gaze flickered over to Loki’s face, to see that the slave had his eyes squeezed shut. 

But the worry evaporated, the moment he remembered Loki’s words and his disobedience.

Loki made him look weak-willed, like less of a man, if he kept acting up like that, and Thor was just so done going along with it like there was nothing wrong with it.

“You’re happy now?” Thor asked. “I’d say you’re probably all empty.”

“Y-yes,” Loki admitted, his voice hoarse.

Thor looked at his young slave expectantly. Would he say his lines like he was supposed to?

The seconds of silence that followed made Thor doubt it, but then Loki worked his throat, licked his lips, closed his eyes again.

“Thank you, master. For correcting my behaviour.”

Thor scoffed and shook his head, but he still accepted the gratitude, even though it rang hollow. Loki would start to mean what he said soon enough, Thor was sure about that. 

He reached out to loosen the knots that had kept Loki’s wrists and ankles tied, releasing the slave from his bondage, and watched as the young man moved slowly, stiffly, testing out his limbs like he was using them for the very first time.

“I want you to change the sheets. They’re all dirty again,” Thor ordered first, as he got up from the bed. “And when you’re done, I want you to read over my thesis and then get things ready for my parent’s visit. They should be here in about two hours.”

Thor was already by the door and he almost missed the quiet whisper, barely even a broken breath coming from his slave, but the words were still unmistakable, as was the emotion they were spoken with.

_“I hate you.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there's another chapter of this and let's just say, Thor hasn't gotten any nicer since the last time. But if my writing has one motto, it's "it has to get worse before it can get better".   
> So at least there's that. 
> 
> I'd be very curious to hear about your thoughts and maybe even ideas for this fic!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think by now it's pretty clear that this story is rather dark in nature, but I just want to put out another warning before this chapter. Please check the updated tags and proceed mindfully! 
> 
> Also thank you so much for your support so far and your amazing comments, I hope you'll like this chapter!

“So, how are your studies going?” Odin asked as Loki poured him a cup of coffee.

Unlike yesterday’s visit, where the attention had been on him for the better part of the evening, now Loki had been entirely ignored so far. No one looked at him, spoke to him, or even acknowledged his presence- he was just a ghost, refilling everyone’s drinks, serving cake, and kneeling next to Thor in the meantime.

It was a pleasant change to last night- though pleasant might be an overstatement yet again.

Loki was wearing his decent-people-are-visiting-clothes, the only set he owned, that wasn’t ridiculously revealing, or offering easy access to him in some other way.

He wore a pair of grey pants, and a grey long-sleeved shirt, hiding away the bruises littering his body. But his rank was still made clear by his bare feet and the collar locked snugly around his throat. 

An identification number was neatly engraved into the metal and Loki was aware that among its range of functions, was a tracking device, that would make him easy to find wherever he was.

Apart from that, the collar could be programmed to wake him up every morning and it was capable of delivering powerful shocks. However, owners were discouraged from using that feature too frequently, because it was shown to cause damage in the slave’s nerve system if it was used too often and so that cruel function was reserved for emergencies, like an attempted escape, or an attack.

Loki had only experienced that feature once, during training, so that he would know what it would feel like.

It was a vivid sensation of burning from the inside out, every single one of his nerve endings screaming and sizzling for an impossibly long time until it all stopped, and darkness washed over him, heavy and frightening. The memory was still fresh and even as Loki continued to toy with ideas of escape or even plotted his master’s cruel death, he had never seriously contemplated going through with any of his plans. 

The looming threat of being shocked, before he could even get to the door, held him back like it did so many other slaves.

“It’s pretty stressful,” Thor answered his father while munching on a piece of carrot cake. “We have to write all those papers and the exams will be soon…they’re crazy to think that we can do all of that at once.”

“Oh, I remember those nights before the exam,” Frigga answered with a laugh, as Loki stepped beside her to fill her cup of coffee once more. She briefly looked over at Loki and offered him a polite smile, before she went on with her conversation.

The smile made a spark of warmth bloom in Loki’s chest, swallowed up too quickly by the darkness around it. Loki felt a sudden sense of longing, for that shred of kindness he had just been offered but he knew better than to think that he could trust Frigga.

She might not see him as a fuck toy, or a punching bag. Instead, she treated Loki more like a maid. Or a pet.

Which in comparison to the way Loki was treated by other people, made it tempting to believe that she might be a friend, in this otherwise unfriendly world he had been tossed into.

But Loki must never forget that she regarded him as a possession, just as everyone else did, and projecting his hopes for humanity and love onto her, would be a grave mistake. Just like it had been a mistake to even have a sliver of trust for Sif.

The family kept chatting, once Loki had put down the can of coffee and returned to kneeling next to Thor’s chair. It was only, once Loki had gotten up again, to take the used plates and cups into the kitchen, that the conversation took a turn, and the focus was directed on him.

“He’s skinny. Do you feed him enough?” Frigga asked, after having watched Loki carry the tray of dirty dishes into the kitchen, with an obvious limp.

Loki could hear Thor scoff in response.

“Trust me, mom, he’s fine. He’s emptying half the fridge while I’m at college.”

“You shouldn’t let him,” Odin pointed out, his tone firm and disapproving as it was most of the time. “He won’t respect you otherwise.”

“Well, he doesn’t respect me anyways. But that’s got nothing to do with the food.”

“Is he giving you trouble?” Now that was Frigga again, her sense of worry evident in her voice. Loki held his breath in the kitchen, where he had put down the tray on the counter.

“Yes,” Thor admitted. “And I think it’s getting worse. He’s starting to scream at me, lashing out, disobeying direct orders. I don’t know what to do about it anymore.”

“You need to show him who is in charge,” Odin said, without a trace of understanding for his son’s struggles. “If you can’t make him respect you, how can you expect to lead the company one day?”

“Well, Volstagg’s father was almost murdered by a slave who showed this exact behaviour,” Thor replied defiantly, and Loki could hear Frigga’s soft gasp in response. “He warned me about that the last time he was here to visit. He says that Loki was enslaved too late and that his training didn’t work on him.”

“You just need to man up and enforce your rules,” Odin said, unimpressed as ever. 

“How can you say that?” Frigga sounded shocked at her husband’s indifference. “Our son might be in danger and you ask for him to figure it out himself? I’ve read of a similar case in the newspaper just the other day. There’s a reason why these people are enslaved. They are likely to turn violent if left on their own. And if it’s true and Loki isn’t properly trained, Thor might be in danger.”

“Loki, get here,” Loki froze, hearing the order out of Odin’s mouth but he obeyed, stepping back into the living room and respectfully bowed his head, to the family that might currently be plotting his ruin. 

“Look at him,” Odin said, gesturing disdainfully towards the slave. “He’s a skinny little thing. You’re trying to tell me that a big strong man like you can’t keep him in check? You don’t seem to be too scared of him to fuck him.”

Faint tremors ran through Loki’s body, anger, fear, and exhaustion were making him shake but he stayed quiet and still, while three pairs of eyes were flickering towards him, critically observing him, deciding on his face.

“You remember his father is a murderer, right? He’s got homicidal tendencies just by that. You want me to fall asleep in a room with someone who might very well murder me?” Thor had his broad arms crossed over his chest. It was clear to Loki that his master wasn’t genuinely afraid of him- all he wanted was to enforce his will. 

“Why don’t you tie him up before bed then?” Odin said coldly, still entirely unimpressed.

“Dad!”

“Odin, I don’t see why you’re being like this!” Frigga said sharply and Loki risked a brief glance upwards to see that she was glaring at her husband. “I think it’s very responsible of Thor to get professionals on board when the situation makes it necessary. A CEO isn’t expected to do everything himself either. He’s just expected to hire the right people to do it.”

Odin grumbled and shook his head, saying something about a weak-willed generation but everyone pretended not to hear it.

“Fine,” He said finally, with a defeated sigh. “Do you have a certain training facility in mind?”

Thor beamed, unsurprised, and obviously pleased with the outcome of the conversation. He had never seriously considered not getting what he asked for.

“Yeah, I was thinking-“

“No,” Loki interrupted, staring directly at the people sitting in front of him, who were now all turning to look at him. 

He should know better. He knew to be quiet and obedient and to not misbehave, but he was worked up, exhausted, and hurt and he could no longer hold back. Not when his life was on the line. “You can’t do this to me. You can’t put me through this, I’m not just some broken toy to be fixed!”

The three faces of the family at the table became blurry with the angry tears flooding Loki’s eyes and he missed the smug look on Thor’s face, the scowl on Odin’s, and the worried frown on Frigga’s. 

If he did, maybe Loki would have been wise enough to shut up.

Instead, he continued, his voice shrill and erratic as his tear-blind eyes flickered from one person to the next, in search of some sympathy.

“You can’t just break me all over and then blame me for not functioning properly! You can’t- you can’t just do this to me! It’s not fair! It’s not fair and I won’t let it happen!” 

“Loki, be quiet,” Odin bellowed, but the order was lost in the raging static in Loki’s ears.

“Do you have any idea what it’s like?!” He screamed at them, accusingly pointing his finger at the family. “You’ve already taken everything from me! You dare talk about my father like you know the last thing about him! He might not be a good man, but he’s better than all of you!”

“Enough!” Thor shouted and got up from his chair suddenly, making it drop down on the floor with a loud thud that made Loki startle, and walked over towards the slave, large and menacing. Loki didn’t even consider it, didn’t even stop to think, when he reached for the knife on the table, gripping it tightly and pointing its sharp tip, at Thor, who had frozen mid-movement, staring at Loki in disbelief.

At this moment, Loki felt a thing he hadn’t felt ever since his father’s conviction.

Power.

He had stopped Thor from getting closer, from touching him, or hurting him, he had stopped this awful conversation that had been too painful for him to listen to, he might have even stopped time itself because no one moved, no one made a sound. 

And Loki got drunk off of that feeling more swiftly than he could even comprehend.

“Enough,” Loki said, a tremor creeping into his voice as he spoke. He felt like he was in a euphoric fever dream. His words were being listened to for the first time in years, he felt more powerful and more human than he could remember.

“It stops here. You can’t own me. You never did. And I demand you let me go now.” 

“You know that’s not true. Put down the knife, there’s nothing you have to gain from this,” Thor spoke without even a trace of anger in his tone, let alone fear. 

But Loki couldn’t let go of the knife. He couldn’t just give up the shred of autonomy and power he had at this moment and return to his role as an object, a toy, to be pushed around at will, even though reality was slowly starting to catch up on him and he began to grow aware of the danger he had put himself in.

Loki lowered the knife by a few inches, while still gripping it tightly.

“Thor,” His master’s name, which Loki had spoken out loud for the first time in his life had just passed Loki’s lips when an excruciating pain seized his body. Loki didn’t even have the time to scream, before he let go of the knife and dropped to the floor, stiff and spasming with the unexpected force of the electricity running through his body, scorching his veins, blinding him, deaf even to his own drawn-out scream.

Everything was aflame with lightning flashing before his unseeing eyes, then everything turned to blackness, and he sank down into the dark without resisting, like a stone dropped into a bottomless lake.

~

Loki must have been floating through that darkness for quite a while because once the world slowly reassembled around him, emerging from the quiet, numb blackness, he found that his wrists and elbows were tied together behind his back, just like his ankles and knees and once he tried to move, he found that his wrists and ankles were tied together as well, rendering him completely immobile.

Loki opened his mouth to speak, to find that he was wearing a muzzle, that locked his jaw in place, making it impossible for him to utter a word.

He was on the living room floor and above him, people were talking but his head still hurt too badly to make out the conversation. Only bits and pieces were processed in his mind, but they were enough to make him tremble in fear.

“…out of control…”

“…no time to lose…”

“…quick admission…” 

Everything was messy and blurry, but Loki knew that he was in a far worse position than where he had started out and a muffled sob left his chest.

One of the figures standing above him must have heard the sound, because they knelt down on the floor next to him, brushing his hair with surprising tenderness, that only made Loki cry all the harder.

“You’re not well, darling.”

It was Frigga’s voice, Loki realized, her gentle fingers soothing him like one would a frightened animal.

“Don’t coddle him. It’s not what he needs right now,” Odin chastised but his wife wouldn’t listen.

“He’s confused and scared,” She argued, all while still petting him and Loki wasn’t sure if he loved the rare tenderness or hated the unsolicited touch. “He’s been very upset. To reject his role so violently, he must be very ill.”

“He threatened to kill our son. You seemed to care a lot about that before.”

“I still do. And now he’s getting the care he needs,” Frigga soothingly wiped away some of the stray tears from Loki’s cheeks. “You’ll be okay, darling. You’ll get all the help you need.”

“And what about me?” Thor asked and when Loki shifted to catch a look at his face, he saw that his master looked less than pleased. The look of a child who had gotten what it wanted- but not the way he expected. 

“You’ll just have to live on your own for the rest of the semester,” Frigga said, never ceasing her gentle petting of Loki’s hair. “And after that, you could join us. We have been planning a holiday in Italy for the summer, wouldn’t it be lovely for you to come along?”

“I don’t know…” Thor said with an unhappy shrug. 

“Loki would be out of training by the time you return to your studies. That would be a good way to pass the time, wouldn’t it?” 

Thor sighed like he was the one who was suffering the most from the current situation. And his parents would probably agree.

“Maybe. I’ll ask my friends what they’ll be up to.”

“Just do that, darling.” 

“But before you talk to anyone about your holiday plans, ask Volstagg for the number of the center he told you about,” Odin said, his tone neutral, seeming entirely unimpressed by the situation. “And make sure they can take Loki off your hands as quickly as possible.”

“Can’t you call them?” Thor asked. “You’re better on the phone.”

“He’s your slave. You messed up his training, so you make the call and get this sorted out.” 

Thor looked over to his mother for support, but she averted her gaze, showing agreement with her husband.

Thor huffed but pulled his phone from his pocket to send a text to Volstagg, who luckily replied almost instantaneously. 

_Good thing you’ve taken my advice to heart. You gotta do something about it, it before it gets out of control. The center I talked about is called Institute for Behaviour Modification and Cognitive Reorganization. As I said, great results. Tell them you’re a friend of my family. We spent a lot of money there, lmao, they should remember us xD_

Thor gulped reading the message. 

Loki’s eyes were on him, he could sense it, but he couldn’t stand to look at the young man lying on the floor. It was like a survival instinct, telling him not to look down while balancing high above a yawning abyss.

The institute’s number was just one Google search away and without allowing room for any more doubts, Thor tapped the screen to call and held the phone to his ear.

Two beeps.

Then a man picked up, his voice neutral and pleasant as he spoke.

“Institute for Behaviour Modification and Cognitive Reorganization. How may I help you?”

“Uhm. My name is Thor Odinson. I’m calling about my slave, he kind of…he’s kinda lost it I guess.”

“That is not uncommon,” The voice assured him, but Thor didn’t feel very comforted. “If you are looking to plan a stay, we can offer him a spot in our treatment program within the next three months. However, if this is an emergency and you need to put him in our care more suddenly, we received a rare and unexpected cancellation today. If you can come by now, we offer to arrange your slave’s stay immediately.”

Something twisted in Thor’s chest, but he wasn’t sure what it was.

He didn’t stop to try to identify the feeling either. 

“One moment,” Thor said before he put the phone away from his ear. “Mom? Dad? They say they can take him today.”

Out of the corner of his eyes, Thor saw Loki writhing on the floor, struggling to speak through the gag, and in a moment of carelessness, Thor’s gaze flickered over to him, to see Loki’s brilliant green eyes wide and fixed on him. Even without words, it was clear that he was begging him.

Thor was fixated by Loki’s desperate gaze, the unpleasant feeling in his chest rose, threatened to spill over, but once Odin spoke up, the focus was broken, and Thor was able to look at his father instead.

“Well, that’s great,” Odin said. “Tell them you’ll drop him off.”

“That’s sooner than I expected,” Thor’s voice was unsure, and he pulled up his shoulders, then dropped them, in a helpless shrug.

“You’re no longer worried about being killed in your sleep?” Odin scoffed. “Denying the offer is no longer an option, he just threatened you with a knife.”

“Yeah, yeah I get it…” Thor shrugged again and then put the phone back to his ear, his movements automatic. “Hello? Yes. I’ll bring him over. I can be here in- uh. Where are you located again? Sorry.”

“No problem Mister Odinson. We are located in Vanaheim. We realize it’s rather remote. Depending on your location we offer a transportation service.”

“No…no, I’ll get him there, it’s only a two-hour drive.”

“Perfect. Please make sure you bring all of the necessary documents. For when may I schedule your arrival?”

“Uhm…I guess we’ll be there in two hours?”

“Wonderful. We are looking forward to meeting you. Have a pleasant drive.”

~

The drive was most definitely not pleasant.

Frigga had wanted to join but Odin had insisted that Thor should go alone. 

According to him, that was his responsibility as Loki’s owner, and this time around he didn't agree to a compromise.

He helped Thor to get Loki into the car, while Frigga packed something small to eat and something to drink for the drive but then Thor was on his own, driving through the busy roads of the city he lived in, onto the highway leading south. 

The mountain ranges in the distance grew larger the longer they drove, turning from dusky blue to grey, with snow-capped tops and patches of pine trees. 

It was a route Thor was familiar with, his parents had taken him to the mountains to learn skiing, and later, when he started taking the trip with his friends, he learned snowboarding instead. 

It would have been a nostalgic drive, through majestic nature, but the tranquillity was broken by the whimpers and sobs coming from the backseat.

Loki wouldn’t shut up, even though Thor had snapped at him twice already.

But it did nothing more than to make Loki quiet down for a few minutes before his crying started all over again. It was getting on Thor’s nerves, but he didn’t want to stop the car to deal with it. 

The sooner he’d get to the center, the better, Thor told himself.

He left the road he usually followed, when the navigation app told him to turn left, instead of right to where the most popular ski resorts were located.

Dark clouds were towering above them, covering the mountaintops, heavy with rain but the air was still dry and tense. A few kilometers away from the treatment facility, signs began to show up, to lead the way and they got closer and closer until they drove on a half-full parking lot, in front of a large complex of rectangular buildings.

The aesthetic was modern and minimalistic, and Thor might have mistaken the area for a high-end mountain lodge, if it wouldn’t have been for the high fences surrounding the area, curled razor wire was draped on top, like a dangerous snake, breaking the illusion of a holiday getaway. 

Thor looked back over his shoulder and was shocked to see that Loki’s puffy, red eyes bore right into him with an eerie intensity, the undisguised hatred in them made a shiver trickle down his spine.

“You know that’s not the way I wanted it to go,” Thor tried to explain himself. “But you literally threatened me with a knife in front of my parents. Not your smartest move. You didn’t give me any choice at all. But now we’re here. And maybe it is for the better after all, don’t you think?”

Loki still just stared at him. Thor’s excuses had done nothing to extinguish the cold fire in his eyes.

But why did he even bother to justify himself in front of his slave? 

Thor felt a surge of anger wash through him because Loki wouldn’t even try to see his point of view. He had just humiliated himself by trying to explain something that Loki didn’t even bother to understand. 

He huffed as he left the car and opened the door to get Loki out as well. The young man kicked and struggled, but it was more for show than anything else.

He was exhausted and weak, and Thor had no problem dragging him inside to the reception. 

The rooms were white and brightly lit, people in pretentious white coats were walking around, reading through files or talking to one another, barely even sparing a glance towards them, as Thor lead Loki, who had started crying again, through the lobby. 

“I’m Thor Odinson,” He said when he reached the reception desk. “I’m here with Loki. I was told I could come here now.”

“Mister Odinson, we are very pleased to see you here,” A middle-aged woman with a cold smile greeted him. “I can take Loki with me right away. You arrived just in time for him to join the evening's training routine. In the meantime, you can talk to Miss Romanoff, who will tell you all about our program. My colleague will show you the way.”

Thor stopped. 

This was all happening so much faster than he expected and there was no room for him to voice his doubts without feeling stupid, so he didn’t. 

He wanted to say something else to Loki, something comforting, but the slave didn’t deserve it anyway, so he didn’t do that either.

He just allowed for the woman to take Loki with her, ignoring the pleading, frightened look his slave shot him when the stranger hooked a leash to his collar and started to lead him away.

Thor just looked away and didn’t turn back, when another employee asked him to follow.

Relief washed over him, as Loki's crying grew quieter. 

It was for the better this way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so here's the next chapter! It got kind of long, so I divided it into two chapters and I'll be posting the next one sometime later today.
> 
> So, this is another glimpse of the reality in this fic. It's been hinted at before and now it's happening...poor Loki...but for all the people, who enjoyed that Loki was being so "in character" he won't simply be turned into a replaceable husk, even though things will change for him. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed reading and as always I love hearing your thoughts and ideas!


	5. Chapter 5

“Do you agree to the use of psychoactive drugs?”

The woman who had joined him in the bland office a few minutes after Thor had gotten seated, had been asking him questions for the past half hour and she still seemed nowhere near done. 

She was beautiful, but her expression was cold, red hair combed back into a tight braid. She had introduced herself as Miss Romanoff and her handshake had been almost painfully tight.

“Uhm, I don’t know,” Thor shrugged. “What for?”

“We mostly use them as a key element in our conditioning process. The drugs we use aren’t designed to be addictive if that’s what you worry about. I recommend you agree to get the results you want in the time you requested.”

“Okay. Then yes.”

Thor shifted uncomfortably in his chair as the woman wrote down his answer.

“Do you have any specific training goals you want your slave to achieve?”

“It would be great if he stopped wanting to murder me?” Thor shot the woman in front of him a lopsided smile, but her expression remained neutral.

“That is standard of course. Do you want him to be affectionate, productive, more pain tolerant, by the end of his stay?”

“No,” Thor was dazzled by the options to choose from. “No, I think it’s fine, I liked the way things were. He talks back a lot but-“

“You want him to stop talking back to you?” Miss Romanoff lifted a brow.

“Yeah…yeah, I guess. It’s annoying.”

“Understandably so. Are there specific skills you want your slave to improve upon?”

“I don’t think so. He’s been doing everything pretty well.”

Miss Romanoff snorted like Thor had said something amusing, which made the young man all the more uncomfortable. 

“We believe that everything can be improved upon. May I recommend our training module for pleasure slaves? It can be included in the program free of charge. And I believe that’s his main use, isn’t it?”

Thor’s cheeks flushed a little and he nodded.

“Sure. Why not?”

“Wonderful,” The woman said coolly. “Our standard procedure, and my recommendation, is to strengthen the bond between you and your slave, to dissolve aggressive tendencies. Since you won’t be here most of the time, we will take some pictures and a short video of you for that purpose. Please sign here, to agree with our data protection regulations.”

Thor signed, without reading the paper he was handed.

“And that means he won’t try to attack me anymore?”

“Of course not,” Miss Romanoff seemed mildly offended to even be asked such an obvious question. “Quite the opposite is true.”

At Thor’s silence, she went on speaking.

“You don’t seem convinced? We have data to prove that upon their release slaves are-“

“No, that’s not it,” Thor sighed. “I just think that I probably should have gotten this under control on my own, you see?”

“Mister Odinson, studies by our institute show that slaves have a criminal potential over fifty times higher than that of the average citizen. It’s the reason they are in captivity after all. Keeping that potential from unfolding is a complicated process and often requires a team of professionals. You made the right decision by bringing him here.”

Hearing that made some of the unpleasant heaviness in Thor’s chest dissolve and he could breathe a bit more freely again.

Loki was the son of a convicted murderer. There was a reason for his enslavement, and it wasn’t Thor’s fault that he had ended up here- on the opposite, he had done the only right thing by putting Loki back into training. 

“Thank you,” Thor said, sounding more genuine than he wanted to let on, not that it seemed to impress the cold-eyed redhead in front of him in the slightest.

“Of course. Do you have any further questions you want me to answer to you?”

“Yeah, just…how is this going to look like?”

“Depending on the preferences you have just shared with me, we will set together a complex routine, based on a highly advanced model for positive and negative reinforcement. We might use certain drugs, or sensory deprivation to reach training goals. Ideas of observational learning also play a big part and we use educative movies to encourage the desired behaviour,” Miss Romanoff’s explanations were making Thor dizzy, but he nodded his head like he understood every word she said nonetheless. 

“But we pride ourselves in working on the core issues as well, which we treat in one-on-one sessions. The goal is to achieve a sense of acceptance of their lives, which will keep them from lashing out at random. After all, a large part of the problem is confusion and a lack of adaptability. A lot of the slaves I work with tell me about ludicrous ideas, entirely out of touch with reality.”

“Wow that’s-“ Thor cleared his throat while looking for the right thing to say. “That sounds pretty impressive.”

“It is,” Miss Romanoff agreed with a nod of her head. “I can show you more of our facility, on our way to Loki’s ward. I recommend you say goodbye to him. Since an emotional bond is what we’re aiming for, it’s important for him to know that you will be back.”

“Yeah, I guess that would make sense,” Thor said, and when Miss Romanoff got up, he did the same and followed her outside.

“Our facility is large enough to treat over two hundred slaves at once, which is a small number in comparison to the standard training centres, which might take over a thousand individuals. However, our treatment concept is more advanced and customizable, based on our client’s wishes and the slave’s behavioural problems,” Miss Romanoff went on to explain, as she led the way through the brightly lit corridors, her shoes clicking on the linoleum. 

“Great,” Thor didn’t care much about the technical details. He just wanted to drive back home as quickly as possible. This place was beginning to make him uncomfortable and the idea of having to face Loki again made his stomach twist in an entirely unpleasant way.

“You might have noticed the different buildings from the outside. Each one of them means a different step in the treatment program, from permanent supervision to almost complete autonomy. After all, I doubt you have the time to supervise your slave all the time in your everyday life.”

“No, of course not,” Thor snorted. 

They walked a bit further before Miss Romanoff opened a door on their right to reveal a row of six capsules, standing next to each other menacingly, giving off no sound but a low, nerve grating buzz. They were made of chrome, over two meters in size, and had nonsensical lights flickering on them. 

“These are our sensory deprivation tanks,” Romanoff went on to explain, not realizing that Thor was growing sick of her explanations. “They’re filled with a salt solution, allowing for a floating sensation and kept at body temperature, while being perfectly sound and lightproof. Especially on very defiant slaves with deeply rooted misconceptions about their lives, they are very effective. Just a few hours, makes any kind of slave significantly more reactive to all kinds of treatment, allowing for a quicker training process.”

For a moment Thor stared at the capsules and something sour rose in the back of his throat. He swallowed it back down.

“Miss, I don’t want to be rude, but I don’t care how your training works. I just want it to work, okay?”

“Of course,” Miss Romanoff didn’t seem to take the slightest offense and just closed the door to the room again. “This way. Loki should be in his room right now.”

The rest of the walk was spent in silence, they left the main building to walk across a path towards one of the smaller houses at the far back, an ugly cement block, just like all the rest with a large 1 painted on to it with dark grey paint.

Miss Romanoff swiped her card and pressed her thumb against a small screen next to the door before a green light flickered to allow them inside. Rows of doors left and right greeted them but Miss Romanoff seemed to know her way around well enough. 

She unlocked one of the doors at the end of the corridor to reveal a tiny, bland room, windowless with a thin mat on the floor and on top of the mat, was Loki, blending perfectly into the neutral colours of the room, with his paper white-skin and inky hair.

Only his brilliant eyes defied the black and white colour scheme.

He was dressed in a fresh set of clothes, a short-sleeved shirt, and some jogging pants. He was no longer tied up and the muzzle had been removed, but he made no move to attack either of them, just like he didn’t speak and instead kept his lips firmly pressed together.

Thor glanced over at Miss Romanoff for help but she didn’t say or do anything.

Once more today, he was on his own.

“Uh. Yeah, I’m going to go now. Back home,” Thor explained awkwardly and rubbed the back of his neck. “I think the people here- well it seems like they’re really great. They know what they’re doing. And uhm. I’ll be back. I’ll come for- training intervals like once a month. And then by the end of all of this, you’ll come back home with me, okay?”

“I’d rather die,” Loki spat out at him, shooting him a glare so full of hatred and disgust that Thor took a small step back. Not that there was much space to move in the tiny room. 

“Sure, that’s not an option,” Thor shrugged. “You’re pretty confused. I think this will be good.”

“I hate you,” Loki said, and Thor looked over at Romanoff, waiting for her to do something but she didn’t. “Every day I spend here, I’ll wish for you to rot in hell until I get back, then I’ll put you there myself!” 

Thor stared back at Loki dumbfounded. His slave had always been provocative and disrespectful, but he had never spoken to him like that.

 _No one_ had ever spoken to him like that.

“Don’t worry Mister Odinson. Loki won’t make true on his promise. Instead, I think he will be begging to serve you again,” Romanoff said coolly. “Let’s leave it here.”

She opened the door and Thor was only too glad to leave the depressingly small room and Loki in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo, here we go, with some insight into the working of the institution. I was planning to move onto the next part of the story and not explicitly focus on the time Loki spends in the institution, unless you want to read about it?
> 
> I'm still a bit undecided, so while I can't make a certain promise, I'd love to hear your opinions about it or even some ideas you might have!


	6. Chapter 6

The last few months had been hard, admittedly.

Thor had failed a few of his courses that semester, despite his best efforts and his father had gotten pretty angry at him because of it, making all kinds of threats about cutting off Thor’s money supply. But thankfully Frigga had been able to calm him down.

The money never stopped coming.

And Thor didn’t particularly care about the failed courses. After all, he quite enjoyed college and he didn’t mind doing a few semesters longer to get his degree.

The true problem was the housekeeping. 

At first, it didn’t bother him at all. Thor had just ordered takeout instead of cooking and with his friends almost constantly over at his apartment, he barely even noticed that Loki wasn’t there. But after a while, when the apartment got so messy that even Thor was bothered enough to do something about it when he got sick of eating pizza and Chinese food and his friends had to stay home to learn for their finals, the situation started to suck.

The apartment was dirty, there was so much that needed to be done and everything was too quiet all the time.

There was no Loki there to talk to, to cook and clean for him, to pleasure him.

He had some one-night stands to make up for the lack of company and it was fun. Thor’s charm and his good looks made it easy for him to get whoever he wanted. And the people he brought home were usually fresh, and exciting, and good in bed.

But they weren’t like Loki.

Loki had not only known exactly what Thor wanted he had also never refused him. And if so, Thor had just used force to get what he wanted.

He couldn’t do that with his college flings. Unlike Loki, they had their own needs, limits, and demands towards Thor and they wouldn’t just let him go ahead with whatever he wanted, which was frustrating, to say the least. The endless discussions, the compromises, over and over again- it got annoying after a while.

Another inconvenience was the monthly training interval. The institute expected him to take an entire day to partake in training and along with the drive to get there and back, it was a rather lengthy affair, especially when he could have used the time to do work for college or to relax.

The first time he revisited the institute, Loki refused to talk or look at him. He kept his gaze lowered the entire time and did everything he was told, with only a few moments of hesitation every now and again, which were immediately punished without exception.

Romanoff was there for the entire time and she taught Thor a lot about how to give orders, how to choose punishments and rewards and when to give them. 

She called that reinforcement and introduced him to the basic concepts of how to model his slave’s behaviour. It made a lot of sense to Thor, who in hindsight saw all the mistakes he had made as a master. He had humoured Loki too often, been too inconsistent or unclear in his authority.

The second time Thor got back to the institute Loki was glad to see him. 

He wept when Thor entered the room and eagerly fulfilled all the test tasks he was given, glancing back at Thor for approval regularly. 

Thor was shocked by the difference but also incredibly pleased. 

The sweet Loki of his dreams was beginning to show, one who sought affirmation and leaned into his touch and followed every command to the smallest detail. 

It was easy not to think about how that change might have happened, because frankly, Thor didn’t care. 

This was the Loki he wanted, and he even asked Romanoff if he could take Loki back with him right now because he was so pleased with the results. At the idea of going back home, Loki’s eyes grew wide, genuine longing in them, but he didn’t dare to open his mouth to beg.

Romanoff had shaken her head and the hopeful expression slid off of Loki’s face, which turned neutral and controlled once more.

The results were there but more time was necessary to make sure they would stick.

Thor agreed reluctantly.

Just before he was about to leave, Romanoff addressed Loki directly.

“Isn’t there something you want to tell your Master?” 

Loki didn’t need to be asked twice. There was no trace of Loki’s usual prideful demeanour and the words tumbled out of his mouth with graceless desperation.

“I’m sorry. I apologize for attacking and threatening you. I apologize for my talking back and my disrespect. You’ve been good to me, and I have been ungrateful and bad. I’m so, so sorry. I shouldn’t have…I should have never. I was wrong. And I- I understand if you don’t want me anymore.”

This wasn’t like Loki’s well-instrumented manipulations, meant to get himself leverage. This was raw and heartfelt, and hit Thor right in the chest. He had never seen Loki like this.

Thor had looked over at Romanoff, unsure as to how to react, while Loki had been kneeling on the floor, trembling as he awaited his master’s decision. At her encouraging nod, Thor told Loki that he was forgiven and that he still wanted him. 

Loki started crying with relief and gratitude then and he didn’t stop by the time Thor left, muttering a broken string of thank-yous until Romanoff told him to be quiet. 

There was no third visit, even though it was scheduled. 

Thor had decided to accompany his parents to Italy, to get out of his wretched apartment and during their six-week trip through the Toscana, through Rome and Sicily, there was only a video call with Romanoff, who kept him up to date with Loki’s training and gave him more advice about how to handle his slave in the future.

It was briefly after Thor had gotten back from his holidays that he got to pick up Loki from the facility, just a few days before the start of his semester. 

Loki was elevated to see him.

He politely thanked Romanoff and her team for the time and effort spent on him and thanked Thor for taking him back home. 

During the car ride, he was quiet and well behaved, keeping his gaze down for most of the ride, despite the magnificent landscape they passed.

Only when Thor allowed him to look out of the window, Loki lifted his eyes and looked outside. The villages and forests they passed seemed to be a great pleasure to him, which Thor was happy to indulge him in.

After all, Romanoff had told him, that indulgence and praise had their place if they were paired with the right authority. 

Once they got to the flat, the moment the apartment door closed behind them, Thor bent Loki over the couch and fucked him long and hard, reclaiming that beautiful, lithe body.

Loki took it beautifully, without question, without complaint and Thor came hard enough to make him dizzy.

Then Loki went on to clean the entire apartment. He vacuumed and mopped floors, cleared the tables, cleaned the windows, did the dishes, and scrubbed the bathroom. And once he was done with that, he politely asked Thor, if he may warm his cock, while he was watching TV.

Thor agreed, but he couldn’t hold back for long. His cock hardened quickly in Loki’s eager mouth and soon he was fucking his face with reckless abandon. He found that Loki’s throat opened up to him in a wondrous effortlessness, no matter how hard he fucked in, Loki stayed opened around him, never choked or tried to get away. 

Looking down into his slave’s, tear-filled green eyes was what sent Thor over the edge with a long groan.

Loki swallowed and held his softening cock in his mouth without complaint, a tranquil expression taking over his face, as Thor turned on the TV and absent-mindedly petted his pretty, ebony hair, which was silky and smooth like never before.

Loki didn’t move until Thor told him to make dinner, then he got up, wiped the drool off his chin, and went to the kitchen to make a wonderfully homely stew, the smell of it spread from the kitchen into the rest of the flat, making Thor’s mouth water.

Thor wasn’t sure if he should ever admit to something like this, but the thought crossed his mind, that only now that Loki was back, his apartment felt like home again.

~

_Repetition._

_This place would be nothing if it wasn’t for stone-cold, unforgiving repetition._

_The first time Loki had scoffed watching the little propaganda movies, they were shown each night. They were plain and shallow, easy to see through, and mostly just consisted of simple scenes._

_A slave dropped a cup. He was slapped._

_A slave gave a blowjob. She got her hair petted._

_A slave tried running away. She got shocked._

_A slave pushed his master away. He was whipped._

_Sometimes a voice even narrated the scenes, like they were too stupid to comprehend what they saw._

_‘Sonja talked back to her master. Her master is angry. Sonja is a bad slave. Her master is spanking her. Sonja deserves this. She is a bad slave.”_

_It was obvious to see what the movies were supposed to do. But with time Loki felt himself becoming affected by them, especially when the collar around his throat was starting to give small but painful shocks whenever one of the slaves in the movies did a mistake._

_He was made to watch the films over and over again until he flinched when he witnessed a rule being broken, even before the actual shock came._

_The tapes worked in much the same way._

_For over a month, every evening after their scarce dinner Loki was given an injection before he was left alone in his room._

_For a few minutes nothing happened, then through invisible speakers in the walls, a recording of Thor’s voice was reading simple statements to him, for hours on end, often going on for long after he had fallen asleep._

_There were two kinds of injections as well as two kinds of tapes and Loki would only find out which one it was going to be that night, when he was alone in his room, with his hands tied above his head, so he wouldn’t cover his ears._

_One injection made a pleasant feeling of warmth and happiness spread throughout his entire body. He lay on his mat shivering uncontrollably with pleasure and joy, while his invisible master’s voice spoke words of praise to him._

_‘You are a good slave. You did well. You are a sweet slave. What a pretty slave you are. Good boy. Just like that. You are so pretty. I am happy with you.’_

_During those moments, it was hard to recognize what was happening to him as torture. In years he hadn’t felt as happy as he did listening to Thor’s disembodied voice speaking to him._

_But the next morning, when the drugs had worn off, he told himself that the treatment didn’t affect him, that he was too smart to fall for a trick so cheap._

_The effects of the second injection were a stark contrast to the warm, joy-filled hours the first gave him. Minutes after the drug’s effects unfolded in his system cramps took over his body. His stomach turned into a painful knot, stabs of sharp pain shot through him like he was being stabbed with icy daggers._

_He writhed on the bed with desperate whimpers and cries leaving his body, while his master’s voice spoke to him throughout his agony._

_‘Stop. You are a bad slave. I am disappointed in you. You did bad. Not like that. Shut up. You are useless. I don’t want you anymore. You are stupid. You disobeyed.’_

_And even though Loki knew exactly what was happening throughout the entire time, he soon noticed that it didn’t make the procedure any less effective. The words turned from harmless sounds into powerful weapons within his mind until the mere idea of hearing them either elated or scared him._

_But as the treatment went on, something even worse happened._

_He became too weary to question what happened._

_And in time, he even forgot, what it was like to not shiver in fear at the idea of displeasing his master._

“Loki? Get here.”

Loki immediately forgot what he had been thinking about and let go of the pot he had been scrubbing in the kitchen. He went to the living room, where his master was waiting for him.

A few weeks had passed, since he had left the facility and they had settled into a steady routine during this time. Loki fulfilled his duties, he pleased his master as best as he could and took his rightful punishment for whenever he failed to do what he was asked to.

All of that worked best with an empty head.

It was better not to think about anything too much. He knew that would only make it harder on himself.

And what was there to think about anyways?

In countless talks, Miss Romanoff had proven to him, that his thoughts about his own superiority, his memories, the scenarios he pictured about what could have been, were feeble illusions, meant to distract himself from the fact, that this was who he was always meant to be.

And in time, he found truth in her words.

And a while after that, he even found comfort.

Loki realized that he was too unstable to live an autonomous life. He would have never been able to take the pressure of going to college, he would have failed miserably at the simplest tasks and would have taken his father’s route in life, drinking and gambling until he was reduced to a wreck. 

Then he would waste away the rest of his life, in some prison facility, where he would not be granted any of the joy and kindness his master gave to him.

Thor provided for him, he gave him a place to live, food, clothes, protection, and beyond that a purpose in life.

It was so much more than Loki would have been granted if he had been on his own and slowly, hesitantly, a shy flower of gratitude bloomed within Loki, stretching out towards the warm sun, that was Thor.

Loki was motivated to do the best he could possibly do and in response, Thor was kind and benevolent to him, more so than ever before.

Thor watched movies with him, allowed him to eat from the same food he did and when Loki had been especially good, he was even allowed to sleep next to his master, in his bed.

Everything was going so well.

It must only be due to his broken nature, that Loki was swallowed up by a deep sadness every now and again.

Loki had made his way to the living room, where Thor was sitting on the couch, balancing his laptop on his legs, with his feet resting on the coffee table. Loki was vaguely aware, that this would have been something that would have aggravated him before, but now he could see nothing wrong with his master’s behaviour.

He would just have to clean the table all over again, but that was what he was here for. 

“Hey Loki,” Thor briefly looked up at him and shoot him a charming smile, that made Loki feel warm all over. Loki answered it with a shy smile of his own. “I just finished this essay. Go ahead and polish it up a bit.”

Loki’s smile slipped off his face, the warmth replaced by a feeling of cold dread. He was ordered to do something that went against the basic principles he had gone through so much pain to learn over the past few months.

Never question your master. Never correct your master. He knows better than you do.

“I’m sorry master,” Loki lowered his head to show his submission. “I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

“Wait, what?” Thor looked back at him, genuinely confused and Loki shifted uncomfortably where he was standing.

“I’m sorry, I mean no disrespect. But I could never…I am unfit to correct any of your work. It would mean questioning your superiority and I would never…please. I’m sorry,” Loki stumbled over his own words, trying to make his master understand why it had been wrong of him to ever correct him.

“You’re smart,” Thor stated blandly. “That’s why I bought you. To help me with my homework.”

Loki’s stomach twisted painfully, and he lowered his head even further.

“I’m sorry. I’d be glad to read through your paper for you, but I don’t think I have anything of value to add to it.”

“That’s bullshit!” Thor shouted, making Loki flinch. “Of course, you can do my damn paper! You always did!”

Automatically, Loki slipped down on his knees, pressing his forehead against the floor, in a desperate attempt to make himself smaller, to show that he had not forgotten his place by denying his master. His stomach was cramping painfully now, with fear and the heavy sorrow that came with displeasing his master.

“I’m sorry,” He whispered, unsure of what else to say.

But the apology didn’t soothe his master’s temper.

“Get up,” Thor ordered coldly, and Loki was unable to disobey. He got up like a puppet drawn on strings. Thor handed him the laptop and Loki took it like he was supposed to. “And now fix my paper for me.”

Loki sat down on the floor, with the laptop resting on his knees, and stared at the screen. The words became blurry with tears, which he roughly wiped away and tried to focus. 

He read through the paper, just like he was ordered to, his stomach still upset by the looming threat of Thor’s anger.

“You’re not making any changes,” Thor pointed out hardly after Loki had read a few pages.

“There’s nothing I could correct,” Loki said, a tremor making his voice unsteady, as his eyes flickered fearfully towards Thor. “I believe it’s good, master.”

“Bullshit! You never leave the paper the way it is, you always change something!” Thor got off the couch, stomping down with his foot like an angry child. “You’re not even trying!”

A tear dropped down on the keyboard and Loki anxiously wiped it away. He opened his mouth to say something, anything that would help Thor understand why Loki _could not_ do what was asked of him. 

But only two words squeezed out of his tight throat and he already knew that they would do nothing to help him.

“I’m sorry.”

Thor stayed silent for a while, but Loki could feel his fiery gaze on his bowed back.

“I can’t believe that I have to put up with this after everything. Get me the paddle.”

“Of course, master,” Loki scrambled to get up. He put the laptop down on the coffee table and hurried to get the paddle and brought it back to Thor, whose sunny expression had turned dark and stormy over the course of the past few minutes.

Loki handed Thor the paddle, then bent over the couch like he was supposed to.

He was grateful for the opportunity to prove himself. While he was incapable of doing what Thor had asked him, he was capable of taking a punishment and he would gladly do so if it would make Thor any less upset with him.

But after twenty harsh blows, hard enough to make Loki’s knees threaten to give out and after Loki had thanked his master for correcting him, the problem was not resolved.

Waves of anger still radiated off of Thor, making Loki shiver and tremble, the pain of his ass rivaling the cruel cramps in his stomach.

Thor put aside the paddle and ordered Loki to stand up straight, which he did, without looking his master in the eye.

“And now fix the paper,” Thor ordered, his arms crossed over his broad chest.

Loki almost broke down, when he was forced to repeat the only answer he knew how to give.

“I’m sorry, master. I can’t.”

Thor let go of an angry shout, kicking the coffee table hard enough to make it fall over along with the laptop. 

“I thought they fixed you!” Thor shouted, making Loki flinch and lower himself to his knees again, in the only appropriate response he could muster when confronted with his master’s rage. “You were supposed to be done acting up!”

“I’m sorry master,” Loki whispered brokenly.

“Stop saying you’re sorry, it makes me want to- ugh!”

Loki quickly shut up. 

Thor didn’t say anything for a few minutes, just paced restlessly through the room.

“I’ll call Romanoff about this,” Thor finally decided. “You stay where you are. I’m not done with you.”

~

“Romanoff, who am I speaking to?”

The cool voice on the other end of the line, did nothing to calm Thor’s raging temper and his hand tightened dangerously on his phone.

He was in his bedroom now, while Loki was still cowering in the living room like he had no idea what he had done wrong.

“You broke my slave!”

Silence.

“Mister Odinson, is that you?”

“Yes! You broke him. He doesn’t do what he’s supposed to.”

“That’s impossible. He reacted well to the treatment,” Romanoff said, perfectly unbothered. “What seems to be the issue?”

“I gave him a simple request and he refused to do as he was told. You promised me this wouldn’t happen again!”

“What was the request?”

“I wanted him to fix my essay,” Thor huffed. “He always does that.”

On the other side of the line, Romanoff snorted, like Thor had said something idiotic.

“Of course, he can’t obey this order. It stands against the very basics of his conditioning. He couldn’t be ordered to hurt you either or to needlessly damage your property. His brain short-circuits in those situations,” Romanoff explained. “The fact that you’re superior to him, is more fundamental to him now, than the fact that the sky is blue.”

Thor stopped, dumbfounded. 

“…so you’re saying he can’t fix my essay?”

“No, he can’t,” Romanoff explained, seeming exasperated at Thor’s slow wit. “It said so in the information papers for the training cycle we gave you. I assume you never read them?”

“Uhm, no?”

Romanoff sighed.

“In those papers, it states, that training for cognitively challenging tasks, like help with work or school, is an extra training module, that we offer upon request. It is difficult and takes more time, to train a slave to perfect submission and obedience, while still encouraging them to do tasks that might lead them to believe that they are in any way superior to their masters,” Romanoff explained in her usual cold and technical way, that made Thor respect and despise her at once.

“So, what do I do now?” He asked.

“We offer follow-up training or refreshment of previous training cycles. You are welcome to return Loki to our facility, I assume a spot will be free in the next three months. The training you’re asking for will probably take about two months.”

“But my paper is due tonight!”

“Well, I can’t help you with that,” Romanoff said unapologetically. “You will have to get help elsewhere. Now more importantly, how did you react to Loki’s inability to fulfill his task?”

“I gave him a beating,” Thor said, confident that he had made the right call.

But Romanoff’s groan proved him wrong.

“You’re messing up his conditioning!” She snapped, showing emotion for the very first time since they had gotten to know each other. Her handiwork was at risk and she took that personally. “You punished him for something that he’s explicitly _supposed_ to do. He’s probably terribly confused right now. Looking for an answer. In the worst case, he might question the conditioning itself.”

“Uhm, sorry about that,” Thor said, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck. “What do I do about it?”

“You go back to him and tell him the phrases we told you. Comfort him and tell him that it was a test and that he passed. You’re proud of him, all of that. Then his conditioning isn’t at immediate risk anymore, he won’t get the time to question his thinking patterns enough to do serious damage.”

“So, I should just coddle him for disobeying my orders?”

Thor heard Romanoff cuss under her breath, in a foreign language.

“No. You be nice to him, for doing exactly what he was supposed to. Slaves are proven to be a lot more emotionally unstable than the average citizen. A serious disruption can lead them to drastic actions. So, if you want for your toy to stay healthy, alive and within your care, you should do as I told you.”

“Okay,” Thor finally admitted. “So…I’ll just go ahead and do that. Thanks.”

Romanoff sighed.

“You’re welcome. Now get moving.”

Then she hung up and Thor was left with nothing else to do, than exactly what she had told him. He returned to the living room, to see Loki, huddled up on the floor, shivering uncontrollably and crying softly, whispering to himself so quietly that Thor could not understand what he was saying. 

With the anger dissipating like morning fog, Thor suddenly felt bad for him.

Very bad. Like the day he had brought Loki to the facility. But just like that day, he pushed the feeling away, without taking a closer look at what it might be.

“Loki?” Thor asked, and watched as the slave lifted his head, to briefly look back at him out of tear-filled eyes. Thor gulped and knelt down next to him, offering him his usual, charming smile, when Loki’s body tensed beside him. “You passed the test. You did great.”

“…I…what?” 

“Me asking you to fix my essay. It was a test. To see if you were truly cured of your old ways,” Thor said, and if he was bad at lying, Loki was so eager to believe, that he drank the words up like water. 

“Master…” He whispered, his shoulders slumping down, as some of the tension released from his body.

“Come on, get here,” Thor patted his thigh and Loki didn’t need to be told twice, to change his position and lie his head on Thor’s leg, allowing his master to pet his hair. “You’re so good, darling. You’re so sweet…took your punishment so well and still didn’t crack. I’m so proud.”

“Th-thank you,” Loki breathed out, a pleasant shiver running through his body at the praise, as he leaned into Thor’s gentle touch. Like a love-starved little puppy.

“How about I order some pizza tonight, hm? You won’t have to cook. You’ll even get one of your own,” Thor said benevolently, taken over by the sudden need to be nice and caring towards this poor little creature. He might be useless in helping him with his schoolwork now…but Thor much preferred a sweet little thing crying in his lap, over a feisty slave giving him a hard time.

Loki was so grateful, that he started crying again, fighting to speak, as he pressed a kiss to Thor’s clothed leg.

“Thank you. Thank you master…” Loki whispered, genuinely overcome by gratitude. A shaky breath. Another kiss. Then he added in a quiet voice: “I love you, master.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this is bad in a whole new way, yay? Loki's changed significantly while Thor has stayed...well exactly the same.   
> I really hope you still enjoyed reading, even though the story took a different turn from the way it started. Your lovely comments always motivate me and I love to read about all of your ideas and thoughts!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter focuses on some serious mental health issues and they are treated carelessly and completely incorrectly, so please check the updated tags if this might be unsettling to you! Take care and if you have any doubts you can read up a brief summary of the chapter in the notes at the end.

_Loki opened his mouth without resistance and allowed the nurse to place a round yellow pill on the tip of his tongue._

_He swallowed it obediently, then opened his mouth once more, to allow the nurse’s fingers, covered by rubber gloves, to search his mouth, to make sure he hadn’t kept the pill somewhere._

_The injections were a thing of the past now and the bruises that the needles had left were beginning to fade. Ever since he had moved onto stage three of his training, Loki was deemed obedient enough to take his drugs orally._

_They were right in their assessment of course._

_Sometimes the thought of biting the hand-shoed fingers in his mouth, or to spit out the pill crossed his mind, but it was only a flickering impulse, rather than a serious contemplation and he felt bad about it immediately after._

_These people were taking care of him, after all._

_Of course, they couldn’t take the role of his master, but they were acting on Thor’s behalf and that alone made Loki owe them respect and gratitude._

_And now that he was past the beginning stages of his training, his life here had gotten a lot more pleasant. A lot more tolerable._

_He was past having to be taught the basic principles between good and bad, they were solid now, firmly anchored as indisputable facts in his mind, and only needed to be reinforced intermittently every now and again._

_With that as a basis, Loki was ready to learn specific tasks, mainly how to pleasure his master. Loki was glad for it because it gave him back worth, a purpose, and the training process was far more pleasant than his first few weeks at the institute had been._

_Now he was mainly spared from the bad drugs, that made him break out in a cold sweat, cramping and shivering for hours on end, and instead, he was allowed the warm, euphoric pleasure of the good drugs almost daily. By now, Loki felt the warm tingle of excitement long before the pill dissolved in his stomach and got a chance to unfold its effects._

_As the nurse took a hold of his leash and guided him towards the main building of the facility, Loki wondered what he might get to do today._

_Sometimes he got to suck off employees, who called themselves trainers, who corrected and improved his performance with detailed feedback, praise, and punishment until they were pleased with it and he was pleased too because he knew that his master would enjoy all the new tricks he learned._

_This was the technical side of things and it required active participation, he needed to try hard to avoid punishment. But sometimes all that he was expected to do, was to lie there and take it, focus on the sensation, as the effects of the drug made him feel so incredibly good._

_He got to suckle on a pecker gag for hours on end, merely learning to enjoy the feeling of having his mouth filled. Even when the dildo was long enough to touch the back of his throat and he was made to choke and gag, even as his jaws began to ache badly, he was still shivering with pleasure the whole time through._

_Sometimes it was confusing, the pain and the pleasure being turned into one, inseparable. Once he was tied to a sybian and it fucked him until sharp pain was shooting through his body and he cried through the gag, but that didn’t stop the drug from making him feel so incredibly good, that he welcomed every thrust._

_And now, that he considered the option of the sybian, he even felt excited at the idea that this might be his task for today._

_Or maybe, if he was lucky, he would get fucked by the handsome trainer, who had taught him how to ride his cock a few days ago. He was tall and strong and had blonde hair, that reminded Loki so much of his master, even if he was only a poor replacement, that would leave him as soon as the training ended._

_Loki missed Thor dearly, and it grew worse every day. The staff at the facility took care of him and he was grateful for that, as he was supposed to, but they never showed him any bit of kindness, never smiled at him, the way Thor did and Loki felt incredibly alone, while being fully aware that he had no one to blame but himself, for being here, away from his master._

_How could he have been so blind not to realize that Thor had been the only good thing he had ever had in his life?_

_Loki tried not to think about it. It was too painful. Instead, he focused on the present moment, returned his thought to the trainer he was hoping to be allowed to pleasure today. But when the nurse guiding him opened the door to one of the rooms, the trainer in question wasn’t there._

_Instead, there was a woman sitting on a chair in the middle of the room. She wore the same attire as the rest of the staff and once they entered the room, she spread her legs, revealing the wet folds of her cunt, making it glaringly obvious what would be expected of him._

_Loki took a step backwards, trying to move away, but the nurse who had guided him here gave him a firm push towards the middle of the room._

_But Loki was frozen in place and refused to move closer toward the trainer waiting for him, he just stared at her in utter shock, while his pulse quickened to the point of making him dizzy._

_“No,” The word slipped past his lips, without him realizing it, a word that he hadn’t spoken in weeks. A word he wasn't supposed to say._

_Loki wanted to be good. He knew, that to be good, he would need to get on his knees and pleasure the woman in front of him- but he couldn’t._

_Something reached for him, dragged him under, to a dark place, where he couldn’t breathe, where he was split open, flashes of agony coursed through him and he couldn’t move away, he couldn’t do anything but to lick and suck the cunt above him, hoping against hope, that maybe it would be enough to be spared from the pain- and all he wanted to do now, was to get out of this room, far far away._

_The punishment for his resistance was bad._

_But instead of forcing him to pleasure the woman, he was removed from the situation and gradually reintroduced to the task. Every time he went to see the female trainer, he got to take two of the yellow pills, instead of just one, in an attempt to erase the traumatic memory and recondition him to enjoy the act._

_It hardly worked._

_Even after multiple repetitions, he never reached the same enthusiasm he did with other tasks, and every now and again he still slipped into a panic and tried to fight back._

_After a while, the team begrudgingly decided to stop their efforts of trying to make him genuinely enjoy eating a woman out. Instead, they settled for making Loki tolerate it and to perfect his technique._

_But the horror, that came with the sensation of it, never quite let go of Loki, even though he learned how to hide it well._

Loki blinked, willing away the memories of his time at the institute. They didn’t matter. 

He was here now. Right where he was supposed to be, waiting for his master.

Loki shifted on his aching knees, where he was waiting by the door. He wore one of the cute little silk slips Thor liked on him and he had put the nipple clamps on himself, hoping that it would please his master.

The hours trickled by slowly, and the shadows crawled across the floor, as Loki waited.

Thor should have been home a long time ago. On Thursdays, his courses ended at two pm and he was usually home by three. Four, if he went to have lunch with his friends.

But it was almost six already and Loki was growing anxious, despite his best efforts to just empty his mind and await his master’s return.

What if something had happened to Thor? Would anyone even check up on Loki? Should Loki do something, or was he meant to wait by the door?

But then, there was nothing for him to do. So he stayed, fighting the anxiety that grew larger and larger in his chest, threatening to make him choke.

At quarter past seven, when Loki had almost gone mad with panic, he heard the door being unlocked and instant relief washed through him, so strong that it made tears rise in his eyes, which he hurriedly wiped away. Loki immediately corrected his position, putting his hands behind his back and lowering his head, as the door opened, and Thor stepped inside.

Loki was so glad that Thor was here, that he didn’t even think to be upset like he had would have before.

“Shouldn’t you be getting dinner ready by now?” Thor asked as he looked down at Loki, unimpressed by his display of loyalty and patience and perfectly unaware by the fear and worry he had caused.

“I am sorry, master,” Loki said. His heart sank and his stomach twisted at the mere possibility of having displeased Thor. “I was waiting for you.”

“Oh,” Thor stopped and shifted his weight. He always did, when he was uncomfortable because he had forgotten something. “I didn’t tell you that I was meeting up with my tutor today, did I?”

“No master, you did not,” Loki said. Loki didn’t feel a trace of anger at the fact, that he hadn’t told his slave his exact plans- Thor had so much to think of, he couldn’t permanently have Loki on his mind, after all. “May I ask you how it went?”

Thor only seemed to be too eager to tell him.

“She’s amazing. She’s- oh my god. She’s very smart okay? She absolutely shredded my essay,” Thor laughed like that was the most endearing thing ever. “We spent the whole afternoon to fix it. But she said this should get me an A and I think so too. She uses all those fancy words, you know? Unbeknownst. She actually used the word unbeknownst.”

“That sounds amazing,” Loki said, and he tried so much to sound genuine about it, but the words rang hollow to his ears.

“You must be very exhausted having worked all day, Master,” Loki tried. “Would you like me to pleasure you?”

Usually, Thor would never deny an offer like that. His master was blessed with an unusually high libido and it happened frequently that Thor would seek use of his body more than once a day, especially now that Loki had learned so much about how to pleasure him. 

But today, he only shook his head in disinterest and strolled into the living room, where he slumped down on the couch. 

Loki followed him unsurely.

“Actually, I’d prefer it if you finally started cooking now,” He said, staring down into his phone without looking at Loki at all.

“Of course, master.” Loki hid the surprise and the hurt between a perfect act of obedience, bowing his head.

He had no right to be hurt, after all. Thor didn’t owe him anything. Quite the opposite, everything he did for Loki, was an act of impossible kindness, and Loki ought to be grateful. But no matter how often Loki repeated this fact to himself, the pain just wouldn’t go away.

Loki moved to the kitchen, to make something quick for dinner, to make up for the delay, and all the while, Thor continued talking to him.

“We’re going to meet up this Saturday. She doesn’t have a car and I offered to show her around town. She only just moved here. You know this little cliff by the edge of town, looking over the ocean?”

“No, I don’t master,” Loki answered. Before his enslavement, he had lived many hundred miles away from here and Thor had never taken the time to show him any landmarks. And why would he? Loki was just his slave. He didn’t need to know the area to serve his master.

“Well, it’s very pretty up there. I said I’d bring something to eat. Remember to prepare a picnic for that day.”

“Of course, master.”

“I was hoping that we could see the sunset there you know? And then watch the stars, because she told me that she does astrology. It’s really cool.”

Loki was pretty sure that it was astronomy, but of course, he would never dare to correct his master about it. Especially not, since most likely he was the one mistaken- Loki got confused very often. It was a part of his nature.

“That sounds wonderful,” Loki said from the kitchen absent-minded. The pain was rolling through him in waves now and along it came an undefined fear.

Did this mean that he would be all alone on Saturday? Did this mean that he would be forgotten a lot more often in the future?

“She is wonderful,” Thor sighed. “She’s very beautiful. Especially when talking about planets and stuff. Her eyes just light up- no, her whole face lights up. It’s absolutely stunning.”

Loki didn’t know what to say at that, so he remained silent. Not that Thor seemed to mind at all.

“And I think she likes me too. Like sure, a lot of girls like me, no big deal…but I think we hit it off, you know? For real this time.”

“I am very happy for you, master,” Loki said quietly. “If it isn’t inappropriate for me to ask, what is her name?”

“She’s called Jane. Isn’t that such a beautiful name too?”

“It’s lovely. She sounds lovely.”

Loki finished cooking without saying another word, he served Thor his dinner, and once his master was done eating, Loki was allowed to eat the leftovers, as every evening, and then went on to clean the kitchen, before he joined Thor in the living room.

He was watching a series, but Loki barely understood what was happening, he always missed the beginnings, because he was still in the kitchen and had to get up whenever his master needed anything.

Not that that was a problem, of course. He just tried going along with the story, even if he didn't quite get the plot.

Being allowed to watch along was a privilege and he had to be grateful that Thor deemed him worthy enough. 

He spent the movie kneeling next to Thor, as he did every night. But this time his master didn’t pet his hair or fondle him as he so often did. In fact, Thor barely seemed to be paying attention at all, neither to the show nor his slave. Instead, he was glued to his phone, answering messages and the glow on his face made Loki suspect that he must be talking to Jane.

Once they had watched a few episodes like that and Thor turned off the TV, Loki still didn’t get up from his spot on the floor.

“Master would you…is there anything I can do to pleasure you?” Loki asked hopefully, desperate to just be of use again. Before the institute, Loki may have hated what Thor did to him, even though he couldn’t quite remember why that was, but now Loki craved the attention, the connection to his master. It was the best part of his day, perhaps one of the few things that got him close to being happy.

“Uhm…yeah. Go lie down on my bed. Uh, face down,” Thor said, still staring down at his phone. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

Loki did as he was told. But Thor wasn’t there in a minute. 

It was more like an hour before he joined Loki in the bedroom, where the slave just corrected his position, to lift his ass higher up in the air, spread his legs, arched his back, and kept his head down just like he was asked.

But while Loki was doing what he always did, Thor was being very different. 

He was slower, gentler and Loki wasn’t sure what to do with his master’s unusual behaviour. He stroked Loki's back soothingly, kissed his neck. But as Loki began to moan in response, Thor suddenly stopped moving altogether.

“Can you not do that?” Thor asked, sounding annoyed.

Loki’s heart sank. 

“I’m sorry. What would you have me do differently?”

“Just…be quiet, okay? It’s irritating.”

Loki swallowed heavily, as Thor’s words clicked into place and the warmth began to seep out of his body, leaving him shuddering with cold.

Thor was pretending to be with this woman, and Loki was disturbing his illusion.

“Yes, of course, I am very sorry,” He whispered which made Thor groan in annoyance. 

“Just shut up already.”

And Loki did. He took the gentle fucking, that wasn’t meant for him and when Thor was done, he moved off the mattress, to lie down on his mat at the foot of Thor’s bed.

He couldn’t fall asleep for a long time.

The ghostly light radiating from Thor’s phone as he continued to talk to Jane kept him awake.

~

Thor felt reminded of the fact, that everything in his life just seemed to work out mysteriously. His mother called him a lucky child because no matter what, even the worst situations always turned out good for him.

At first, he had been upset, knowing that Loki couldn’t correct his papers anymore. Instead, he had to look for a tutor, who instead of doing all the work for him, would torture him for hours with grammar, vocabulary, and correct citation.

But then he had met Jane.

Thor had never been one to fall in love easily, his attention towards women was usually short-lived and ruled by desire, but with Jane everything was different. 

He adored her, missed her every time they were apart and whenever they were together time just flew by, the hours feeling much more like minutes and he dreaded the moment when they had to leave each other. Even as days turned into weeks, his feelings towards her didn't change or faded away.

In fact, he only seemed to fall more deeply in love with her the more time they spent together.

Even his friends were secondary now and using Loki wasn’t as much fun as it used to be. Fucking him didn’t do much to sate his desire to make love with Jane, slow and gently as he had never wanted to be with anyone else before, and he became annoyed with his slave, simply for the fact that he couldn’t be Jane.

Sometimes he’d still fuck Loki, to take the edge off, but more often than not, he simply wasn’t in the mood. Sleeping with Loki felt base and cheap, in comparison to the intense love he experienced every time he was near Jane.

It was Saturday and Thor got home late, from a date at the cinema, to find Loki kneel by the door as per usual.

He looked cute in the flowy little nightgown he wore, his long dark hair (not as long as Jane’s) brushing over his shoulders. Thor regarded his slave for a moment, before making the decision that tonight he needed some release.

“Get in position on the bed,” Thor ordered, as he took off his shoes. “I’ll be with you in a moment.”

“Of course, Master,” Loki replied, getting up from his spot on the floor with effortless grace and moved to follow Thor’s order.

Thor wasn’t in a hurry to follow Loki. If the slave had waited this long for him, then surely he could stand to wait a few minutes longer. First, Thor went to get himself a glass of water in the kitchen and checked his phone for a message from Jane. 

_Got home well. Thank you for tonight, it was wonderful <3_

Thor beamed, as he read the message, his heart was open and bright and so very full of love.

_Tonight was magic, I miss you so much. Can’t wait to see you again. Sweet dreams <3 <3 <3_

_Neither can I! <3 Sleep well Thor! <3 <3 <3 <3_

Thor was giddy, as he put his phone away and made his way towards the bedroom. While walking he already took off his shirt. Loki might not be the person he needed to be with right now, but he was hard and needy and needed to let off some steam. And it was better to let off that steam, because he would never think to pressure Jane, just because of his own desires.

After all, Thor wanted it to be special with her, when the time was right, at their own pace.

The lights in the room were already dimmed, Loki knew by now, that Thor preferred not to see him in detail while they fucked, and as always did everything to be pleasing for his master.

He was on the bed, in the position Thor had ordered him to and Thor let go of a groan, as he opened the buttons of his pants and slid out of them.

He kicked them aside and joined Loki on the bed, firmly grabbing his buttocks, which looked so feminine covered by the delicate lacy fabric. Loki stayed quiet in response, just like Thor had told him to a few weeks ago.

The slave didn’t make a sound, as Thor let his large hands wander over his lithe body, up to his back and then down his thighs, traveling back up- until the sensation of smooth skin was interrupted by something uneven and rough beneath his fingertips.

Thor traced over the spot again, to make sure that he hadn’t imagined it, but it was still there. 

He frowned in confusion.

He rubbed at the spot, to see if it would come off and now a little pained whimper crawled from Loki’s throat, and a bit of wetness spread beneath his fingertips.

Thor withdrew to look at his fingers, puzzled, but he couldn’t see anything in the dim light.

“Loki? What the hell is this?”

“I’m sorry, master,” Loki whispered softly, but he didn’t answer Thor’s question.

And instead of pushing for an answer, Thor got off the bed to turn on the lights, making the room unforgivingly bright all of a sudden. Now that he looked at his fingers again, he found that they were reddened by traces of red.

Traces of blood.

“Loki. What the hell,” Thor said, his voice quiet with shock.

Loki was still in his position on the bed, hadn’t moved an inch, but looking closer Thor could see that he was shivering.

“I’m sorry.”

“Turn around.”

Thor watched, as Loki moved onto his knees and then sat down on the bed. And now Thor could see. A set of angry red cuts on his upper thigh, standing out aggressively in contrast to his otherwise unmarred skin. They seemed to be screaming at him, loud and accusingly.

“What the hell is this about?”

“I just…I don’t know,” Loki sounded so broken and it only further infuriated Thor. 

“You don’t know?! You better make more of an effort to answer my question!” Thor shouted, making Loki bite down on his lower lip, which had started to wobble dangerously.

“I’m sorry, master,” He pressed out. “I don’t know why I did it. Sometimes I just get so sad. I guess it felt good.”

“It felt good?! That’s your excuse?” Thor ran a hand over his face. “That’s…that’s sick. Do you know that? You’re fucking sick.”

“I know. I’m sorry, master.” Loki had lowered his gaze, he swallowed against what must be a heavy lump in his throat and a heavy tear dropped down onto his scarred thighs.

“Get off the bed. You just ruined the evening,” Thor groaned, trying to mask his genuine shock by anger and indifference. He had to appear strong. Unsettled. Not just in front of Loki but also in front of himself. He couldn't let this get to him.

“I’m sorry, master.”

“Say sorry one more time!” Thor let the threat hang vaguely in the air, as Loki slipped off the bed, where he pressed his forehead and his palms towards the floor, in an utterly submissive position that just begged for forgiveness.

Thor rubbed his temples, where a throbbing headache was starting to build. This evening could have been so perfect, and now everything had just turned to shit.

What was he even supposed to do now? Pretend like it didn’t happen? Punish Loki?

But that hadn’t worked out so well last time. Romanoff had been super mad at him for it, even though it had seemed like the most natural thing to do at the time.

But that gave him an idea. He should call Romanoff. After all, she had offered him to contact her, if there was an emergency- and this had to count as an emergency, right? 

Probably even more so than the time Loki hadn’t been able to fix his paper. 

“Loki, stay here, and don’t you dare move.”

Thor took his phone from his pocket and dialed Romanoff’s number, without considering it even for a moment longer. He left the room, closing the door behind himself with a little too much force as he waited for the woman to pick up.

She did after almost a minute had passed.

“This is Romanoff speaking, who is this?”

“Thor. Odinson,” Thor said, as he let himself fall onto the living room couch. 

“Mister Odinson, I will have to ask you to call me tomorrow morning, we are past business hours-“

“Loki hurt himself,” Thor blurted out and for a moment there was silence on the other end of the line.

Then a defeated sigh.

“Could you give me a bit more detail about that?”

“Well, he…I guess he must have cut himself.”

“Is he in need of immediate medical attention?”

“No…no I think he’s fine,” Thor explained. “It’s not that extreme.”

“How would you describe the nature of this act?” She asked and when Thor failed to give an immediate answer, she gave him a few options to choose from. “Do you believe it was an act of aggression towards you?”

“No,” Thor responded with a frown. “Why do you think it's aggressive towards me?”

“Well, he damaged his body, which is your property. It could be seen as an act of rebellion against you, or a way to reclaim his body for himself.”

“No…no I don’t think it’s that,” Thor said hesitantly. Loki didn’t seem confrontative at all. “He said he did it because he’s sad.”

“Do you believe it might be an attempt to end his life?”

“What? No! No, he wouldn’t do that. What makes you think that?”

“Well,” Romanoff began. “As I told you last time, slaves tend to be very emotionally unstable and are more prone to mental illness than the average citizen. They lack the same emotional regulation skills most healthy people have and often are incapable of rational decision making.”

“Oh,” Thor swallowed. “I didn’t know that.”

“Were there any large changes in your life recently that could explain this behaviour? Did your living situation change, did you get another slave…?”

“No,” Thor frowned as he listened to Romanoff. “No, nothing changed.”

“Nothing?” The woman sounded entirely unconvinced. “Are you certain about that?”

“Well…I guess there’s one thing. I have been dating someone for a few weeks. So that’s new.”

“And that person you’re dating, I suppose they take up a lot of your time and attention?”

“Yes. Yes, of course. Her name is Jane, we met at college, she was supposed to be my tutor but then we-“

“I don’t need to know the details,” The woman cut him off. “You’re probably neglecting him.”

Thor stopped his pacing in surprise. That thought had never crossed his mind those last few weeks.

“You’re saying I’m not allowed to go on dates anymore, because my slave can’t handle it? That’s ridiculous.”

That possibility seemed stupid to Thor. Loki was his slave, and he would simply have to deal with the way Thor lived his life. After all, Loki was supposed to make his life easier and not harder and he wouldn’t get a say in the way Thor lived his relationships.

“Mister Odinson, it seems to me that you are unaware of your position. You are Loki’s main, and for the most time only social contact. He is extremely reliant on you and if you neglect him, it will have a severe impact on his mental health.”

“You really think he’d _actually_ kill himself?”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, but it’s a possibility that we need to monitor. I believe this is more of a warning sign,” Romanoff explained. “For now, try to spend some more time with him. Give him a bit more positive reinforcement than you usually would, to keep up your bond. And perhaps bring your girlfriend over some time and establish her as an authority figure to him. That’s something he knows how to handle. He was trained to serve couples and families.”

“Yeah. That sounds like a good idea,” Thor agreed with a slow nod of his head. He liked that idea. Jane would come back home with him, they’d sit on the couch, talking and laughing, and let Loki serve them- Jane would be treated like the queen she deserved to be and Thor had no doubt that she would love everything about it. Perhaps she would even move in and then all problems would be solved at once.

“But like…what am I supposed to do right now?”

Romanoff sighed but answered, nonetheless.

“Firstly, don’t apologize. He mustn’t believe that he was in the right to do what he did. Let him know that he is not allowed to damage your property, his body being no exception. Give him a punishment for his behaviour, but don’t be too harsh with it. And then go on with what I’ve told you.”

Thor nodded his head hearing this. This seemed manageable. Not a big deal. None of this was a big deal at all, no reason to freak out.

Thor sighed in relief and thanked Romanoff before he hung up the phone and returned to Loki in the bedroom, where the young slave still cowered on the ground. 

He was grateful for the steady plan of action Romanoff had laid out for him. It seemed sensible and effective and most importantly gave him something to do, rather than dwell on unsettling thoughts.

Because for a moment there, Thor had almost thought of himself as a bad person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, News Flash: Thor is still a major asshole who hits snooze on all of his wake up calls. And having gf doesn't do much to change that...
> 
> Trust me guys I do eventually want things to get better but then I get writing and everything just turns to shit. But it has to get worse before it can get better right? Same with the chapter length, I want to write it a short, compact chapter, and then it's 4.000 words all out of nowhere and I still feel like I didn't go into enough detail...why can't this happen me with my essays? I hope you don't mind the length of the chapter and it's still okay to read.
> 
> But anyways thank you so much for all of your support, I look forward so much to reading about your thoughts!
> 
> CHAPTER SUMMARY:  
> Thor falls in love with his tutor, Jane, whom he hired since Loki can no longer correct his essays. They start dating and Thor begins to neglect Loki emotionally, for weeks as he is dating Jane. During this time, he fantasizes about Jane when he is sleeping with Loki. This has a bad effect in Loki’s mental health and as they were about to have sex, Thor discovers that Loki has self harmed. In response he grows upset, while Loki is distraught and apologetic. Thor calls Romanoff to ask for advice and she tells him to give Loki more attention and introduce Jane to him but doesn’t show true empathy and concern for Loki’s mental state. In the end Thor is self assured, telling himself that he is not to blame and goes on to follow Romanoffs advice. The act of self harming is purposefully not described and there are no gory details!


	8. Chapter 8

“Tonight, everything just needs to be perfect.”

“Of course, master,” Loki nodded his head eagerly, to show that he understood the importance of the situation.

“Tell me again, how this evening is going to go,” Thor demanded, sitting on the living room couch, while Loki knelt on the floor across from him. 

“You will pick up Mistress Jane at her house and be back with her at the apartment by seven-thirty. By then the table must be set, the dinner must be ready, including the dessert,” Loki recited the plan, which his master had told him a few days ago. He had internalized it ever since.

“And while we’re here?” Thor asked, lifting a brow expectantly.

“I will wait in your office.”

“Exactly. I’ll call for you to come out when the time is right. And until then you just stay quiet and you don’t leave the room. No matter what.”

“I won’t, master.”

“And…well there’s the possibility that the right time won’t come tonight,” Thor explained, gesturing vaguely with his hands. “You see, I can’t just ruin the evening if tonight turns out to be…really special between me and Jane.”

Loki nodded his head, listening to his master, even though his words were twisting his heart and he had to dig his nails into his palms behind his back, to keep his eyes from filling with tears.

He could already guess what Thor meant by ‘special’. His master was hoping that maybe tonight he would get what Loki had been a poor substitute for those past few weeks and Thor’s next few words confirmed Loki’s suspicions and added another painful stab to Loki's chest.

“So, you should bring your mat to the office with you. Just in case Jane sleeps over. Which might not happen…but who knows. At this point I don’t really know how the evening is going to go,” Thor shrugged. “But if she stays the night, you can’t leave the room in the morning either. Just…just sleep in, okay? You’d be freed from your usual duties in the morning.”

“Thank you, master,” Loki said and bowed his head. “That is very kind of you.”

But beneath his calm exterior, Loki was a mess, a whirlwind of emotions that he could barely tell apart. A part of him was hurt and scared, knowing that he might be replaced so easily and maybe lose the last meaningful connection he had to another human being: the sexual relationship he had with Thor.

And beyond that, he was hurt by the fact that Thor might not even want to introduce him after all, even though that was supposed to be the whole point of the evening. Introducing him to Jane, so she could come over more often and Loki could serve both of them, instead of being alone all day. Instead, Thor hid him away like something shameful and inappropriate, worried that his presence might disturb their evening. 

One wouldn’t want their sex toy present, on a romantic date with their significant other.

But then there was another part still, that felt relief. 

Maybe he wouldn’t have to meet this woman tonight.

Thor had shown him a picture of her, and with her wavy brown hair and her sculpted face, she reminded him too much of Sif and the idea made an undefined dread rise within Loki.

A memory in the back of his mind, a nightmare that crept up on him every now and again, in which he was held down by a creature with a hundred hands, forcing him into a kiss through which he couldn’t breathe. In the dream, he couldn’t scream, he couldn’t move either, he could only keep kissing and pray that the creature would be satisfied before he grew mad with fear.

But that never happened. Loki always woke up first, sweaty and anxious, struggling to suck air into his lungs.

“What else needs to be done in the kitchen?” Thor asked, perfectly oblivious to the fact that Loki felt like drowning right in front of him. Thor's fidgeting and the bouncing of his legs made it clear that he was nervous about this evening too, even though on a different scale and for different reasons than his slave was.

He just wanted things to be as good as they could possibly be for Jane, wanted her to like him and the apartment so that she would want to be with him as badly as he wanted to be with her.

“The Tiramisu is in the fridge, the Bolognese sauce is ready, the wine is cooled. I’m almost done setting the table and I will grate the cheese and cook the Spaghetti once you leave to pick up Mistress Jane.”

“Sure. That sounds fine. That sounds really good actually,” Thor said and nervously smiled at Loki, which despite his inner panic, still made a warm happy flutter spread in Loki’s stomach. He was addicted to that smile, just like he was to every word of praise coming from his master and he longed for every sign of affection from him.

“Oh!” Thor got up from the couch, seemingly glad to just be able to do something, instead of just sitting around and double-checking that everything would go smoothly. “I actually have something for you!”

The tiny warm flutter turned into disbelieving joy and Loki’s eyes grew larger as they watched Thor move across the room, towards the shelf where he kept his consoles.

What could he possibly have for Loki? A new kind of sex toy? An outfit he wanted him to wear? Loki was excited about the possibilities, even though they were very limited in his mind. He didn’t dare dream any bigger than that anymore. 

But it didn’t even matter what it was, Thor had gotten _him_ something. That alone made Loki feel like he was something special, even though it might just be in a small, insignificant way.

Thor returned to Loki, holding a small red and blue console, which Loki had seen him play with when his friends were over. Loki stared at the device utterly puzzled.

How could this be for him? And what would he be expected to do with it?

“It’s for tonight,” Thor explained, seeming a bit sheepish. “I just need you to wait and be very quiet for maybe a pretty long time. So, you can have this for tonight. But only because you’ve been pretty good those past few weeks.”

The tears that Loki had tried to hold back all this time now spilled over and he sniffled, as he wiped his sleeve over his eyes but they just kept on rolling down his cheeks, as the image of Thor holding the console blurred in front of him.

“That’s…that’s, thank you, master. Thank you…you don’t have to. I know I’ve…disappointed you lately. I’m not sure if I deserve it.”

“I’m the one who decides what you do and do not deserve.”

“Of course. You are right master, I’m sorry,” Loki hastily apologized and after wiping over his eyes once more, he hesitantly held out his hands for the device and was surprised when Thor actually handed it to him. He looked at it in wonder. The words Nintendo Switch were written on the plastic shell. “I…when I was young my friend had a Nintendo. We couldn’t afford one, but I got to play on hers when I came over to visit.”

“That’s cool,” Thor said and shifted his weight to show his discomfort. He didn't like talking about Loki’s past and he had made that very clear to Loki before. Loki should have known better and he shouldn’t have brought it up. He grew tense, waiting for Thor’s reaction. But tonight Thor didn’t grow upset. Instead, he even went on to ask Loki one of the very few personal questions he ever had in the two years they had spent together. “What did you use to play?”

Loki almost choked. Both the memory itself, and the fact that Thor even bothered to ask, made him struggle to breathe around the mix of profound sadness and long-gone joy.

He could barely speak but he didn’t want to anger his master now and risk having his treat taken away.

“We played Tetris. And Mario Cart. And Animals Crossing,” Loki’s voice cracked towards the end and he blinked away the tears that still stung in his eyes. He wasn’t even sure what was making him so terribly sad. Thor was so good to him and all Loki could do was cry. “I’m sorry…I’m sorry, I don’t mean to come across as ungrateful. I’m…very happy. Thank you.”

“Well, I have Mario Cart and Animals Crossing on there. You can play them if you like.”

“Yes. Yes, that would be great,” Loki sniffled and offered Thor a small, teary-eyed smile. “May I…may I put it in the office already?”

“Sure. But you can’t play with it until everything is done. Don’t make me regret this by half-assing any of your tasks.”

“I swear, I won’t master,” Loki promised eagerly.

“I hope not. This evening…it just has to be perfect, okay?”

~

“So, this is where you live?” Jane asked, when Thor parked the car in front of the modern apartment building.

“It is,” Thor confirmed and flashed her a bright smile. He just couldn’t help but smile whenever he was near her, his lips just naturally curved upwards when looking at Jane. 

“I kind of guessed you were well-off because of the car…but this confirms it. This is prime property. I probably couldn’t even afford to go to a restaurant in this area.”

“You’ll like it!” Thor promised, as he got out of the car and walked over to open the door for Jane. “It’s quiet, close to the beach and the city-centre…you’ll love the view across the bay.”

“Oh, you’re trying to get me to consider moving in with you already? You’re not being very subtle,” Jane joked and nudged Thor with her elbow, which made him laugh while lying an arm around her waist.

“Why be subtle?” Thor asked, earning a snort from Jane as he kissed her hair on the way towards the building. "Living with me might beat the dorm rooms.”

“I doubt it. The dorms might be in need of a renovation and they always smell of weed and potato chips, but they're five minutes from the campus and I think my roommate would never forgive me if I left her alone there. And she has a taser, you don’t want to mess with her.”

“Darcy can move in too, if that’s what’s holding you back!” Thor offered, half-joking and yet half-serious, as he led Jane through the opening hall and towards the elevator. 

“Oh, don’t tell her that, she’d say yes for the both of us immediately,” Jane said with a chuckle, leaning against them as the elevator took them up to the highest level. “And then you’d never get rid of us.”

“Hm, thanks for pointing that out, maybe I should tell her for that exact reason,” Thor said and pulled Jane closer for a kiss, which she responded to, running a gentle hand through his hair.

They broke their kiss and smiled at each other stupidly, just before the elevator doors opened and Thor reached for Jane’s hand to guide her towards his apartment. 

“Maybe after tonight, I won’t need her to convince you anymore,” Thor said, as he took the key from his pocket. “Maybe you’ll be the one begging me to let you move in.”

“Hm, I doubt it,” Jane snorted. “Probably depends on how many empty beer cans are beneath your sofa. If it’s more than five I’ll probably pass.”

“If it depends on that, then you’ll probably move in immediately,” Thor answered with a self-assured laugh, as he unlocked the door and gestured for Jane to enter. 

The surprised look on her face as she took a few steps inside and looked around the apartment made Thor’s heart beat higher in his chest and the smile on his face grew even wider.

“So, what do you think?”

“It’s…it’s clean. Wow. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a place inhabited by a male college student that was so…pristine,” Jane said, sounding genuinely impressed. He’d known that it would pay off to order Loki to deep clean the entire apartment before Jane came over. 

“I know, right?”

“And it smells wonderful in here. You’ve been cooking?”

“Of course! What did you think, I’d just order pizza or something?”

“Well…honestly, yeah,” Jane said with a chuckle as she brushed her hair behind her ear. “My mum would love this. A guy who is handsome, rich, cooks, and cleans…she’d be over the moon. What’s for dinner?”

“Spaghetti Bolognese. But it’s all handmade, the sauce, everything. No shortcuts. Only the very best for you,” Thor promised, as he led Jane to the dinner table, which was beautifully set, with the cutlery symmetrically aligned, the napkins folded eloquently, and a candle in the middle of the table, alongside a bouquet of red roses.

“Oh, I love a man who doesn’t settle for the easy path,” Jane teased, and gave Thor’s hand a tight squeeze before she let go to slowly walk around the large room herself, looking out of the window. “Are you going to show me around a bit? I'd love to see the rest of the apartment.”

“Of course, got to convince you to stay after all,” Thor grinned. “But before that let’s have dinner, shall we?” 

“We shall,” Jane answered and gently lied her palms on either side of Thor’s face, to pull him into a gentle kiss.

~

Loki slowly walked along the beach, watching in fascination as the waves gently rolled across the sand, while the sun slowly lowered itself toward the horizon, painting the water orange and pink. He came across a seashell and picked it up, looking at it with joy. 

It was beautiful. But not why he was here.

He walked closer towards the shore and saw a shadow beneath the surface. Loki cast out his line, aiming a bit away from the fish, so it wouldn’t be startled and disappear. It worked. The fish swam closer curiously, nudged the hook, and then finally he got it and Loki hurriedly drew in the line. 

_I caught a sea bass! No, wait- it’s at least a C+!_

Loki snorted at the joke and as soon as he had put the fish away, he started running across the grass towards the village, to deliver the fish to one of the villagers who had asked him for it.

It was a little duck, who waited for him in front of the city hall and when he handed the fish over, the cute animal was overjoyed and thanked him.

‘You’re the greatest Loki!’ The screen read. ‘I can always count on you. Here have this as a little thank you.’

Loki’s eyes were instantly brimming with tears as he read the message. He had been playing the game for hours now, but still, every kind word he read on the screen touched his heart, as though it was praise meant directly for him, and not just a generic message with his name in it.

Loki didn't care. Everyone was being so _nice_ to him. Everyone treated him like he was someone worthwhile and respectable and the entire time Loki got to do anything he wanted, without rules or restrictions, and he still felt useful.

He got to pick his own clothes, decorated his own house, planted flowers, caught fish and butterflies, collected fruit, and talked to every single villager he came across, relishing in the interaction, no matter how two-dimensional or meaningless it might seem to anyone else.

The game with its bright colours and fun activities helped Loki take his mind off of things and eased his anxiety if only for a while but every now and again, he snapped out of the peaceful fantasy world he had entered and became alert, listening closely to the sounds coming from the living room.

Until twelve pm it was the sound of laughter and quiet conversation.

A while after that, he listened to footsteps moving through the corridor and he had hurriedly put the device away and got into position, to greet his master and Jane- but they walked past the office door and towards the bedroom, and Loki’s shoulders sank. 

It seemed that tonight the right moment hadn’t come after all.

He understood of course. This evening was very important to his master. And while Loki was oddly disappointed at being brushed aside so easily, he was also grateful for the fact that he could avoid Jane for a while longer.

But it hurt of course. And when briefly after soft, pleasurable moans spilled from the bedroom, not even the game with its bright colours and friendly messages was enough to distract Loki from his pain anymore and he turned it off, leaving him alone, in the dark room.

Usually, Loki went to bed as early as he could, unless of course, his master was making use of him. His days were long and exhausting and this one had been no exception, but tonight he simply couldn’t fall asleep, even as his body was heavy with exhaustion, after having spent the entire day cleaning and cooking.

Even once the moans stopped coming from the bedroom and the apartment grew quiet, Loki was wide awake, curled up on his mat, staring blankly into the all-encompassing darkness. Loki was lonely, the soft sound of Thor’s snoring wasn’t there to comfort him.

He was also thirsty and wished that he could go to the bathroom, but Thor had been very clear in his orders.

Loki was not allowed to leave the room. And so he wouldn't.

~

Jane couldn’t fall asleep, even as Thor was snoring softly beside her.

She was too giddy, too excited and her heart still hammered wildly in her chest.

She couldn’t wait to tell Darcy, that her handsome date wasn’t just friendly, funny, and attentive, but also lived in a beautiful upscale apartment, that was kept perfectly tidy and cooked like a professional chef. And on top of that, he was good in bed.

Jane had been wary at first, expecting Thor to be superficial and interested in nothing else but getting her into bed, but as the weeks passed, she let down her guard and allowed herself to believe that she had found a genuinely good guy.

A rare find. But who was to say that she didn’t deserve to be lucky every once in a while?

And with Thor, she had been very, very lucky. Maybe the luckiest she could ever remember being.

Jane carefully slipped out of bed, trying not to wake Thor, even though she had a feeling that the man would sleep through everything, which made her smile fondly.

With her phone’s flashlight to illuminate the way, she left in search of the bathroom.

After dinner Thor had not shown her around the apartment as he had promised, they were too busy having a meaningful conversation about the universe and life itself until they stumbled right into bed, eager to take off each other’s clothes.

So now the dark corridor stretched out to her, with doors on either side and she wasn’t sure which one to open. 

Trial and error, it would be then.

The first door she opened led to a guest room, the other to a pantry, the next to a broom closet. 

She sighed as she closed the door again and turned towards the next. She was naked, except for the shirt she had put on before leaving the bed, and felt exposed creeping along strange corridors in the middle of the night. She only wanted to find the bathroom and then immediately return to the warm bed and cuddle up next to Thor until the next morning.

Jane pressed down the handle to the next door and opened it quietly. It was not a bathroom either and she was about to leave again but an unmistakable movement in the dark room startled her and she jerkily turned the flashlight towards the corner of the room. 

It illuminated a pale, gaunt face staring right back at her from within the darkness of the room.

Jane was deaf to the shrill scream that made its way out of her throat and stumbled backwards in unseeing panic until her back hit the wall behind her.

Her heart beat rapidly, fast enough to hurt in her chest, but she paid no mind to it, her eyes were fixed on the dark door where she had clearly seen a stranger’s face just moments ago.

She wanted to direct her flashlight back into the room to investigate but her hands were shaking too badly, and she was too afraid of what might be lurking in the shadows.

Suddenly, the dark corridor lit up all at once and when her head jerked around, she saw Thor standing there, still fully naked, confused but ready to protect her.

“Jane?” He asked, walking up to her with a worried frown on her face, to lie a broad arm around her. “What happened? Are you okay?”

“Thor-“ Jane gasped for air, grateful to lean against him and hold onto his shoulder. “There’s someone in this room. I swear, I saw it. We have to call the police!”

Her frantic eyes were still fixed on the door leading into the room, where the stranger was still hiding, but there was no movement, not a sound coming from within, which only put her all the more on edge. 

Perhaps he was armed and was preparing his attack? Was it a burglar? Or someone with a far more malicious intent?

However, once her hectic gaze flickered over towards Thor, she saw that he didn’t seem to be nearly as concerned as she was. Instead, he just seemed somewhat awkward.

“Well, about that…” Thor shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck. “Uhm. I wanted to tell you tonight. But then we had such a good evening and things got so special, so I was going to tell you tomorrow instead…”

“Tell me what?” Jane asked, puzzled as she took the time to get a closer look at Thor’s face, in search of an answer. Something wasn't right. But she couldn't put her finger on it.

“Loki, come here,” Thor said instead of answering her question, and from the darkness of the room, emerged a young man. He was noticeably skinny, his shoulders were pulled up and he blinked at the assault of the bright light on his eyes. 

It was clearly the face she had seen just moments ago, still ghostly pale and gaunt but in the light, he wasn’t intimidating at all anymore. Instead, he was quite honestly…pitiful.

A new kind of horror spread through Jane, like icy cold water, as she watched the stranger get on his knees before them, his eyes cast downwards, while he held his hands behind his back.

“Mistress Jane,” He began, an underlying tremor in his voice. “I am pleased to meet you and will be happy to serve you, in any way you deem fit.”

It was only now that she noticed the heavy collar locked around the young man’s throat and the sight seemed to suck the air out of her lungs.

“Thor,” Jane asked, her voice numb and empty, as she still just stared at the young man in front of them. “Who is this?”

“This is Loki,” Thor explained, his words dull through the sound of static in her ears. “He’s my slave.”

That’s when something snapped within Jane. The momentum of the shock and the fear turned into a pure, uncontrollable rage. She pushed Thor away from her harshly and then raised her hand to give him a powerful slap across the face, the cracking sound of which made Loki flinch on the floor.

But Jane didn’t even notice.

“A slave?! Are you fucking out of your mind, you own a slave?” For a moment Jane just stared at Thor in disbelief but when Thor failed to come up with an answer, she went on, her voice shrill with rage. “You disgusting filthy scum, I can’t believe this! I thought I knew you! And you keep a slave locked up in your apartment, you’re- you’re the lowest of the low, I’m so fucking stupid, how could I have believed someone could be as perfect as you!”

“Jane!” Thor interrupted her rage-filled monologue. The look on his face displayed nothing but utter confusion. “Jane, I don’t know what you’re thinking but Loki is here legally. He’s living a good life here. And I really don’t see why you-“

“You don’t see why I’m making a fuss about you owning a human being?! You’re absolutely disgusting Thor.”

“No, I _don’t_ see why you’re making such a fuss!” Thor said, his voice growing louder to match Jane’s volume after his pacifying words had done nothing to soothe his hysteric girlfriend. “You act like I’m some sort of criminal! But I’m not the danger to society here!”

Thor gestured accusingly towards Loki, who was still kneeling on the floor, tense and quiet, hoping, hoping so badly, that the anger making the air crackle all around him wouldn’t unload on him, as it did so often.

“Are you listening to yourself?! You think this-“ Now Jane gestured towards Loki’s shaking form as well. “-is a danger to society? You’re holding an innocent person captive! You don’t even fucking realize, do you?” Jane spat the words at Thor, nothing but utter disgust and rage in her tone. 

For a few moments, Thor just stared back at her in disbelief, his hands formed into tight fists at his side, as his nostrils flared with anger.

“You’re one of those extremists,” He growled. “Who thinks all the world needs is some love and fucking rainbows, for everything to go right. Free all the slaves and make the world a better place!”

“Yes, sure, I’m an extremist!" Jane's voice was sour like bile and dripping with sarcasm. "I believe innocent people shouldn’t be held captive, how extreme of me!”

“Fine then,” Thor said, his voice dangerously low. “Loki. Get up and leave. Jane’s got the whole fucking world figured out all by herself and she thinks you’d be better off on your own. Better listen to her and prove her right.”

Loki looked up at the two of them for the first time, shock painted clearly on his face.

If his face had been pale before, now it drained of all colour, matching the white walls of the corridor.

“Master I- I, please, please don’t make me go,” Loki began to beg, disbelief slowly turning into sheer terror as he became aware of the gravity of his masters words. He brought his hands forward to wring them together like he was sending a desperate prayer to some ancient, unforgiving god. His eyes wide in shock were unable to even produce tears. “I’m sorry. Please, I’m begging you, please, please let me stay, I will do anything, I am so sorry. Please don’t make me g-go, I can be better, I swear-”

“Thor, are you crazy?! Stop this!” Jane hissed but Thor wouldn’t listen to her.

“No, but this is what you wanted, isn’t it?” Thor said, his face twisted into a cruel mask. “Loki, get up and walk through that door right now. Jane thinks you don’t like it here, so good luck figuring this out on your own.”

Loki stared back at his master for a moment longer, his face slack with horror, before he broke down sobbing, pressing his face to the floor in hopes that the act of humility might just change his master’s mind.

“Thor!” Jane was screaming now. “Stop torturing him! Don’t you see what you’re doing?!”

“Oh, I thought I was doing exactly what you wanted,” Thor said bitterly, his arms crossed over his chest, while Loki was still sobbing violently at his feet, muttering a mix of pleas and broken apologies. 

“You know _exactly_ what you’re doing!” Jane said as she got down on her knees herself, her hand twitching to reach out for Loki and console him but she knew better than to touch him now. He seemed so utterly broken, whimpering and begging, that it made her heart twist painfully in her chest.

It was hardly bearable to feel the pure pain radiating off of him- how could Thor be so entirely numb to it?

“Loki? Hey,” She tried gently. “Hey, stop crying, it’s okay. You don’t have to leave now. Thor is just being stupid. You can stay here of course.”

Loki was still choking on his sobs, but just as she got the feeling that her words had reached him and he was about to calm down the tiniest bit, Thor started shouting again, making Loki curl up on himself once more.

“What makes you think you get to make any kind of decision?!” Thor said, stomping on the ground like an angry, over-sized child. “Just because you think you’re morally superior, doesn’t mean you’re in charge now! He belongs to me! This is my apartment!”

“Thor, I dare you,” Jane’s voice was quiet, but it shook with rage. “If you don’t stop this, our relationship is over. I’m serious, I won’t ever speak another word with you again and I will never, not in a thousand years forgive you. I mean it.”

To her own surprise, the threat made Thor hesitate.

He seemed to try to figure out whether or not she was serious, but the possibility of forever ruining his chances with Jane was still powerful enough to at least not make him want to take the risk, not even in the heat of the moment.

“You’re crazy,” Thor said, much quieter. “Maybe you really should leave. Not forever- but just until you’ve calmed down. To talk another time. When you can be rational about this.”

Jane laughed bitterly. 

“Since you’ve been so rational this entire time, huh? I'm not leaving. Who knows what you’d do to him as soon as I leave the apartment? You’ve done enough damage, trust me.”

“So, you’ll just stay here, and do what?” Thor sneered. 

“I don’t know yet,” Jane admitted quietly, as she looked back at Loki, who was still cowering on the floor, sobbing softly and whispering apologies that Thor wasn't even listening to. What did one do in a situation so profoundly fucked up? “But I can’t just leave now. Trust me, I’d want nothing more than to get away from you right now…but I’m staying here because of Loki. Not because of you.”

For a moment none of them said anything and Jane steeled herself for another verbal blow from the person she had thought so highly of just moments ago, but when Thor spoke up again, his tone had shifted, had grown unsure and vulnerable.

“Are we…you’re not breaking up with me, right?” He asked and when Jane looked up at him, all she saw was a boy, worried that he might be left behind.

“Thor,” Jane sighed. “Maybe you should just go back to bed. I just can’t stand to look at you right now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thor has gotten a much-needed vibe check: unsurprisingly he didn't pass. And Jane made it very, very clear where stands on slavery, which makes her the first decent person in this story so far, which is about time, considering it's chapter eight already.
> 
> Loki can really use an ally at long last...
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed reading and liked the change in tone! I can't even tell you how much I enjoy reading your comments, every single one lights up my day <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains physical hurt. Not extreme but it's there and might be jarring if it's something you're sensitive to.

Thor was gone now, he had returned to the bedroom and slammed the door shut behind himself, making Loki flinch one final time.

And now he was all alone with Jane.

Loki was scared out of his mind, Thor ordering him to leave the apartment had pulled the rug from beneath his feet, and he still hasn’t recovered from the shock, all the screaming and fighting had frightened him so badly, that he barely even realized that Jane had taken his side throughout it all.

But the realization slowly dawned on him.

Someone was on his side, for the first time in…forever.

He warily glanced over at the woman who had defended him so viciously just moments ago. She was depleted, leaning against a wall biting down on her lower lip, the same way Loki did when he wanted to keep himself from crying.

Loki was still cowering on the floor, doing his best to deflect all attention from himself, because part of him was still scared of Jane and what she might do to him. Part of him knew that Jane wouldn’t force herself on him. But another part, the one that was hurt too badly to trust blindly anymore, was still wary of her.

He watched as Jane took a few deep breaths, looked up towards the ceiling, and wiped some tears that hadn’t yet fallen from her eyes before she straightened up her back and looked over at Loki.

Loki quickly lowered his gaze, staring down at the well-familiar hardwood floor, hoping that Jane hadn’t caught him staring at her.

“Hey,” She tried and when Loki briefly glanced up, he saw her smiling at him, despite the pain she was obviously in. “I’m sorry how that went. That got…ugly. You’re probably pretty scared now, huh?”

“I-“ Loki cleared his throat, his voice came out all funny, cracked, and high-pitched. “Will I have to leave?”

“No. No, you won’t have to leave. Thor was just mad at me. Not at you. You were just the easier target for him,” Jane explained, and Loki felt discomfort, hearing her talk so badly about his master. Making him out to be…a coward, when Loki knew just how much he owed to this man.

“So, how old are you?” Jane asked, in a tone that was both very gentle and an attempt at making regular small-talk. Two things that Loki was barely familiar with at all.

He sniffled, wiping at his eyes that still wouldn’t stop leaking tears, but it wouldn’t do him any good to displease her after Thor was already angry with him.

“I’m twenty-two,” He croaked out hoarsely.

“My little brother is about your age then,” Jane said and smiled at him again. “I’m twenty-four. For how long have you been with Thor now?”

“I’ve been with master Thor for a little over two years now.”

“That’s a long time to get to know a person. Is he always…like that?”

Studying Jane’s face, Loki saw both the hope that maybe Thor might not be as bad of a person after all, and at the same time she was bracing herself for the worst.

But what did Loki have to say really? How could he be a judge of his master’s character?

He shrugged his shoulders unsurely.

“My master is very kind to me,” He began, observing Jane’s expression to avoid any misstep. “He takes very good care of me. I am very lucky to be his.”

Jane frowned, hearing that and Loki knew this instant that she didn’t believe him. She thought that he was lying, and since he was not supposed to lie, she would grow angry and he would be punished. 

But none of that happened. Her doubtful frown remained but her voice stayed calm and pleasant, as she went on with the conversation.

“I see. So, what are your duties around here?”

“I clean. I cook. And I make sure my master’s needs are fulfilled.”

“You’ve made the dinner tonight?” Jane asked conversationally. 

“I did, Mistress Jane. Was there anything wrong with it?” 

“No!” Jane assured quickly. “It was perfect. I’ve rarely eaten pasta that good. I just wanted to say thank you for that.”

Loki flustered, unsure what to do with the unexpected compliment- unlike the game he had played earlier, there was no simple option that he could just select. And besides that, he still mustn’t forget that Jane was not his equal. If he overstepped his boundaries, she might still turn against him. 

“Thank you. I am glad that it was pleasing to you, Mistress Jane.”

“Hey, I know it’s hard for you, but could you try to stop calling me that? Just call me Jane.”

Loki nodded his head unsurely. This conversation felt like he was walking across a lake on thin ice. He couldn’t trust the ice he was on to carry him, every crack made him fear for his life and still, there was no way to get off the lake, besides moving on.

“Of course. I’m sorry.”

“It’s kind of mean, that Thor took the credit for the cooking and cleaning then,” Jane pointed out after a brief pause. “I thought that he was responsible for it.”

The statement made Loki tense, his stomach twisted. If he had known that his master had taken the credit for cooking tonight’s dinner, he would have never challenged Thor for it. Loki had no one to blame but himself for this severe misstep. And Loki feared that Thor would make him pay for it later on.

He just shrugged wordlessly, not answering Jane. The risk was too high, and he had no idea what to say anymore, now that he had already gone too far.

Meanwhile, the frown on Jane’s face had deepened and she looked at him for a few quiet moments, tilting her head.

“Does he sleep with you, Loki?” She asked and even though her tone with still impossibly gentle, the change in topic was jarring to Loki. 

This was dangerous territory, he knew that. 

If any of the information he revealed would lead to the end of Thor’s relationship, he would be the one to blame.

“I’m sorry. I believe I shouldn’t be answering those questions,” Loki explained apologetically, which made Jane raise a brow.

“Is he going to hurt you if you do?”

Loki stayed quiet, even though he was burning to answer the question the way he was trained to. 

It might upset Jane, but he would rather face her anger than Thor’s when he inevitably would return from the bedroom. Which might just happen any minute, when his master would reclaim his authority.

“Okay, you don’t have to answer me,” Jane said when she realized that Loki would no longer talk to her. “I realize those are pretty hard questions…and personal too. I probably shouldn’t have asked them to begin with, I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, Mistress Jane,” Loki answered, despite the fact that he had never been this anxious during any conversation in his entire life.

“How about we have a seat in the living room? I won’t be going back to sleep, and you probably aren’t very tired either, huh?”

Loki shrugged his shoulders and gave a hesitant nod of his head.

“I’ll be calling a friend of mine to come over. She’s trustworthy, I’ve known her for a long time now.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be doing that,” Loki pointed out, as the general anxiety twisted into a stab of fear.

“Oh? Why not?”

“It will make master Thor very angry. This is his apartment after all.”

Jane sighed.

“You see, that’s exactly the reason why I’ll call her. Thor really is very angry and neither of us is safe around him now. But we can’t go anywhere else. And I can’t leave you alone here. So that’s our only option.”

“You can leave me alone,” Loki pointed out quietly. 

“No,” Jane said firmly. “I can’t. If anything would happen to you…I could never forgive myself. I just need to know you’re safe now.”

Loki wanted to argue. He wanted to beg Jane to leave because he knew that she was wrong. She was trespassing on his master’s property she had already overstepped her boundaries and her inviting a friend just seemed needlessly provocative to Loki. 

But he couldn’t say anything.

She was superior to him and he had been taught over and over again to not speak out of turn against people who were above him in rank.

“May I just- may I just go to the bathroom?” Loki finally asked, when he couldn’t come up with anything else to say. And Jane just looked at him so sympathetically, that Loki could hardly stand it before she gave him the permission he needed, and Loki was glad to get away from this uncomfortable conversation.

 _~_  
Darcy answered the phone on the second ring and Jane couldn’t be any more grateful for her friend than she was this moment. 

“Hey, Jane!” The other woman chattered happily. “How are things with Prince Charming? Is it awkward? Need me to act like my boyfriend broke up with me and you need to leave right now immediately, to offer your poor, dumped friend support?”

“No,” Jane said quietly, brushing some of her hair away from her face with her fingers. “Actually…I’d rather if you could come over.”

“Okay, I did not see that coming,” Darcy’s carefree tone turned to worried and Jane could basically imagine the frown on her face. “What happened? You’re not hurt, are you?”

“No,” Jane sighed. “No, I’m okay. But I found this young man here. Hidden in one of the rooms.”

“He’s cheating on you?!”

“No- or maybe yes. But it’s worse than that. That young man, Thor’s slave. He owns him. And Thor…he just got so cruel around him. I’ve never seen him like that before. And that slave- Loki, I just can’t leave him alone here. And Loki wouldn’t dare to leave the apartment either, even if it wasn’t for…for the collar.”

“Oh my god, Jane I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” 

“No, I’m not. But I’ve got to be,” Jane said and swallowed against the painful lump in her throat. “He needs somebody right now. I’m not sure if I’m the right person. But I just have to be strong for him now. I don’t know what even for, I don’t know how to help him. But I can’t just go now. Thor, he’ll…I don’t know how far he would go.”

“I’ll be over in half an hour. My phone is on, call me any time. And if you need to, call the police. They can’t help Loki, but they can help you if you need them to.”

“Thanks, Darcy. I owe you.”

“You do,” Darcy said, and Jane’s lips quirked up into a smile. “You’ll just have to make this up to me by inviting me to brunch some day. Nice brunch.”

“I will. You’re the best.”

“No need to state the obvious. Hang on, I’ll be right there.”

Jane sighed as she put the phone aside and let her shoulder slump down, burying her face in her hands. She couldn’t even begin to comprehend the shock and the heartbreak, of losing the person she had started to love, the disappointment and the anger. It would have to wait.

She needed to be strong now.

“Mistress Jane?” Her head snapped around to look at Loki, who had soundlessly entered the living room. He was still pale as a sheet, clearly affected by the unrest around him. His eyes were dark and nervous, flickering around the room, unsure of where they were allowed to rest, his shoulders pulled up like he was expecting punishment.

“Just Jane,” She said, offering him another tiny smile, in hopes of gaining his trust. “Come on, have a seat, I’ll make us some tea.”

“I’m afraid Master Thor is not fond of tea. He doesn’t have any. I can offer you coffee, cola, or beer, instead?” 

“Perhaps we should get ourselves some coffee then, huh?” Jane suggested, as she got up from the couch and walked over towards the kitchen. “It’s going to be a long night and I don’t think either one of us is going to get much rest.”

“I am sorry, I’m not allowed coffee,” Loki said apologetically, and Jane didn’t miss how he backed away slightly as she got closer. 

The statement made her furious, but she swallowed down the white-hot anger and forced herself to remain calm. Loki was so skittish and clearly terrified, the tiny bit of trust he seemed to have in her could easily be broken by one flash of anger.

“Then I won’t have any coffee either,” She said. “How about some water? You’re allowed water, right?”

“Yes,” Loki nodded his head, clearly uncomfortable by the situation but he perked up a little when she mentioned water. Jane frowned as she realized that Loki might actually be thirsty. He must have spent all evening in this room. Without water. Without going to the bathroom. 

Her heart just broke all over again and those resistant, uncaring tears threatened to spill again.

“Could you please get me some water then? I’m sorry, I don’t know where the glasses are.”

“Of course, Miss Jane,” Loki answered eagerly, and instead of correcting him for calling her that, Jane just sighed wearily. She didn’t have the strength to continuously ask Loki to stop- and it might be unfair to him too. After he had gone through so much fear and pain tonight, he should at least be allowed to seek comfort in what he knew, without being pressured to give up every rule he was used to obeying. 

Loki poured both of them a glass of water and handed one glass to Jane, his hand was still trembling, but Jane pretended like she didn’t see it. 

“Thank you Loki,” Jane said before she took the first sip. She waited for Loki to drink some water himself, which he did with large, greedy gulps before she went on with the conversation. 

“May I ask, how comes you’re not allowed to drink coffee?”

Loki looked back at her with a puzzled frown, opened his mouth, and closed it again, as he looked for a justification to something that must appear so normal to him now.

“I’m…this is my Master’s coffee,” He began, speaking slowly and stiffly like he wasn’t used to conversation. “It’s a luxury. I don’t deserve it unless I earned a treat.”

“What else would be a treat then?” Jane’s hands were cold with horror as she listened to Loki speak and she took another sip of water, to fight the swelling lump in her throat. 

“Sweets are a treat. Uhm. Warm showers are. Pizza is. Watching a movie is.”

“What’s your favourite treat, Loki?”

Jane watched the shift in Loki’s expression at her question, his features that were so tense and guarded slipped for a moment, to reveal a look of genuine longing, strong enough to make her own heart ache just looking at Loki.

“I like it when Master Thor allows me to sleep in bed with him. But that’s never the case.”

“You like him?” Jane asked, quietly, sympathetically, as she tried to catch a look at Loki’s eyes, but the young man kept avoiding her gaze.

“He’s being so good to me. He cares for me,” Loki said, as he wrapped his hands around the glass he was holding.

“Is that really the case?”

“I don’t know…but he’s all I have.”

Loki’s gaze was fixed to the floor, but Jane watched as a tear fell from his eyes, dropping down onto the pristinely clean tiles. Her heart gave a painful twist and unthinkingly she reached out to lie a comforting hand on Loki’s shoulder. But the moment her hand made contact with him, the young man flinched at the touch and instantly let go of the glass he had been holding, making it shatter into tiny, sharp-edged pieces, as it met the kitchen floor. 

Jane gasped in shock and automatically took a step back. But for the second time that night, the initial shock turned into cold dread, as she watched Loki fall down on his knees, like a puppet whose strings had been cut, pressing his body against the floor, unfeeling to the shards of glass beneath his tender skin.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to,” He apologized breathlessly, more concerned about the awaiting punishment than the sharp pieces of glass glittering on the floor. “Please forgive me. Please. Please tell Master Thor I will accept any punishment he deems fit, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to.”

“Loki, get up!”, Jane stared at the broken figure before her with ice trickling through her veins. Her body was frozen, unable to move and it was for the better, the tiny shards of glass glittering on the floor would have cut her naked feet if she had made one wrong move. 

Loki slowly got up on his feet, as he had been asked to, never meeting Jane’s gaze.

At first, everything seemed okay and Jane’s shoulders slumped in relief to see Loki uninjured. 

But the superficial cuts on his body filled with blood eerily slowly, beading in ruby droplets on his forearms, his face, and a few seconds later, seeping through the fabric of his pants. One shard was stuck in his upper thigh and Jane’s stomach twisted, while Loki seemed not to notice at all, numb to the pain.

“Please,“ Loki whispered, doubtlessly meaning to continue his pathetic apologies but he didn’t get far. 

Out of the corner of his eyes, he caught a movement, and when Jane followed his gaze, she saw Thor standing in the corridor menacingly.

He had never appeared so…big to Jane. 

She had never realized the raw physical power this man held. So far, his large frame had been something comforting, someone to lean against and to cuddle up to, like a large friendly dog. But now Thor's muscles were bulging with the tension he held in his body, his large hands balled into fists and tall enough that his head almost hit the doorframe he now walked through to enter the kitchen, while his eyes were ablaze with anger.

That same friendly dog had turned vicious now, growling and showing its teeth, in a way Jane hadn't expected.

In the presence of his master, Loki automatically dropped back down on the floor, drawing a scream from Jane, who pressed her hands against her mouth, at the senseless terror she faced.

“What did he do?!” Thor growled. “Has he been feeding you lies, did he try to attack you?!”

“No, he didn’t do any of that! He just-“

“Loki!” Thor interrupted with a roar. “What did you do?”

“I’m sorry master. I’m sorry, it was an accident, please punish me however you see fit, please, I’m very sorry,” Loki was babbling, clearly out of it, after all the stress he had to endure tonight, mindless with fear and hurt. His begging only stopped when a jarring sound shot through the apartment and Thor's head snapped around to look at the door- it must have been Darcy, who had rung the doorbell.

Jane’s heart dropped. 

Thor was the first one to move, walking towards the door with large, heavy steps, while Jane hurried behind him, with a few moments of delay, that it took to shake off the shock she was in.

“No, don’t!” Jane shouted and tried to stop Thor by gripping his arm, but Thor simply grabbed Jane’s wrist with enough force to make her gasp in pain.

“You,” He growled looking back at the woman whose face was twisted in a mix of shock and pain and tightened his grip further until Jane could feel her bones grind together in his grip, while he bared his teeth. “You called someone to come to my apartment. You think you can disrespect me, take my property, send me to my room, then invite somebody else over to join you in all of this, like this is your home! You should know your place.”

Thor pushed Jane away and she could only watch helplessly as he took the last few steps towards the door and put his hand on the handle to open it.

“Darcy, get away!” Jane called out in warning, but it was too late.

Thor had already opened the door and Jane caught a glimpse of her best friend behind Thor’s hulking frame.

“How dare you-“ Thor’s voice was thundering through the apartment but it was interrupted by a small buzzing sound that was followed by a much louder, heavy thud as Thor’s body hit the floor a few seconds later, revealing Darcy standing in the doorframe, tightly gripping her taser.

“What?” She asked, staring back at Jane wide-eyed. “He was freaking me out!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Thor is really showing is true colours after all...and Jane begins to see the extent of this thoroughly messed up situation. I swear, I always try to make things better and I'm always thinking "Now I've made it, this is the point where the hurt ends and the comfort starts, I just gotta get in this plot point, or I'll mess up the flow of it"
> 
> And then that plotline turns into another whole chapter in which things are still going to shit.  
> Sorry guys, I really am trying believe me! But I just couldn’t pass the opportunity to have Darcy tase Thor and I think some of you might have liked to read Thor getting just a tiny bit of what he deserves 😂  
> I hope you still enjoyed reading, thank you for all of your support, I absolutely adore reading your thoughts 💕💕


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I updated the tags, please check them out!

“Is my master alright?” Loki asked, for what must have been the twentieth time in the past twenty minutes. 

Jane and Darcy had helped together to drag Thor into the living room, where he was currently closely supervised by Darcy and her trusted taser, while Jane and Loki were now locked into the bathroom.

“He’ll be fine, Loki,” Jane assured. She wasn’t particularly concerned about that asshole of an ex-boyfriend getting shocked. By now she had also made up her mind perfectly clear, that this relationship was over. There was no longer any room for doubt or consideration. 

The focus of her attention was now on Loki who was sitting on the closed toilet, while she sat on the edge of the bathtub, with disinfectant spray, gauze, and tweezers beside her.

“I should be caring for him. I shouldn’t be sitting here, after you have hurt him,” Loki insisted, but he didn’t make a move. He just let Jane take care of him, allowing her touch, even though he had to fight to control the tremble that had taken over his body.

“I’m telling you, he’ll be fine,” Jane sighed as she carefully pulled another tiny shard of glass from Loki’s arm. “Try to look at it this way, if you didn’t let me help you, this might mean serious damage to his property. He wouldn’t like that, huh?”

“No,” Loki admitted softly and lowered his head. “He wouldn’t.”

“So, for now, just let me do this,” Jane looked up, to briefly smile at Loki. It was easy to keep it together while she was caring for him, but the stress of the night was beginning to catch up on her as well. 

Still, she was running from it, wanted to prolong the moment until her inevitable breakdown. There was just no time for that now, she told herself.

She dropped the last piece of bloody glass into the small bowl beside her and carefully checked Loki's arms for any remaining shards. There were none and she carefully wrapped his hands and lower arms in gauze, making all those small but nasty cuts disappear.

“Could you please take off your pants?" She asked. "You’ve been kneeling right on the glass…I need to take a look at your legs.”

Loki was clearly hesitant but following instructions was too deeply ingrained in his mind to disobey a request this concrete. But as he started to take off his pants with stiff, robotic movements, his breath started to come out shallow and quick, a few seconds later, each inhale was accompanied by a startling whistling sound, like Loki’s throat was being squeezed shut and when Jane looked over at him, she saw that his eyes were wide and his mouth gaping open as he struggled to breathe. 

“Hey, Loki,” Jane frowned as she tried to catch his attention. But his glassy eyes wouldn’t focus on her. “One breath after the other, try to stay calm. It’s okay. I won’t do anything to you, I promise. I’ll remove the glass and take care of the wounds and then I’ll back right off. I know you’re scared. But it’ll be okay. Focus on my voice.”

Loki nodded quietly but his breath still came in quiet rasps and his gauze-wrapped hands were balled into tight fists. He only calmed down the slightest bit, when Jane got up with the pretense to throw away the pieces of glass she had already collected, to give Loki some space.

“Are you scared of me?” Jane asked, softly from across the room, a frown drawing her brows together. Now that she said it, it seemed hard to miss. Loki was generally anxious, due to the situation, but that wasn’t enough to explain the way he had flinched away from her touch, dropped his glass, and struggled to breathe while undressing before her- it gave Jane the sneaking suspicion that this had something to do with her in particular, not just because she was a stranger. 

“No, Mistress Jane it’s not that,” Loki assured her hoarsely, but Jane struggled to believe him. 

“I am worried about my master. I believe I should not be obeying you.”

“Do you usually obey your master’s guests?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Well, I’m a guest too,” Jane tried, hoping that by arguing within the logic of Loki’s servitude she could avoid overwhelming him. “So, you’re right to listen to me.”

Loki nodded slowly as he listened to her voice, his lips twitched, as though he was about to argue with her, but he never did. Instead, he slipped out of his blood-stained cotton pants and was left in his underwear, looking terribly vulnerable and exposed. 

Slowly Jane walked closer to take a look. Some shards had pierced the fabric and wounded the skin beneath, but there was more to it.

As Jane looked closer, she noticed the bruises on Loki’s hips and thighs, ghostly echoes of a violently possessive grip, layered on top of each other in shades of purple, blue, green, and yellow and Jane knew exactly who had caused them.

It was the man, whose touch had been so pleasurable to her just hours ago, gentle and patient, the man who had laughed with her, who was kind and light-hearted and had made her fall in love with him.

But still, there was something else. On Loki’s upper thighs, where the glass shards had not reached, were a few pink lines on the otherwise pale skin, wounds that had healed already and were beginning to scar. 

“What’s that?” Jane asked, incapable of keeping the worry from her tone.

“It’s nothing,” Loki assured quickly, once he caught Jane’s gaze resting on the scars, he covered them with a pale hand, but the answer came too suddenly, and Jane narrowed her eyes.

“But it’s not nothing. Did he do that?” 

“No!” Loki blurted out but immediately his tone grew apologetic and quiet. “I’m sorry, Mistress Jane, I didn’t mean for my tone to be so- but Master Thor did not do that.”

“Alright, well then who did?” Jane questioned, as she began to remove tiny, blood-stained pieces of glass from Loki’s legs and cleaned the wounds. 

“It was a misstep of mine,” Loki finally said, after a few moments of tense silence. “I never meant any disrespect.”

“What does hurting yourself have to do with disrespect?” Jane asked as she tried to remove a shard of glass in Loki’s shin, but she found that she couldn’t grip the piece- her hands had begun to tremble.

“My body belongs to my master. I had no right to damage it.”

Jane wanted to say something in response, but she found that she couldn’t get a word out of her throat, not if she wanted to avoid crying.

“Mistress Jane?” Loki asked, his voice bright with alarm. “Have I upset you?”

“No,” She choked out and put aside the tweezers. They were no use until she had calmed down. She couldn’t even make out the pieces of glass anymore, with the way her vision blurred with tears. “It’s okay. Just one moment.”

“You needn’t care for me, Mistress Jane. I can tend to myself on my own, I am sorry if I have inconvenienced you,” Loki spoke softly, clearly attempting to avoid upsetting her further, but his submissive words had the opposite effect. 

The dam broke and the rushing flood crushed Jane with its full weight. The tears were flowing freely down her face now and she buried it in her hands, as sobs wracked her body. 

She wanted nothing more than to stop those useless tears and be there for Loki the way he deserved to, but she couldn’t get herself under control, she kept on sobbing and she kept on crying until her throat hurt, until her eyes felt sore and swollen and her chest ached with the intensity of her sobs.

For a moment she almost got lost in her pain but then she felt a light, cold hand touch her shoulder unexpectedly. The comforting touch was hesitant and brief, only lasting a second before Loki quickly withdrew his hand. 

But it showed effect. Jane’s sobs died down and as she lowered her hands from her face, to look at Loki, she felt a sense of exhausted, painful clarity, that one often gets when there are no tears left to cry.

~

“You’ve cried?” Thor asked, still petulant, still angry, but he couldn’t help the worry for Jane, as she sat in front of him, with her eyes swollen and red, her face blotchy and pale. He loved her after all. Loved her more deeply still, than he had ever expected.

Which was proven by the fact that he didn’t call the police once he recovered from getting tased.

Because the first thing he heard once he woke up were Jane’s sobs echoing through the entire apartment and all the rage he had felt before had subsided, leaving only a bitter aftertaste.

“Was it because of me?”

“Not everything is about you,” Jane scoffed, and Thor felt awkward, chastised like he hadn’t felt since he was a boy.

“Yes, but this _is_ about me,” Thor insisted. “You’re not alright with me and my lifestyle and you’re hurt by that. For some reason.”

“Lifestyle…the fact that you can even call it that.”

“You don’t know anything about this subject,” Thor said bluntly. “You’re just a naïve, idealistic girl who condemns a system she doesn’t understand. What should happen to all those at-risk-people in your opinion? Studies show that they tend to be more unstable, violent, and prone to mental illness. Unleash them on the world and wait for them to hurt others? Pour billions of tax dollars into trying to keep them on track?”

“I know those studies,” Jane looked back at him and Thor was shocked to see that in her reddened eyes he saw nothing but cold disgust. What had happened to all the love that had been there mere hours ago, lighting up those hazel eyes whenever he turned to look at her? 

Thor suppressed a shudder.

He was in the right here. And Jane would come to her senses soon enough.

“If you know them, then you should know that those kinds of people are better off contained!” Thor argued. “They’re taken care of that way. It’s responsible. It’s economic.”

“You’re so dense. Have you ever, just once considered, that all the characteristics you just named aren’t due to their nature, but due to slavery itself? You’d be aggressive and unstable too if you were stripped of everything that makes you human and traumatized a thousand times over. And then those exact effects of slavery are used to justify it. It’s sickening.”

“You don’t know about that,” Thor said but his voice wavered. “Loki attacked me once. With a knife. Was about to attack my parents too. His father is a murderer. He would have followed in his footsteps. He gets aggressive and loses control, I’ve seen it.”

“No!” Jane hissed. “You’re the one who doesn’t know! You say all of these awful, horrid things and you don’t even realize!”

“And you do?” Thor asked mockingly, some stirred-up rage tinting his voice as he spoke. Jane just kept on provoking him, poking the embers of his fury as though asking for the flame to shoot up again.

“I do,” Jane said firmly. “And it’s the reason why I ask you to let Loki come along with me.”

“Jane,” Thor said, voice threateningly low. “We’ve been over this, he doesn't want to go.”

“No. You’ve threatened to put Loki out on the street, without a home or a perspective, we have not been over this at all!”

“But he has no perspective!” Thor growled. 

“You’re wrong again,” Jane said and momentarily she lowered her hard gaze and looked down at her hands. “I’m in contact with some people, who could do something for him. There are organizations. Abroad.”

Thor huffed a laugh. Jane’s request was so ridiculous he could barely be angry at her.

“You’re in contact with illegal trafficking organizations?” Thor looked back at Jane in disbelief. She really was an extremist. How had he not noticed until now? “And what even makes you think that I’d just hand him over to you? Especially since he doesn’t even want to go. You’ve seen him.”

“I’ve seen his scars,” Jane whispered, her gaze flickering down. “You’re breaking him, Thor. Every day a bit more until he won’t even be able to function anymore. And then even you won’t have anything to gain from his abuse anymore.”

“That’s bullshit. You’re manipulated by those radicals and believe anything they say! Your idealism makes you so fucking out of touch with reality!”

“I’m not the one who’s out of touch,” Jane said, her voice low and dangerous in a way Thor had never imagined her to be capable of. 

Thor frowned at Jane then blinked.

“Why do you care so much?” He asked. 

“You couldn’t possibly understand.”

“Let me try,” Thor said, in hopes of finding the real reason for Jane’s obsession. And maybe then, with that out of the way, they could return to normal again.

Jane stayed silent for a long while, the silence was uncomfortable to Thor, but he didn’t dare break it. Finally, she shook her head, looking like she had just made a decision that she was bound to regret.

“You don’t deserve to know this,” She said firmly. “The only reason I’m telling you is because it might help Loki. That’s it.”

“Okay fine,” Thor said with a shrug. “Tell me then.”

“I had a friend once,” Jane began, and just by the beginning of the story, Thor got the sudden realization that he would rather not hear this story after all. His tongue twitched in his mouth, he wanted to stop her from going on- but his vocal cords refused to move. 

“We were the same age. We went to kindergarten together. And then to school. She was my best friend. More like a sister to me. You wouldn’t get it, you’ve always had a bunch of friends and were an only child, I know. But for most of my life, I only had her. Have you ever wished for a sibling Thor?”

“Uhm, yes,” Thor admitted awkwardly. He cleared his throat. “I’ve always wanted a sibling.”

“Then imagine if that wish had come true. I have a little brother, I told you about him, but she was part of the family too. She was at our house most of the time, because her mother was a nurse and had long shifts, day and night. I loved her. We all did.”

Listening to Jane, Thor felt like he had eaten something rotten. Everything within him got defensive as the story went on, urging him to leave the room or to shut her up or even to cover his ears like a child and refuse to listen to another word but still he remained passive, listening even as his stomach twisted. 

“Her mother worked fifty-hour weeks sometimes, didn’t make an awful lot of money though. One night she gave a patient the wrong injection. She wasn’t qualified to give that medication, but her superior asked her to do it anyway. The patient died, her superior made a statement against her, she was charged with manslaughter and got five years in prison. We were fifteen at the time.”

“I think that’s enough,” Thor said hoarsely. “I can imagine where this story goes.”

“No, you can’t,” Jane answered sharply. “Just this time you listen. I don’t care whether or not this makes you uncomfortable.”

Thor stared back at the stone-cold face of his girlfriend, with his mouth gaping open in surprise. She went on, as though he had never interrupted her.

“She had no relatives. The authorities failed to contact her father. And we didn’t meet the legal criteria to adopt- our apartment was too small, there wasn’t enough income. From one day to the other, she found herself in the slavery system. And my mother, she tried to comfort me. She told me that it was only five years. That she would be free again one day and would catch up with life. That things would be fine.”

Jane scoffed and briefly stopped to wipe fresh tears from her eyes.

“She was wrong. I finished high school, started my studies, and worked on my bachelor’s degree, while she was shipped off to serve in some rich asshole’s house, hundreds of miles away from her home. The years passed, and someday she got free. I hoped this would be the point where my mother’s promise would come true. But when I saw her again…she was gone, Thor.”

Jane’s voice broke and she bit down on her lip while keeping a breath trapped within her throat, that would have come out as a sob.

Thor stared at her blankly, quietly hoping that she would start crying making her incapable of going on. But she forced herself to continue, even as every word became a struggle.

“I no longer recognized her. She couldn’t look me in the eyes, she couldn’t stand to sleep in her bed and chose the floor instead. Hardly spoke to me anymore. All day, she did nothing. She stared out of her window, unseeing. She took no joy in anything and my presence was nothing but uncomfortable to her. It wasn’t two weeks after her release that she killed herself.”

Thor was physically ill now and slowly shook his head.

“That’s an exception,” He rasped, willing his voice to be firm. “Tragic. But most slaves aren’t like your friend.”

“But they are Thor,” Jane said, her voice cold and unforgiving, never granting him any relief from the discomfort she put him through. “They are all like her. Young, innocent people, being strategically broken. The chance of them disobeying the law, maybe, someday, often because of the hardships that this fucked up society puts on them, does not justify this…this crime. You’ve got to see this Thor. I know you do. You know that you’re wrong.”

Thor swallowed heavily.

“Even if,” He said and to his own surprise his voice wavered dangerously. Still, he continued. “Even if what you said was true. Which it’s not. And if I handed Loki over to whatever illegal organization you have in mind. Would you stay with me?”

“Thor,” Jane said, the sudden gentleness in her tone felt like a kick to the gut. “You shouldn’t be making this decision based on whether or not I might leave you. You should decide based on whether or not you can stand to look at yourself if one day, you find Loki dead in the apartment, and deep down you’ll know that you’re to blame. None of the statistics saying that slaves have a fragile psychological disposition can save you. None of the political propaganda stating that you were in the right will help you sleep at night. Because you’ll know. And you know even now that you’re breaking him. And that you have no right to.”

Thor’s mouth gaped open. He closed it and opened it again, like a fish above water, struggling and failing to find any words to defend himself.

“But- but he won’t do that,” He finally said, stupidly, and Jane looked at him with a mix of pity and disappointment in her eyes.

“I thought she wouldn’t either,” Jane answered. “But that didn’t stop her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so another (much needed) vibe check for Thor. Also, Jane's background story, which nobody asked for but which I wrote anyways. It's in line with some of your theories that Jane comes from a low-income household herself, explaining her different point of view.
> 
> I really hope you liked the chapter and I can't wait to hear about your thoughts on this one!


	11. Chapter 11

“You know that’s a load of bullshit, right?”

“Yeah, I know,” Thor sighed and ran a hand over his face. The smell of pancakes was coming from the kitchen, but he didn’t feel particularly hungry. In fact, it was making him nauseous.

“Who would have thought she’s crazy. She seemed pretty normal,” Fandral said, shaking his head in dismay.

“Tell me about. She got all up in my face about it. Started screaming and everything. She totally lost it.”

“You’re not seriously considering what she’s saying, right?” His friend looked at Thor from where he was sprawled out on the couch. “You can’t just get rid of your slave for the slim chance of getting some pussy.”

Thor glared at Fandral, who was tone-deaf by default.

“I actually love her Fandral. You probably don’t get it.”

“Well, if she’s that pissed, you probably don’t stand a chance with her anyway. You’ll find someone else…someone who isn't some political extremist. And there’s nothing she can do except for ending the relationship and maybe glare at you if you see her on campus.”

Thor groaned. He was starting to become frustrated with Fandral. Usually, he always felt so understood by his friends but this time around he couldn’t make Fandral see his struggle at all. It was isolating and frustrating.

“I just need her to give me a chance. I would do anything, if only for a chance. If she wants me to give up Loki, fine, I can do that.”

“You really are out of your mind,” Fandral laughed and shook his head. “What would you tell your parents? They paid a fortune for him. You’ll tell them you lost him?”

“I’ll tell them he ran off. Or something,” Thor shrugged his shoulders. “Something like that. I think they would believe me.”

“You’re a god-awful liar, Thor. They’d find you out and then you can explain to mommy and daddy that you sent your ultra-expensive slave off with some weird radical organization. Do you even listen to yourself?”

Fandral looked at Thor incredulous and Thor avoided his gaze annoyed.

Jane had left this morning, once Thor had promised her not to harm Loki and to consider what she had suggested. The two women were reluctant to leave, but Loki was visibly relieved when they were out of the apartment. Their mere presence had made him anxious and set him on edge, even if they had been ridiculously gentle with him, treating him as though he was a fragile little animal.

Which he wasn’t. 

Thor knew Loki well enough, to know that he was a stubborn, tough little thing, who could very well take whatever he was given, even if his big pleading eyes often tried to convince him otherwise.

Thor didn’t want to give Loki away. He was doing a good job, he clearly wanted to stay, and he made Thor’s life a lot more pleasant. But what was all of this worth if Jane wouldn’t even speak to him anymore if he held onto Loki?

Loki entered the living room, balancing a tray with two plates of pancakes, a pot of coffee, and orange juice on it, and put it down on the living room table between the two men. 

His hands were still wrapped in gauze, a cut on his forehead was taped together, but he fulfilled every task without a sound of complaint coming from him. If anything, he seemed more eager than ever to get his master’s approval. Stupid Jane and her stupid friend must have frightened him with their ideas of taking him away. 

“Come on Thor, look at him,” Fandral grinned as Loki sat down a plate of pancakes in front of him. “I bet she won’t be making you pancakes. And I also bet she wouldn’t let you do any of that freaky stuff to her. Maybe you’d get a blowjob on your birthday and apart from that it’s boring missionary sex and nagging for eternity. She seems pretty naggy. And that’s if she’ll even want to stay with you after this.”

“Fandral, shut up!” Thor growled. “I don’t care about pancakes and sex right now!”

“Weird, because that’s all that’s on my mind,” Fandral laughed and shook his head, then went on in a more pacifying tone. “Come on, take it easy, big guy. If that doesn’t convince you, think of your parents. They’ll be furious with you. They invested another small fortune into his training and now you ‘lose’ him? Odin is scary as hell. He’ll be so mad at you. And they won’t be getting you another slave any time soon, I can promise you that.”

Thor huffed. A throbbing pain had settled in his head and despite drinking almost a gallon of cold water and taking two aspirin, it just wouldn’t go away. It was like his skull was being split apart. 

And Fandral’s babbling was making it all worse.

He was right of course in everything he said. 

But the discussion still made Thor so unreasonably angry. He had never doubted that he could have both. Jane to love and Loki to use. Life could have been perfect.

And now he was caught in a gamble, where he would lose one of those people for certain and with a bit of bad luck, he would be left without either of them.

It was frustrating. Maddening. And none of the logical reasoning seemed to get through to him to ease his inner conflict.

“I remember when Loki was away for a few months. Your apartment sucked. And that’s coming from me. You think Jane will scrub your toilet? Cook you dinner? Think again. She has all those big ambitions as a space-scientist, she’d probably make you do all the work.”

Fandral was speaking through a mouthful of pancake. He swallowed and beckoned Loki, who had been kneeling a few feet away, closer. He crawled up to Fandral, who had an indulgent smile spread on his face. 

“Come on sweetheart, you’ll get a little treat. Open up your mouth, there we go. Now suck.”

Thor watched as Fandral shoved his fingers, which had been sticky with syrup into Loki’s open mouth, who was now eagerly sucking on them. 

“Just look at him Thor,” Fandral said as he ran his fingers through Loki’s hair in what would have been an almost affectionate gesture, if he didn’t twist his strands in his hand a moment later, making the slave whimper softly. “He’s sweeter than ever. The training worked, you’ve got the best slave money can buy. You shouldn’t even consider giving him away.”

“But I am considering,” Thor said darkly. He looked down at his hands before he went on in a quieter tone. “What if he- Jane said that if anything were to happen to him, I’d be to blame.”

“Well, duh. As a master you’re responsible, that’s kind of the thing,” Fandral said as he withdrew his fingers from Loki’s eager mouth and instead reached down to twist Loki’s nipple, making the young slave wince. “Those people, need someone to take responsibility for them. They don’t make it on their own, especially the ones who are enslaved for life. You’re basically doing community service and look how sweet the payoff is.”

Thor huffed, barely even glancing at Fandral and Loki.

Fandral pushed his fingers deeper into Loki’s throat, groaning softly at the lack of resistance that he was met with.

“You mind if he sucks me off?”

“Yes, I do mind!” Thor growled. “You’re being impossible! This is serious!”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it, it’s all so serious, such a crisis. Should you live a comfortable life with the perfect slave and get dumped by some random chick, or give him up and get dumped anyways, only now everyone is mad at you and you have to take care of your own shit, oh no, the choice is so hard to make,” Fandral said in a mocking tone until finally, Thor had enough. 

He got up from his chair with an angry shout, his eyes blazing with fury as he towered over Fandral.

“Fuck off!” He roared and Fandral was quick to scramble off the couch, lifting his hands in a pacifying gesture.

“Easy, easy, I was just joking. Come on, it wasn’t that deep.”

“Leave now. I won’t say it again,” Thor pressed out between gritted teeth.

Fandral lifted his brows and shook his head, mumbled something under his breath but he was smart enough to do as he was told before Thor could get any more worked up. 

“Let me know when you’ve come to your senses again,” Fandral called out from a safe distance when he was already by the opened door and then was quick to leave, without waiting for Thor to reply.

~

Thor still stood in the living room his nostrils flared with rage while his hands were clenched into tight fists at his side and Loki watched him with fear bubbling up in his stomach.

Now that Fandral was gone, the only advocate he had had this entire time had left and Loki felt utterly alone. Fandral had been trying to get his master to keep Loki but now he had been sent away and Loki was scared of what Thor might do now.

“Loki. Sit down on the couch,” Thor demanded, and Loki did as he was told, with only a moment of hesitation.

He wasn’t usually allowed on the furniture if it wasn’t for him to be fucked on and his face betrayed confusion and fear but he did as he was told nonetheless. Thor sat down opposite of him on his chair, one of the rare instances where they were both on the same level, looking at one another.

Loki, of course, was the first to lower his gaze.

“I guess you’ve been listening to the conversation and know what’s going on.”

“I do, master. I apologize, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, I will accept any punishment you chose.”

“No, no it’s fine,” Thor sighed and ran his fingers through his tousled hair. The anger that had been almost tangible a few moments ago, had dissipated like smoke. Thor seemed almost deflated, his shoulders hanging down, his expression unreadable, even to Loki who knew how to guess his every wish. 

“I just want to ask you a few questions. And don’t you dare lie to me.”

“I would never, master,” Loki said genuinely. He was so pale, that there was no difference in shade between his skin and his lips only the dark circles beneath his eyes stood out with painful clarity, and his bony fingers anxiously fidgeted with the gauze, even though he tried to force himself to stay still.

“Do you want to leave?”

“No!” Loki was quick to answer, the word fell from his lips with bright desperation clinging to it. “No. Of course, whatever you do with me, is your decision alone, master but I would never want to leave your side. I am sorry if I displeased you, I will do anything to make up for it, please just let me stay and prove it to you.”

Thor made an annoyed sound at the pathetic babbling and cut Loki off with a movement of his hand.

“Okay, I get it, you want to stay,” He said impatiently with a nod of his head. “But are you happy here?”

“What?” Loki gaped at his master stupidly. He knew an answer was expected from him, but he could hardly come up with one, the question was too unexpected. “I- If I have ever appeared ungrateful to you, please, I’m sorry-“

“No!” Thor said sharply and Loki flinched. “That’s not what I meant. You told me that you get sad sometimes. That you got sad when you hurt yourself. Does that still happen?”

“No master Thor, I have not cut myself ever since you have told me not to,” Loki answered truthfully. 

But Thor didn't know that it was the first time since Loki had left the training centre that he had evaded the truth- while he had never again dared to slide another blade across his skin, he did prod and poke at the bruises his master gave him, hitting himself on the same spots, which meant that the bruises never faded. But Thor had yet to notice this lack of healing. 

He was too busy causing more hurt himself.

Of course, Loki had tried to stop. To be good for his master.

But when Thor was gone for so long and Loki could no longer breathe in the heavy solitude of the apartment, he couldn’t help himself, and even though guilt clung to him and his stomach twisted, the forbidden pain brought him momentary relief.

“And do you still get…sad?” Thor asked, tilting his head to the side, his blonde brows drawn together thoughtfully, making his blue eyes seem that much darker.

Loki swallowed heavily, then slowly nodded his head. 

He couldn’t evade a question that direct, even if he would have tried. His conditioning didn't allow it.

“Yes, master. Sometimes I still get sad. Or anxious. I don’t know what to do to stop it.”

Thor leaned against the backrest of his chair and looked up at the ceiling for a few minutes, during which Loki fidgeted on the couch, struggling to fight the uncomfortable feeling that filled him now. It was more than anxiety. More than dread. It was a sense of doom that slowly grew within him.

“But-“ Thor had to clear his throat before he went on. His usually steady and clear eyes were wandering restlessly through the room now. “But you’ve never considered ending your life, right?”

Loki’s eyes widened in shock and his heart sank as the deepest and most secret feeling he held was put out in the open like that.

He knew, that even without saying anything, his expression had answered the question.

The silence spread out between them, grew heavier with each passing second and Loki prayed, that Thor would not be repeating his question, that he would let it go, because Loki was trying to be good. He tried so badly, he couldn’t help it, he didn’t know how to stop it. Those dark thoughts would creep up on him, despite him knowing that he must not dream of breaking his master’s property- but they granted him an eerie sense of much-needed relief.

Hope even.

He couldn’t get anything right. His master was displeased with whatever he did, and Loki could never get him to give him back a sliver of the affection he craved. Every day was dread. He didn't just get sad anymore. The sadness had become the norm. And once Jane had stepped into Thor’s life and his master left him on his own for most of the time, it were these forbidden thoughts that kept him company, and granted him a sense of comfort, though it was laced with sadness and guilt.

His mind slipped to this dark place on its own, even though it didn’t feel dark to him at all. It felt light. An answer to all his troubles, to ease his sorrow.

“Loki,” Thor said, an undefinable expression on his handsome face like he would rather go without knowing but couldn’t turn away anymore. His previously flickering gaze was now resting heavily on Loki. It burnt like hot iron. “Answer me.”

“Sometimes…sometimes I think of it,” Loki admitted, his voice quivering almost imperceptibly. “But please. It doesn’t lessen my loyalty to you, it doesn’t diminish my sense of duty, I understand that as your possession, my life belongs to you.”

Thor was still staring at him and it was starting to become impossible to bear.

Loki’s stomach had turned into a black hole, empty and dark, as a coldness spread throughout his entire body. Had he just delivered Thor the final reason to send him away?

When he dared to look up at Thor, a strange mix of emotion twisted his master’s face and he looked at Loki like he had never looked at him before. At first, Loki couldn't pinpoint what it was. It had been so long since Loki had experienced it…but after a few moments, he realized that Thor looked at him like a person.

“Jane said something last night. About siblings,” Thor cleared his throat. His voice had been weirdly tight and his eyes had gone glassy. “It won’t get out of my head. I’ve always wanted a sibling. A little brother. Must be the only thing I wanted that I never got.”

Loki looked back at Thor unsurely, his eyes were magnetic, and despite knowing that he was not meant to look directly at his master for too long, he couldn’t avert his gaze. Did Thor expect a reply? Or did he simply expect Loki to listen to him?

Loki stuck to the safer choice and remained silent.

“You have siblings, don’t you Loki?”

“I do,” Loki said hoarsely, his mind racing and stumbling to figure out why Thor wanted to know. What he wanted to hear so that Loki could please him better.

“Older or younger?”

“Two brothers. Older. By almost ten years,” Loki answered truthfully. “They’re twins.”

“Couldn’t they have taken custody during the trial?”

“No. They have moved out years ago and cut ties with my father. We weren’t close.”

Thinking about them now, for the first time in so long, Loki found that their faces had become blurry in his memory. He could barely picture them anymore- and it didn’t matter. He would never see them again. Just like he would never see his father again. He was meant to live by Thor’s side if only he would be allowed to.

“Loki, I don’t think you can stay here with me.”

Loki’s face dropped. Everything felt like it was first tilting, then falling. Not hitting the ground yet but approaching it at dizzying speed. 

Loki slid off the couch and onto the floor, into the position that had become so natural to him by now. On his knees, pressing his body against the floor in a show of desperate submission.

He couldn’t even speak. His throat was squeezed shut painfully tight, he could only pray quietly for this moment to not be real and for Thor to change his mind.

“Please,” He choked out. “Please, Master, I will do anything. I’m sorry. You won’t ever have to look at me again. I can stay out of sight. I can be so quiet you’ll never notice me again. I’m sorry, please, please let me stay…”

“Loki…” Thor sighed. “Get up.”

Loki did, his body entirely numb. He felt like he was drawn by strings, like a puppet. If it wasn’t for his inability to disobey an order, he wouldn’t have been able to get up from the floor.

“I think it’s for the better,” Thor tried and when Loki risked a glance upward at him his master looked deeply uncomfortable and…sympathetic. But the image of his face blurred as Loki's eyes filled with tears. “There will be people to take care of you. I think. Better than me. Maybe you’ll stop being so sad. Maybe you’ll stop having those thoughts about dying.”

“Master,” Loki whimpered pathetically, as tears flew freely over his cheeks, dripping down his chin. His face was scrunched up, displaying a pain as intense as he had never felt it before. “Please. I’m only living for you. I don’t want this. I wouldn’t know what to do.”

“You’ll figure it out,” Thor said comfortingly but he didn’t sound convinced.

“But I love you,” Loki choked out, his voice broken. Hearing his own words made his heart feel like it was physically breaking. “You’re all I have. Don’t make me. Please.”

“I’m your master," His tone that had been so sympathetic a moment ago, had become hard again. "You do as I say, and I get to choose what I think is best for you. You just have to follow my command the way you always did.”

Loki could only sob in response as he crumpled on the floor, with nothing left to keep him upright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how I told you that things have to get worse before they can get better? Well, they are still getting worse...but I promise, I am actually working on approaching the "better" part. Slowly. 
> 
> But on the bright side, Thor seemed to have a serious change of mind, finally? Even though that still doesn't make him a very empathetic and sensitive person...
> 
> Thank you so much for sticking to the story, I can't wait to hear from you about your thoughts and ideas!


	12. Chapter 12

“Where is he now?” The man with the short blonde hair and piercing, steel-grey eyes sat opposite of Thor on the living room couch, next to Jane.

When Thor had pictured the kind of people who fanatically tried to undermine the slavery system, or the smugglers, who illegally brought slaves across the border, he would never have imagined them to look like this.

Calm. Collected. The definition of righteous. 

Thor had also never in his entire life felt anywhere near as uncomfortable as he did at this moment, with both of their eyes on him, judging him. Despising him.

None of the natural charm, that usually made him so likable made them warm up to him in the slightest. Not even Jane, who had been so full of love towards him mere days ago held any kind of sympathy in her gaze.

“Uhm, he’s in the bedroom. He has a fever.”

“Hm. It’s better if he’s not here for this part of the conversation anyway. I guess he must be very attached to you?” The man, Clint Barton, asked with a raised brow. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess he is,” Thor said, rubbing the back of his neck, which had heated up. His hands were sweaty, and he wished that he had never invited these two people into his apartment.

And they wouldn’t have been allowed to enter if it hadn’t been for his explicit agreement. He had given them this power but now he felt entirely powerless. For the hundredth time already, Thor wondered why he put himself through this.

“Did that attachment form on its own, or was it enhanced by conditioning processes?”

Thor's gaze flickered from the man's hard face, over to Jane. How could he answer this question without sounding like a complete asshole to Jane?

“Uhm, yeah Loki was…violent. He went through a bit of conditioning to change that,” Thor answered. He now kept his arms crossed over his broad chest defensively, as Clint and Jane shared a brief look. Barton appeared unsurprised, while the shock was clear on Jane’s beautiful face.

“That is going to make this entire project a lot more difficult. But it’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before,” Barton said with a thoughtful nod of his head. “So, Loki has gone through professional conditioning. Was it extensive?”

“I think so? He’s been there for three months.”

“Where?”

“It’s called Institute for Behaviour Modification and Cognitive Reorganization,” Thor said, remembering the sign outside of the complex, which had been surrounded by concrete walls and razor wire. Somehow the memory made a shiver trickle down his spine.

At the answer, even Barton, whose expression had remained neutral this entire time, raised both of his brows.

“He spent three months there?”

“Yes?”

“Alright,” Clint slowly nodded his head and looked over at Jane, who was now frowning deeply. “This changes a few things. The institute is very effective, I’ve dealt with their victims in the past. He might need one on one for a while.”

He turned back towards Thor before continuing, without explaining what that meant. 

“The fever is probably a response to the enormous emotional stress he's under. Perhaps even a subconscious attempt to stay with you. I’ve experienced it a few times. Leaving is often extremely traumatic. But we only have a certain time frame. The entire operation is planned, and we need to leave today or risk getting caught at the border,” The man explained. 

“So, uh, how will that look like?” Thor asked, because now that Loki was about to leave, sick and weak, crying and begging almost without pause, he was starting to feel a strange bit of concern, the need to know what would become of him.

Clint raised a brow.

“I shouldn’t be telling you. But you’re actually cooperating, that’s rare and the information you’re giving me is valuable in helping Loki,” Barton said. “So, I’ll let you in on some of the secrets of the trade. The backbench of the car I brought can be lifted up and is hollow inside. Loki will have to curl up in there and stay still until we passed the border. Well, two borders that is. All of your neighbouring countries either have a legal slavery system themselves, or an extradition treaty with your country. The drive will be four hours before Loki can come out.”

Thor stared at him, unable to process what he had just heard.

That sounded…claustrophobic. 

He wanted to know more. Wanted to argue for there to be a better way, but Barton went on with the conversation, without giving him anything more.

“Now I have some more questions for you. What kind of tasks was Loki given?”

“Uh…housekeeping. Cooking and stuff,” Thor explained with a shrug, but Barton’s eyes seemed to look right through his thick skull.

“Yeah sure. Domestic servitude. Is he trained as a pleasure slave also?”

Jane’s expression hardened hearing the word and she and Thor momentarily made eye contact. Thor was quick to avert his gaze, but he still caught a glimpse of disgust in her eyes.

“Uhm. Yeah.”

“Okay. You think he might have any specific triggers?”

“No…no, I don’t think so,” Thor said vaguely. If the situation had been uncomfortable before, it was starting to become outright unbearable now. 

“Were you his only abuser?”

Abuser. The word made the hair stand up at the back of Thor’s neck. A wave of anger was beginning to swell within him. That was not what he was. This was wrong. Outrageous. He was not the one breaking the law here- but he wisely swallowed his anger down, even though his eyes were still blazing with it. 

If Barton noticed, he didn’t seem impressed.

“No,” Thor answered stiffly. 

“Apart from you, have his other abusers been mostly male?”

“No,” Thor said and caught the way Jane’s eyes widened in disbelief. It was torture looking at her this way. He wished he could tell her to leave the room, but he knew she shouldn't do that. “No. Uhm. A friend of mine, she took it pretty far with him once. And his trainer at the center was a woman. He’s been kind of jumpy since then. Does that make a difference?”

“Well, on the downside, he probably expects everyone to be an abuser at this point. On the upside though, that might mean he’s not scared of me any more than he would be of anybody else, so that’s good,” Clint explained with a shrug. “If you can think of something else that might trigger him let me know. Again, it helps us in helping him. Is there anything else in his behaviour that you find noteworthy? That you think we should know?”

“Well, yeah he self-harmed. Once.”

“Sure. You think it was just once. Go on.”

“He said he gets sad sometimes,” Thor explained, ignoring Barton’s passive-aggressive remark. “Sounds like depression maybe.”

“Most likely depression,” Clint said with a thoughtful nod. “Go on.”

Thor felt the rage rising up again, threatening to unload on this man, who had walked into his home, without the slightest bit of decency or even gratitude, asking personal questions and clearly judging him, ordering him around like he had any right- it was a struggle, but Thor composed himself.

Not in front of Jane.

“He told me he’s thinking of killing himself.”

Jane squeezed her eyes shut hearing that lifting a hand to her lips like she was going to be sick, and Barton looked over at her, concerned.

“You okay?” He asked with a gentleness, that stood in harsh contrast to the way he had spoken to Thor, cool and controlled. She nodded in response, as she opened her eyes and got up, still holding her hand above her mouth. 

“I’ll be right back,” She pressed out, as she made her way over to the bathroom. Thor followed her with his eyes, his heart clenching in longing for her. But she didn’t even look back at him.

For a moment he contemplated following her but Barton’s voice interrupted his thoughts.

“So, he’s depressed, suicidal, has a history of self-harm, and has gone through very extensive conditioning. All of that is not unusual but it is going to make things more difficult. The drive will be hard on him. He’s probably acutely suicidal now. You didn’t leave him with anything potentially dangerous?”

“Uh-“ Thor looked back at Clint, feeling suddenly very dumb. “I don’t know?”

Barton sighed.

“It is very important that you don’t let him close to anything potentially dangerous now. Knives, belts, ropes, pills. It’s crucial, do you understand?” Barton asked and Thor just despised the way he was being treated like an idiot. And yet he was unable to stop it.

Maybe he was an idiot. Because until now he hadn’t even considered keeping Loki away from any of those things, but after Barton had mentioned it, it seemed obvious.

“I’ll go check up on him,” Barton said and got up from the couch. “Where is the bedroom?”

“Second door to the left,” Thor answered numbly, and Clint nodded, before he made his way over, the sound of his heavy combat boots, which he hadn’t even offered to take off, echoing through the apartment.

~

Clint knocked at the door. 

Waited for a few moments, then entered. 

He found Loki curled up on a mat at the foot of the king-sized bed, pale and shivering, his cheeks unhealthily red, eyes unfocused but panicked as they followed Clint, who sat down on the floor, a few feet away from Loki.

“Hey,” He said, offering a brief smile. “I’m Clint. You must be Loki, right?”

He didn’t get a reaction, much less an answer. Loki only stared at him, wearily, suspiciously. 

“I’ll be the one to bring you over the border tomorrow. I can’t imagine you’re looking forward to it.”

“Please,” The young man whispered hoarsely. “Please let me stay. Please talk to my master, I’ve promised him to be good. I’d do anything. Please.”

Clint looked at him sympathetically.

“It’s not about that Loki,” He said, even though he knew his words probably hardly had an effect on the gaunt, sickly man. “But I know why you would think that. Doesn’t make sense any other way, does it?”

No reaction.

Clint sighed, but he was used to monologuing, especially in the beginning.

“I felt the same way. When I was taken away to freedom, I threw up at least a dozen times. It was nasty. I would have done anything, literally anything, to stay with my owner at the time,” Clint went on, and as expected that part caught Loki’s attention.

His feverish eyes grew a little more focused, a little curious as they looked at him in a whole new way.

“But I couldn’t have stayed. No matter how much I wanted to. I would have died,” Clint explained and pushed down the black turtleneck he wore to reveal the scarring surrounding his neck. Loki’s eyes grew even wider, as they stared at the scar tissue. Healed, but still raised in relief against the healthy skin surrounding it.

“An infection under the collar, where my skin had rubbed raw. It hurt but my owner at the time didn’t care for it. He had no idea that the sepsis would have killed me a few days later if I hadn’t been rescued.”

“You were a slave?” Loki asked hoarsely, trying out the words carefully. Past tense. 

“Yeah,” Clint smiled again. “I was someone else before. Then I was a slave. And now I’m somebody else again. Can’t say it didn’t affect me…I probably wouldn’t be doing this job, if it wasn’t for my past. But it’s not all I am anymore, you see?”

“I see,” Loki whispered, even though the utter confusion in his glassy eyes meant that he most likely hadn’t processed the information still. 

“It’s not much different with you,” Clint continued softly, searching Loki’s face for even a flicker of understanding. “You can’t stay here. It poisons you. And it will be miserable to break free, hell, I know how fucking miserable it is. But it gets better.”

They looked at one another and for the briefest of moments, Clint thought that he might have gotten through to Loki. But that illusion was shattered the next second.

“Please…” Loki whispered again, his eyes filling with tears before he went on begging as if Clint hadn’t said anything. “My master. Please help me change his mind. I have nothing to offer him. Please help me. I’ll do anything. I will pleasure you. I know how to. I can make you feel good. But please talk to him. Please. I don’t want to go…”

Clint sighed.

That part was familiar too, the hollow phrases that they were programmed to say, the lack of understanding in the face of the agony they were in. And the begging. The fucking begging.

But Clint didn’t blame them at all for it.

He had been lucky he hadn’t gone through any targeted conditioning besides the regular training, and it had been bad enough for him.

And that conditioning was insidious, he had seen the results often enough. He was willing to bet that the female trainer Thor had mentioned was the red-haired, cold-hearted demon he had met once in the past, as he tried to free a young girl.

This mission had been a lot messier than this one and even he shuddered thinking of it.

“We are going to leave tomorrow,” Clint said, firm but not unkind. “There will be no turning back from this and it will be very hard for you…but we have to leave. Do you know that?”

Loki only whimpered in response and buried his face in his hands. It was no use talking to him any longer, he was too caught up in his misery, and Clint giving him a prep talk wouldn’t do anything about it.

Clint got up from his position on the floor to check the room for potentially dangerous objects. He took a glass of water standing on the nightstand, as well as a few ties and belts with him before he turned to leave the room.

“Goodbye Loki, see you tomorrow,” He tried gently but there was no answer, besides an agonized whimpering and Clint left with a heavy sigh.

Returning to the living room Clint saw Thor and Jane who were sitting apart from each other, both of them making a point of not looking at the other, but it was Thor whose gaze still flickered over at her every now and again with a sense of poorly concealed longing.

“He’s miserable,” Clint stated, as he sat back down on the couch, putting his collection of dangerous objects on the coffee table. “Went the good old I’ll-let-you-fuck-me-if-you-help me route. This will be extremely difficult for him. Thor, you’re probably the only one who can make it a bit easier on him.”

“Me?” The man asked stupidly, and Clint had to fight back the urge to roll his eyes. This huge man-child of a slave owner just aggravated him in a way he seldomly was, even though he actually cooperated, which was a rare occurrence.

“Yes. You. He’s literally programmed to adore you.”

“Uhm, sure. What do I need to do?”

“Those few hours in the car might the loneliest and most miserable he will ever experience. If you have something that might give him a bit of comfort or serve as a distraction, let him bring it along. And while that might sound weird, maybe something that smells of you. So that he doesn’t feel completely abandoned by the person he devoted his life to.”

“Yeah, I can do that,” Thor said with a nod of his heavy head.

“And if at all possible, try to be a bit nice to him. Try to let him know that you’re not just disposing of him like garbage, that would really help.”

“I’m not!” Thor said defensively. “I’m not the one who insisted on giving him away!”

“No. But you’ve probably treated him like garbage this entire time, so that’s how it comes across to him now.”

~

“Loki?” Thor asked as he entered the room. Clint and Jane had both left a few minutes ago, Jane with a greenish tint on her face and reddened eyes, Barton with another warning about keeping Loki away from anything that might be dangerous.

The conversation with them had been difficult but it was even more difficult to see Loki now. Shivering and sick on the bedroom floor. 

“Master,” Loki’s weary head moved up, his glassy eyes trying to focus on him. “Master, please if I may speak, I had an idea.”

“What?” Thor asked with a frown. 

“I could be- you could rent me out. You don’t have to give me away,” Loki started to speak feverishly, his words coming out in a rush. “I’ve heard it before. You rent me out, and I make you money, and you won’t have to look at me again or touch me again if you don’t want me anymore. But I could earn my keep. I’ll sleep…in the supply closet. Yes. I won’t come out, you won’t see or hear me, but please, let me stay.”

Thor was starting to become nauseous listening to Loki’s twisted reasoning.

“Loki, I’m not a pimp,” Thor said, disgusted. “You think I want to coordinate you getting fucked by seedy people?”

Loki’s impossibly wide eyes grew a bit larger still.

“Oh. Of course not. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, it was stupid of me, I shouldn’t have suggested, please punish me, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. “

It was painful to look at Loki suffer this way. Before it had never bothered Thor, it had never gotten to him. Some part always assumed that Loki was just acting. Or that he deserved it. 

But what Jane had said to him, had affected him more deeply than he had thought possible. All this talk about death and family and siblings had messed with his head. And at one fatal point during their conversation a few days ago, Thor had briefly wondered what things would have been like if he had grown up with a little brother. And if that little brother had been Loki.

It was jarring.

And he hadn’t been able to look at Loki the way he did before.

He cursed Jane and her stupid guilt-tripping for manipulating him like this, but he couldn’t undo it.

“Hey, Loki,” Thor said, and his voice grew a bit softer, as he looked at the miserable creature before him. “You know, why don’t we have ourselves a nice evening?”

Loki looked at him warily and Thor went on. 

“You’ve earned a treat. You’ve been really, very very good.”

“A treat?” Loki repeated unsurely, but clearly drawn in by the promise. “But…I have been useless today. You want to give me away. I haven’t been good.”

“That’s not the reason why you’re leaving. You’re leaving so that you can get better. Feel better.”

“Is it like the center? And I will come back someday?” Loki asked hopefully.

“No, it’s not like that,” Thor sighed, frustrated. “Let’s just focus on tonight, okay?”

“Yes. Tonight. Of course, master, I’m sorry.”

“I was thinking we could get pizza? Watch a movie maybe. How would you like that?”

“Yes,” Loki answered breathlessly. “I’d like that. Very much.”

A while later they were both sitting on the couch, two pizza boxes on the table in front of them, while a movie was playing on the screen, which Loki watched utterly engulfed. It only now got to Thor, that it must be the first movie in a long time that Loki had seen from start to finish, without interruption.

It was heart-breaking to see in a way. The way he was huddled up in his blanket, still hot with fever, that had lessened just the tiniest bit during the evening and watching the movie with utter fascination. Once it was done, Thor had to stop Loki from trying to tidy up the living room and instead guided him to the shower, where he let Loki undress and helped wash him with a cloth and warm water that made Loki shiver pleasantly. 

And when Thor helped Loki into the bedroom and told him that he would be allowed to sleep with him in bed tonight, the young man started to cry pitifully, and Thor could hardly get him to calm down again. 

Even once they had turned off the lights and Loki was lying next to him in the large bed, Loki was still sniffling softly.

“Master?” 

“Hm?”

“I’m not going to die, am I?”

Thor frowned confused, looking over at Loki, but he could only see the outline of his sharp profile in the darkness.

“No? Why would you think that?”

Thor could hear how Loki swallowed, licked his lips like he was unsure on whether or not he should be voicing his thoughts. He did. And it made an icy feeling spread in the pit of Thor’s stomach.

“You know when you have to put down a dog and you let him eat burgers and get on the furniture on the last day? That’s how I’m feeling.”

“Wait what?” Thor asked and propped himself up on his elbows. “That’s not at all what’s happening. Actually…that’s the exact opposite of what’s happening.”

Silence.

“I’m sorry, master. This was ungrateful of me.”

“Just…you’re not going to die. Let’s focus on that.”

“Of course. I’m sorry,” Loki whispered. But after a moment of hesitation, he went on. “Will you be getting another slave, master? Once I’m gone?”

Thor sighed- he wanted to snap at Loki and tell him to shut up. He would have done so immediately and then he could go to sleep and not have to worry about all those dark questions circling around his slave’s restless mind. 

But he couldn’t quite get himself to do that.

It was Loki’s last night after all. He could stay up a few moments longer.

“I don’t think so,” He answered. “My parents won’t get me another one after that. And besides that…never mind. I just don’t think I will get another one.”

“Master?”

Loki asked again and Thor hummed in response, his eyes already closed.

“Would you…if I may, would you like to fuck me?” 

Thor’s eyes snapped open again and he looked over at the dark blotch that was Loki. His eyes shimmered in the dark, wide and open but the rest of his face remained a mystery. Somehow it made Thor shudder.

Heat did stir in Thor’s groin at the idea. But now there was also cold dread dampening the feeling of arousal. 

He remembered Barton and Jane looking at him accusingly, making him feel like he was some kind of monster and the memory made him recoil from himself.

But then again, he had always liked fucking Loki. And Loki had liked it too. And Thor became melancholic, thinking that he might never be able to do that again. 

“No,” Thor said after the two opposing feelings had battled for dominance within him for quite a while. It was hard to say, and he became sad hearing the word echo through the dark, feeling the lithe body beside him slump in disappointment. 

There were so many things he wanted to tell Loki now.

That he would miss his company. That things wouldn’t be the same without him. That he wasn’t sure how to go on without Loki around.

But he couldn’t put any of those things into words, even though he felt the pressure to say them.

The pressure was building up, became painful, but still, his stupid brain failed to voice any of the things he felt.

“Just go to sleep Loki,” Thor finally said, his voice heavy and tight. “You have a long day ahead of you tomorrow.”

“I love you,” Loki whispered brokenly. 

But Thor didn’t answer. He pretended to sleep, while Loki turned and twisted in bed for hours, struggling to stay still until finally Thor couldn’t take it any more and lied one arm around the young man, pulling him closer towards his chest, where finally, he calmed down and went to sleep after only a few short minutes.

It was Thor who stayed awake the whole night, unable to find a moment of rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this begins to answer some questions as to how Loki will go on living at this point? Poor Loki, everything still is so hard for him...and Thor tries to be marginally less of an awful person, which doesn't make him a good one by a long shot....but it's better than nothing, right?
> 
> And here we go with another character that the MCU neglected, even though Clint still (rightfully) holds the position of a fan favourite. I just love including characters, you'll probably see a few more! Thank you for sticking to the story, as always I'm super curious to know what you think!


	13. Chapter 13

Clint did his best not to look away like he had been taught to and held Steve’s gaze instead. 

They were equals. He had the right to look him in the eye.

Sometimes it was easy. Sometimes it was still a conscious effort, that took a lot out of him, like today.

“Are you sure?” Steve asked, his dark blue eyes doubtful, blonde brows drawn together into a frown. “It might not be a good idea if you say I look remarkably similar to his main abuser.”

“Yes, but he was conditioned at the institute. Their methods involve a kind of fucked up punishment and reward system, I’m not gonna go into detail, but you looking similar might be a plus. We could make the conditioning work for us, by giving us a basis of trust and comfort to work with,” Clint argued. He was being rather mouthy and that too was still an inner struggle, even after all these years.

_Don’t talk back. Be quiet. Do as you’re told. You have nothing of value to say._

The voice was still whispering in his head, but Clint had gotten remarkably good at simply pushing it aside. Fuck you, voice. I’ll say whatever I want.

They both looked over at Coulson, who had been listening quietly so far.

“Well,” The man began. “I see your point, Clint. But working based on the conditioning is a double-edged sword…we don’t know what exactly they’ve done to him over there. We might risk making things worse, and it’s hard to undo a mistake like that. Especially with one-on-one care like you suggested, any negative effects will be amplified.”

_You’re stupid. You’re worthless. Everything you say is trash. I’ll cut your tongue out-_

“Well, he’s scared of women,” Clint continued to argue. “The woman who contacted us, Foster, told me he was noticeably anxious in her presence. Matches what Odinson told us. Giving him to a woman is off the table. And Steve’s the only person who has availability for one-on-one care right now. I’m just saying it could be an advantage. Steve is different in all the right ways.”

“I’m not sure,” Steve’s frown had deepened. “It might keep him stuck in his old patterns. Maybe it’s better to keep him in emergency care for a few days until someone else is available.”

_Shut up. Shut up. Shut up._

“I’ve got a feeling about this,” Clint insisted again and now he fixed Coulson with his gaze. He was sure about this. And just as expected Coulson sighed and nodded his head, after looking at him for a few seconds.

“Fine,” He agreed and turned to look at Steve. “Steve, you have to be very observant this time around. Pay close attention to Loki’s reactions as well as your own. Take supervision if needed or talk to one of the psychologists for support. Sam will take the second shift, make sure you are in exchange with one another, even more than in other cases.”

Steve nodded his head. It was decided now, and he didn’t argue anymore.

Steve had a mind of his own, but once an order was given, he usually followed it without any more questions. His training as a soldier showed even now.

“And Clint?”

Clint lifted his head and looked back at Coulson again.

“Take a rest. Consider getting some counseling, this mission must have been hard on you.”

Clint grinned back at Coulson, the man whom he had known for the better half of his life now.

The grin was meant to hide the weariness, the strain that had built up those last few days but as always Coulson couldn’t be fooled.

“Will do.”

~

“Hey, my name is Steve Rogers,” Steve introduced himself. He didn’t offer his hand, kept his distance. “Please call me Steve. We all go with forenames here. No titles.”

The hierarchy was steep enough as it was, by the mere nature of their arrangement, the clients that came here were so submissive, that anything that could play into the master-slave idea had to disappear from the start. 

And in this case, it was clear why this was the route they were going with. 

Loki watched him warily but never met his eyes directly, his shoulders were slumped forward so that he would look smaller than he actually was, he had slipped into a kneeling position the minute he had stepped into the room and Steve had closed the door behind them. The overly large university hoodie made him appear even smaller, despite how tall he actually was.

Now they were both sitting on the floor in front of each other.

“What’s your name?” Steve asked gently.

“Loki?” The young man asked like he was unsure about his own name and would change it immediately if it was displeasing for any reason.

“That’s a very beautiful name,” Steve answered and offered him a smile. “And what’s your last name?”

It was hardly noticeable, but Loki perked up at the praise. The drive had taken a lot out of him and he was clearly scared out of his mind, but the words of affirmation clearly reached him throughout it all.

Maybe Clint had been right. Maybe they could make this work.

“Laufeyson.”

“Loki Laufeyson. I like the name,” Another smile. “What did you bring along with you?”

Steve nodded in the direction of the box-shaped device Loki was holding in his hands.

Whatever fraction of comfort had grown between them immediately disappeared, Loki’s guarded face became outright panicked, pleading quietly as he put down the little box on the floor between them, even though he clearly didn’t want to. An offering. A sign of submission.

“Please,” He whispered, tears rising in his green eyes. “Please don’t take it from me, please, I won’t even use it, I swear.”

Steve could feel his heart clench even after the hundredth time he experienced a scenario like this. The constant begging still made him hurt. It was so pathetic. Undignified. No human should have to talk like this to another human being.

“I won’t take this from you,” Steve promised sincerely. “This is yours. This belongs to you and you decide what happens to it. No one else can take this from you if you don’t want them to. This includes me.”

Loki’s eyes were still shimmering with unshed tears, but he seemed to understand as he listened because he picked the device back up and held it to his chest with both hands.

“It’s a Nintendo isn’t it?” 

Loki nodded warily. His hand twitched to take the device again, but he didn’t dare to.

"A switch, right?"

Another wordless nod.

“Where did you get it?”

“My master gave it to me,” Loki said, his voice was so full of emotion that it made Steve's heart twist painfully again. Being an empath really sucked in this line of work but he couldn't imagine it any other way. 

“It must be very valuable to you then,” Steve smiled at Loki once more but the young man's face stayed wary and frightened, not warming up one bit. 

In the beginning, it was all about smiles, about being patient and non-threatening and it might be many weeks or even months before Steve would get a single smile back. Yet Steve never doubted that it was worth it.

“I can show you where to put it, okay? Don’t worry, you will always have access to it.”

Loki nodded, even though he didn't appear to trust Steve in any way.

Slowly, to not startle the young man, Steve got up and asked Loki to follow him, which he did quietly holding the Nintendo close to his chest as he walked a few feet behind Steve.

The apartment was small, consisting of three rooms and two bathrooms. The living room and the kitchen were connected to one another and large windows opened up a view of a small forest nearby, and the silver-grey sky above. It was cozy. Held in warm neutral colours with splashes of yellow and pale blue that gave the rooms something comforting and bright, without being overly cheerful.

“Okay, here is the kitchen. This is the fridge, and this is the cabinet. You see the compartments that are lined with the green tape?” Steve asked and looked over at Loki who stood at a distance from him, slightly hunched over and frowning as he nodded.

“You’re always allowed to take food from these compartments. The rest is for cooking, but this is for you to choose from. Do you want something now?”

Loki shook his head, which was unsurprising, so Steve went on with his brief tour of the apartment, by showing Loki the room that was going to be his for as long as he needed the one-on-one care.

“This whole room belongs to you,” Steve explained. It was simple. Small. But even this was incredibly overwhelming, and Steve could tell by Loki’s wide-eyed stare, as he took in the twin bed, the wardrobe, and the desk that stood by the window.

“You can’t lock the door to this room, but you can close it, and if you do you can expect privacy. I will always knock before entering unless I believe you’re in danger.”

Loki looked at him puzzled, like the entire concept of privacy was strange to him. It probably was.

But he didn’t dare question it, at least not yet.

“There’s a bathroom here. It’s yours, I won’t use it. I’m sorry, but this door can’t be locked either,” Steve explained and allowed Loki a moment to look into the clean and simple bathroom before he took a few steps over to open the wardrobe. 

“You see, here in this closet, there’s a safe. You can just select a four-digit code and then only you will be able to open it,” Steve explained as he prepared the safe for a new code. “Here you go. Try to pick a code you’ll remember.”

Steve turned around so that Loki could pick the code, which he did after a few moments of hesitation. There was some beeping and then Steve turned back around at Loki.

“I chose the code 1313. Is that okay?” Loki asked anxiously and Steve almost sighed.

“It's a really good code, but you’re not supposed to tell me. This is a spot for you to put your stuff, so you don’t have to worry about anyone taking it. Including me.”

“I’m sorry. But I shouldn’t be keeping secrets,” Loki seemed doubtful, looking at the safe once more. “You’re allowed to check it. I don’t mind. I don’t want to keep secrets.”

“But maybe you should mind,” Steve tried gently. “How about that, you just pick a code for now, but you don’t have to put anything inside unless you want to? Just select a combination and don’t tell me.”

Loki still found the situation highly dubious, Steve could tell. Maybe he wondered if this was a test of sorts, but he did as he was told. Most of them did in the beginning, which was a blessing and a curse.

Behind Steve’s back, Loki created another code and kept it to himself this time around. But the Nintendo was still in his hands.

“You know two people can play with this one,” Steve said with a nod towards the device. “We have a TV in the living room, that can be connected to the controllers. Maybe we could try some day.”

Loki gripped the Nintendo tighter. Sharing it even briefly to play a game, seemed suspicious to him. And why wouldn’t it be? He didn’t know Steve. And this was the most valuable thing he owned, his only anchor to the life he had been taken from against his will.

“I know,” Loki whispered. “My master and his friends often played games together.”

“Oh. Were you allowed to join?”

“Not in those kinds of games, no.”

Steve nodded. He already knew what kind of games Loki was probably allowed to join, there was no need to pry and make him say it out loud.

“Well, we have gaming nights twice a week. It might be a bit overwhelming in the beginning, so we can get all consoles up here as well, but it might be fun someday,” Steve explained but Loki didn’t answer, not giving any indication if he would like that or not. He probably didn’t know.

They were lucky to have a lot of technological resources though. All thanks to Tony, who besides his excessive funding of SHIELD, was one of the first people to discover the therapeutic effect of videogames. It helped victims of human trafficking to regain autonomy and agency, make their own decisions and explore a safe, controlled space that didn’t threaten to overwhelm or traumatize them again.

Steve hadn’t believed in it in the beginning, but the effects were indisputable.

He had seen people who didn’t dare go to the bathroom without permission creating entire worlds all on their own and most importantly finding joy in doing so. They started developing ambitions and trust in their skills and ever since then Steve embraced video games as a part of treatment.

“Let’s have a look at my bedroom, so you’ll know where to find me,” Steve went on and left the room to open a door right next to Loki’s, revealing a room that was almost identical to the one they had just left.

Again, it was to help fight the sense of hierarchy, so Steve had the exact same set of furniture, the same amount of space. No extras. The only difference was that his door could be locked, but only with a key, he held. 

Loki peered into the room, but his expression didn’t give away what his thoughts and opinions were, the only thing that was painfully obvious, was that Loki didn’t want to be here. He hadn't relaxed the slightest bit, his eyes remained haunted and flickered around nervously while he held onto the console in his hands as though it was his lifeline.

“I’ll be here most of the time, especially the first few weeks,” Steve explained. “I’ll be taking shifts with a colleague, his name is Sam. I’ll introduce him to you tomorrow. You can knock on this door at any time. It doesn’t matter if it’s night or day, or for what reason, someone will be there. None of us will ever be mad at you for asking for help, no matter what. Okay?”

Loki slowly nodded his head, but Steve knew that he would need a lot more encouragement to seek help when he needed it. He most likely needed to be told at every given opportunity that it was okay for him to ask for something.

“Do you have any questions so far?” Steve asked gently. 

There must be a million questions buzzing around Loki’s head but he most likely wouldn’t be able to voice most of them just yet. 

Steve allowed the silence to last a while until Loki finally managed to come up with a question. 

“I’ll be sleeping alone in that room?” He asked, in a whispering tone, that sounded fretful and insecure.

Steve nodded slowly.

“Yes, but we can leave both doors open?” Steve offered. It was important to both be extremely kind and mindful of the other person's comfort zone, but also to set boundaries when possible and necessary. “How about we try that and if it doesn’t work out, we’ll figure out another way?”

Loki nodded his head but said nothing else.

“Today nothing much is going to happen,” Steve went on to explain. “We just get to know each other a bit, perhaps we can take some time to rest, and later on I can tell you a bit about the rules of this place and how everything will go.”

“Could I please-“, Loki’s voice almost cracked but he went on after a moment. “Please, may I know about the rules now? I don’t want to break them.”

Steve’s gaze softened.

“Sure. Let’s sit down in the kitchen and talk things over,” Steve said and lead the way to the kitchen, which was only a few steps away in the tiny apartment complex. He sat down on one of the chairs and waited for Loki to do the same, but he kept standing awkwardly by the door.

“You’re allowed to sit on the chairs,” Steve explained when he noticed Loki's hesitation. “You’re allowed on all furniture.”

“Why?” Loki asked, his brows drawn together in a distrustful frown. 

He expected it to be a trap. A lot of the things he was about to hear would sound like traps to him. But in a way, his wariness wasn’t a bad sign. He still questioned authority, unlike some of the slavery victims, Steve has seen before, who mindlessly did as they were told, too numb to care whether or not they were being fooled. 

“Because we are equal here. We’re in different positions, that’s hard to miss, but neither one of us is above or below the other. We can either both sit on the chairs, or we can both sit on the floor. Is it okay if we sit here?”

Loki nodded his head and carefully walked over to sit down on the chair, sitting on the very edge of it, in a position that couldn’t be comfortable. It would take time for him to feel at ease doing the things he was forbidden to do before.

“So, about the rules. We’ll meet in the kitchen at eight in the morning to prepare breakfast. One pm for lunch and six pm for dinner. We always prepare the food together and clean up together. Twice a week I’ll go shopping. We’ll see how things go, maybe you can join me but maybe it’ll take a bit more time,” Steve explained to Loki. The young man did his best to focus, but he was weak and exhausted, and Steve knew that likely he would have to go over things again. 

Which was no problem. Patience was a strength of his, without it he would never be able to do this job. 

“Once a week we clean the apartment, again we do that together. Twice a week we’ll go for a walk. There’s a park here. It has no public access so it’s very calm. On the fridge, there’s a chart with all the planned activities. I hope with time we can add some that we both enjoy,” Steve said and smiled at Loki before he went on. “The chart also shows when Sam and I will be here. Besides the chart on the fridge, there’s also a list of the rules we just talked about, in case you want to reassure yourself. One of the rules is, that we won’t be having sex.”

For the first time, there was a visible reaction on Loki’s face, his mouth gaped open, and he frowned. For a moment Steve thought that he might protest or talk back but then he didn’t, his face just became resigned, a shadow cast over his already dark features.

He merely nodded his head, but Steve caught the glimmer of tears in his eyes.

“That makes you sad?” Steve asked softly, sympathetically, and watched as Loki bit down on his lower lip as he gave one nod of his head.

“Why is that?”

“It feels good,” Loki whispered, as a tear dropped down his cheek. “It’s the only thing that feels good. And no one wants to fuck me anymore.”

Steve remembered the briefing Clint had given him, the mention of the Institute gave him enough information to know that this was most likely a conditioned desire, not a natural one. A kind of artificial nymphomania. It was insidious truly.

And always a challenge for the employees. 

The selection process for SHIELD employees was tough. Besides multiple interviews, there were thorough background checks and a psychological evaluation. 

The process was necessary, there were malicious people, drawn in by the idea of holding power over these extremely vulnerable individuals who would apply to a position only to harm the ones they were meant to protect.

Even with the strict selection, the special qualifications and tests one needed for the position as well as the amount of clinical supervision and control through other colleagues, the temptation to prey upon the people they were meant to protect was there, even amongst the employees who truly wanted to help them.

Everyone held a bit of darkness. 

And it happened frequently, that you were alone with an attractive, young person, offering themselves up and pleading so heartbreakingly, so sincerely for you to fuck them, that it even feels cruel to them no.

Sometimes they get upset, angry, or depressed, they threaten to kill themselves or withdraw into their shell completely.

But giving in wasn’t an option. 

Never.

Steve handed Loki a tissue who took it and mumbled a broken thank you.

“I’m sorry Loki. I know that must hurt badly.”

“Everything hurts,” Loki sobbed quietly, pressing the tissue against his eyes. “I don’t know what to do anymore. Nothing ever feels good anymore.”

“Things will feel good again,” Steve promised. “In a different way than they did before. But it won’t always be the way it is now. And we can have physical contact. We can hug. I can hold your hand. But we won’t be having sex at any point. That has nothing to do with you, it’s the rules we have here.”

“What’s the punishment if I break one of the rules?” Loki asked as he looked back at Steve.

His eyes seemed so sore, swollen, and red like he had been crying for days. But the green within them was still clear and pristine.

“There are no punishments here,” Steve said. “And no rewards. The reward is getting better. And forming bonds.”

For a brief moment, Loki met his gaze directly, and Steve could see all the doubt and desperation within them, that came as the remainder of the world he knew crumbled around him. 

Steve was looking at a person that was being kept upright by the idea of punishment and reward, that got out of bed and made it through every day in the dangerous and painful world he was living in, with no other goal besides trying to feel good and avoid pain.

And Steve had just taken all of that away, leaving no guidance, no motivation. No hope. 

The young man crumpled down on the floor at Steve’s feet and began to cry violently, his whole body shook with the intensity of his sobs.

“I want to go home,” Loki cried out. “Please let me go home. I don’t want to be here…I’m sorry. I’ll make up for everything, I’ll be good. Please. Just let me go home. I want to go back...”

Steve sat down on the floor next to Loki and after a moment of consideration, he gently placed a hand on his shoulder. Loki didn’t flinch away, so he got a little closer, lying an arm around him and began to stroke his trembling back with his hand.

He didn’t say anything, as Loki continued to beg brokenly. There was nothing comforting he could say to a person in so much pain.

He could only wait for the promises he had made to come true. Slowly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, professional help! Loki is still in anguish though so...not yay. 
> 
> I hope I didn't bore you, but I wanted to give some background info into how this organization works, how they keep their employees and patients safe, and how they intend to help. I just really wanted to explore how a person so thoroughly hurt can be helped bit by bit. And there's Steve! 
> 
> The moral, more mature counterpart to Thor lmao. 
> 
> I really hope you liked the chapter, and I'd love to hear your thoughts, they always motivate and inspire me so much <3


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